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Not much to do...

Posted by SoaringRaven in Raven's Ramblings, 19 December 2014 · 3 views

I just went from having too much to do, to having too little to do. I just finished my final semester at community college (I decided to drop out.) I am only working one day a week now. I intend to get another job, either as a teacher's aide or a substitute teacher. However, I am waiting until the winter break is over before I check in with the HR departm...


How do I control impulsive behavior?

Posted by confused in confused's Blog, 19 December 2014 · 29 views

I get this sense of urgency when I want to do something that I want it done now. I need to find a new pdoc before March. There is one who takes my insurance, that my mdoc recommended. I saw him a couple of times in an outpatient program in 2006. I remember seeing him, but I don't remember his personality. I know he was professional.

I e-mailed a friend l...


this just in

Posted by larkspur in larkspur lane, 19 December 2014 · 50 views

I officially do not have any sexually transmitted infections. Well, at least, I know I don't have chlamydia, gonhorrea, or HIV. I am still waiting on my herpes test to come back. When I was discussing it with my GP, he agreed that even if I have multiple partners, if I am only with women then I would still be at low risk, and the greatest area of risk wou...


Not feeling as upbeat now...

Posted by ananke in My mad fat blog, 19 December 2014 · 29 views

When I left the assessment I was ridiculously happy. Like happier than I've been in years. I was so excited I called up my friend who, to her credit, was happy I was happy. And now I feel like shit.

I went from thinking that I just had anxiety and depression, which granted were chronic, to having a personality disorder. Thats a totally different and terr...


shadow, solstice, anger

Posted by yarnandcats in the yarn closet, 19 December 2014 · 50 views
overwhelm, sacred space

the Shadow Work

We don't
understand it all
found somethings at
this link
a bit helpful

about anger
(take the wheat)
(leave the chaff)
(whatever works for you)
(click with Eyes Open)

the anger and rage collection

o gods
the Solstice
and We are withered
and cold
and nearly not breathing
We wait
for the Other Side
for the W...


Surrender and Humility

Posted by dragonfly23 in dragonfly23's Blog, 19 December 2014 · 49 views

This entry will be very retrospective. Move along if this stuff bores you.

So anyway, I have written many times that I was mis diagnosed for decades also was not a compliant patient for decades.
One reason was nothing that I was being given to help with my MI was working, the other was I did not know how active I needed to be to get better. The level of...


Hard night

Posted by Geek in Geek's Blog, 18 December 2014 · 60 views

Last night was hard. I was getting ready for bed and was bowled over by a depression wave. It came out of nowhere. Suddenly I hurt. You know what I mean... that ache that comes from nowhere and everywhere. I was crying. It felt like there was an elephant sitting on my chest.

Why don't I remember to take my PRN? That would've been a good time, probably. E...



Posted by baepolar in Overthrowing my Corrupt Mind, 18 December 2014 · 39 views

Sometimes I wonder why I do it (do what?)

Like, why do I cut? Why do I do drugs? Why do I binge and purge? What do any of these things achieve, except making me miserable?

I went away to rehab for 21 days and used the whole time I was there, even picked up a new drug (subutex - don't judge me). I just can't seem to stop escaping. I wish I could constru...


APs effecting my heart.

Posted by Siggmin in Siggmin's Corner, 18 December 2014 · 104 views

All the antipsychotics have finally effected me physically. I had an EKG done last month (when I was still on Saphris), and the results came back. My family doctor is sending me to a cardiologist. My heart rate is irregular (long). I have to have another heart test, an ultrasound of my heart, and wear a heart monitor. I am not happy. It'll probably mean t...


still behind

Posted by lysergia in one more try, 18 December 2014 · 67 views

haven't got to the boards upstairs since yesterday yet, caught up on ONE blog, sorry i'm being so slow with the rest. i really do want to know what's up with everyone else (i'm nosey like that, and besides, i care about y'all). i just can't seem to get the time to read and respond, when so many of us are needing to do things that are OFF the computer (o...


Relapse and pot psychosis

Posted by SpiderV in BrittneyV93's Blog, 18 December 2014 · 54 views

It's been four or five months since I've touched a drug
and the other night I smoked some green
I got out of the psychosis with a long nap
but today things are different...
My paranoid feelings are fading a little
and I'm thanking a God I wasn't stuck in that forever...
and at the same time
I wonder
Was it just a raw and real thing that happened?

It was...


Final grades are in

Posted by writehellarandomshiny in The Real World Editorial Of SpriteandShiny, 17 December 2014 · 117 views

H2O Zumba P

Fencing: Beginning P
Swimming: Beginning P

Introduction to Social Work B

SRV: Intro to Social Welfare A

Multicultural Competence in a Diverse World B


Look, ma! I passed.



Posted by MellyDonut in MellyDonut's Blog, 17 December 2014 · 59 views

I don't have much to say except that Finals are going to be the death of me. I had my Lab practical on Monday, which I did horribly on, I got a 60. I don't know weather there will be a curve or not. Tuesday I had a 12 page research paper on the United States Chinese Trade imbalance, which of course I hadn't started since I had been focusing on everything...


Same subject different day

Posted by goddessone in goddessone's Blog, 17 December 2014 · 93 views

I talked to the pharmacist today. She said I should be over withdrawal by now. Recommended I see the doctor. Pdoc doesn't seem to understand withdrawal or why I'm still having issues so I made an appointment with gp on Friday.

I have written about this so much and I'm sorry to anyone who takes the time to read this. I'm worried something is really wrong...


Not Helping.

Posted by treacleweasel in so grease my knees and fleece my bees..., 17 December 2014 · 65 views

IIIIIIIIIIIIII have to admit I don't think my medicine is working.

It didn't make me feel better last week when everything was falling to shit and I felt like I was drowning and the words I Want To Kill Myself kept popping into my head (even though I never mean it, they're just thoughts and I can't stop them) and when I tried to talk to my girlfriend abo...


End of Term Tiredness

Posted by daisy.dot in When chocolate doesn't cut it, 17 December 2014 · 54 views

Tomorrow is my last day of term.

All I can say is it has been the hardest and most stressful term of my entire life. During these 6 weeks I've, broken up with my boyfriend, watched my twin make a move on him, maybe fallen for my best friend (who has a girlfriend...), taken my first set of mocks, made 3 speeches to over 100 people (which for someone who i...


Hard to track progress

Posted by Ailiose in Ailiose's Blog, 17 December 2014 · 46 views

Last week I did really well. I took my medicine every day. I ate healthy. I went outside and went to work. I only had one panic attack and two cryfits. This week, I am still taking my medicine, but had a panic attack today and can feel myself going back into depression-mode.
I really don't want to go to work tomorrow. I'm afraid I won't sleep and then I...


Bi-polar? And 2014

Posted by !LostMind! in !LostMind!'s Blog, 16 December 2014 · 73 views

So last time I was on about relationships. I still want one. I realize i do live in my head quite a lot and I can come across as selfish. I can be selfish. I don't really mean to but truth is its there.

I was feeling pretty good facing that; I guess you could say I was manic. I don't think I'm BP - I do get depression its just no matter what I seem to r...


Not confronting my mother

Posted by StormBeforeCalm in It's just the storm before the calm, 16 December 2014 · 60 views

See my last post for the back story. http://www.crazyboar...abusive-mother/ I called my mother back and decided not to confront her about the abuse because she was completely irrational and delusional. There is no point in trying to have a calm, rational discussion with someone who is adamant that...


Quick spew

Posted by BlurredBoundaries in BlurredBoundaries' Blog, 16 December 2014 · 237 views

I am so ashamed of myself.I feel stupid and I wish I wasn't crazy.I wish I could be normal.I wish I could've had a normal childhood and knew how to live and love like a normal person...and how to get over a breakup like a normal person.

I'm thinking of making my blogs private cause I'm so ashamed.Not sure yet because sometimes I do really need other peop...

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