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Not much to do...

Posted by SoaringRaven in Raven's Ramblings, 19 December 2014 · 3 views

I just went from having too much to do, to having too little to do. I just finished my final semester at community college (I decided to drop out.) I am only working one day a week now. I intend to get another job, either as a teacher's aide or a substitute teacher. However, I am waiting until the winter break is over before I check in with the HR departm...

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How do I control impulsive behavior?

Posted by confused in confused's Blog, 19 December 2014 · 29 views

I get this sense of urgency when I want to do something that I want it done now. I need to find a new pdoc before March. There is one who takes my insurance, that my mdoc recommended. I saw him a couple of times in an outpatient program in 2006. I remember seeing him, but I don't remember his personality. I know he was professional.

I e-mailed a friend l...

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this just in

Posted by larkspur in larkspur lane, 19 December 2014 · 50 views

I officially do not have any sexually transmitted infections. Well, at least, I know I don't have chlamydia, gonhorrea, or HIV. I am still waiting on my herpes test to come back. When I was discussing it with my GP, he agreed that even if I have multiple partners, if I am only with women then I would still be at low risk, and the greatest area of risk wou...

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Not feeling as upbeat now...

Posted by ananke in My mad fat blog, 19 December 2014 · 29 views

When I left the assessment I was ridiculously happy. Like happier than I've been in years. I was so excited I called up my friend who, to her credit, was happy I was happy. And now I feel like shit.

I went from thinking that I just had anxiety and depression, which granted were chronic, to having a personality disorder. Thats a totally different and terr...

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shadow, solstice, anger

Posted by yarnandcats in the yarn closet, 19 December 2014 · 50 views
overwhelm, sacred space

the Shadow Work
hard

We don't
really
understand it all
but
found somethings at
this link
a bit helpful

about anger
(take the wheat)
(leave the chaff)
(whatever works for you)
(click with Eyes Open)

the anger and rage collection

o gods
the Solstice
approaches
and We are withered
and cold
and nearly not breathing
We wait
for the Other Side
for the W...

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Surrender and Humility

Posted by dragonfly23 in dragonfly23's Blog, 19 December 2014 · 49 views

This entry will be very retrospective. Move along if this stuff bores you.


So anyway, I have written many times that I was mis diagnosed for decades also was not a compliant patient for decades.
One reason was nothing that I was being given to help with my MI was working, the other was I did not know how active I needed to be to get better. The level of...

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Hard night

Posted by Geek in Geek's Blog, 18 December 2014 · 60 views

Last night was hard. I was getting ready for bed and was bowled over by a depression wave. It came out of nowhere. Suddenly I hurt. You know what I mean... that ache that comes from nowhere and everywhere. I was crying. It felt like there was an elephant sitting on my chest.

Why don't I remember to take my PRN? That would've been a good time, probably. E...

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why

Posted by baepolar in Overthrowing my Corrupt Mind, 18 December 2014 · 39 views

Sometimes I wonder why I do it (do what?)

Like, why do I cut? Why do I do drugs? Why do I binge and purge? What do any of these things achieve, except making me miserable?

I went away to rehab for 21 days and used the whole time I was there, even picked up a new drug (subutex - don't judge me). I just can't seem to stop escaping. I wish I could constru...

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APs effecting my heart.

Posted by Siggmin in Siggmin's Corner, 18 December 2014 · 104 views

All the antipsychotics have finally effected me physically. I had an EKG done last month (when I was still on Saphris), and the results came back. My family doctor is sending me to a cardiologist. My heart rate is irregular (long). I have to have another heart test, an ultrasound of my heart, and wear a heart monitor. I am not happy. It'll probably mean t...

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still behind

Posted by lysergia in one more try, 18 December 2014 · 67 views

haven't got to the boards upstairs since yesterday yet, caught up on ONE blog, sorry i'm being so slow with the rest. i really do want to know what's up with everyone else (i'm nosey like that, and besides, i care about y'all). i just can't seem to get the time to read and respond, when so many of us are needing to do things that are OFF the computer (o...

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Relapse and pot psychosis

Posted by SpiderV in BrittneyV93's Blog, 18 December 2014 · 54 views

It's been four or five months since I've touched a drug
and the other night I smoked some green
I got out of the psychosis with a long nap
but today things are different...
My paranoid feelings are fading a little
and I'm thanking a God I wasn't stuck in that forever...
and at the same time
I wonder
Was it just a raw and real thing that happened?

It was...

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Final grades are in

Posted by writehellarandomshiny in The Real World Editorial Of SpriteandShiny, 17 December 2014 · 117 views

H2O Zumba P

Fencing: Beginning P
Swimming: Beginning P

Introduction to Social Work B

SRV: Intro to Social Welfare A

Multicultural Competence in a Diverse World B


(P=Passing)


Look, ma! I passed.

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Finals

Posted by MellyDonut in MellyDonut's Blog, 17 December 2014 · 59 views
College

I don't have much to say except that Finals are going to be the death of me. I had my Lab practical on Monday, which I did horribly on, I got a 60. I don't know weather there will be a curve or not. Tuesday I had a 12 page research paper on the United States Chinese Trade imbalance, which of course I hadn't started since I had been focusing on everything...

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Same subject different day

Posted by goddessone in goddessone's Blog, 17 December 2014 · 93 views

I talked to the pharmacist today. She said I should be over withdrawal by now. Recommended I see the doctor. Pdoc doesn't seem to understand withdrawal or why I'm still having issues so I made an appointment with gp on Friday.

I have written about this so much and I'm sorry to anyone who takes the time to read this. I'm worried something is really wrong...

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Not Helping.

Posted by treacleweasel in so grease my knees and fleece my bees..., 17 December 2014 · 65 views

IIIIIIIIIIIIII have to admit I don't think my medicine is working.

It didn't make me feel better last week when everything was falling to shit and I felt like I was drowning and the words I Want To Kill Myself kept popping into my head (even though I never mean it, they're just thoughts and I can't stop them) and when I tried to talk to my girlfriend abo...

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End of Term Tiredness

Posted by daisy.dot in When chocolate doesn't cut it, 17 December 2014 · 54 views

Tomorrow is my last day of term.

All I can say is it has been the hardest and most stressful term of my entire life. During these 6 weeks I've, broken up with my boyfriend, watched my twin make a move on him, maybe fallen for my best friend (who has a girlfriend...), taken my first set of mocks, made 3 speeches to over 100 people (which for someone who i...

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Hard to track progress

Posted by Ailiose in Ailiose's Blog, 17 December 2014 · 46 views

Last week I did really well. I took my medicine every day. I ate healthy. I went outside and went to work. I only had one panic attack and two cryfits. This week, I am still taking my medicine, but had a panic attack today and can feel myself going back into depression-mode.
I really don't want to go to work tomorrow. I'm afraid I won't sleep and then I...

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Bi-polar? And 2014

Posted by !LostMind! in !LostMind!'s Blog, 16 December 2014 · 73 views

So last time I was on about relationships. I still want one. I realize i do live in my head quite a lot and I can come across as selfish. I can be selfish. I don't really mean to but truth is its there.

I was feeling pretty good facing that; I guess you could say I was manic. I don't think I'm BP - I do get depression its just no matter what I seem to r...

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Not confronting my mother

Posted by StormBeforeCalm in It's just the storm before the calm, 16 December 2014 · 60 views

See my last post for the back story. http://www.crazyboar...abusive-mother/ I called my mother back and decided not to confront her about the abuse because she was completely irrational and delusional. There is no point in trying to have a calm, rational discussion with someone who is adamant that...

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Quick spew

Posted by BlurredBoundaries in BlurredBoundaries' Blog, 16 December 2014 · 237 views

I am so ashamed of myself.I feel stupid and I wish I wasn't crazy.I wish I could be normal.I wish I could've had a normal childhood and knew how to live and love like a normal person...and how to get over a breakup like a normal person.

I'm thinking of making my blogs private cause I'm so ashamed.Not sure yet because sometimes I do really need other peop...



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