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I've taken myself off of my meds several times. Every once in awhile I think I'm fine and don't need my meds any more. Silly me. This has *never* been a good idea. The physical and psychological effects have been devistating every single time.
I've been taken off of my meds by my pdoc once or twice over the years. One time I insisted and the pdoc finally agreed against his better judgement--since I was going to do it anyway. The only time it "worked" was when I had been on maintenance meds for over a year with no symptoms and we slowly weaned me off of the meds. I was lucky and was able to stay off of them for several years.
Going off your meds isn't a very good idea.
justmary
Has anyone actually braved going off all their meds?
I know many of us get the urge, but I don't know anyone who follow
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#22
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Posted 04 November 2007 - 09:55 AM
I'm new to meds and I know what I was like before them (evil) and have been on a few different cocktails in the 6 months since I've been on them. This has been the suckiest part of my life (oh, did I mention I'm a newly wed?). You know what? I don't think I'll ever be able to stop taking meds as much as I hate it (I really do hate hurting the ones I love and I'd hate to die in some whacked out manic episode). I'm just going to have to suffer until I can find something that works and man, doesn't that make me angry 
....but one thing's for sure - when I feel good, I mean, really, really good, when that mania takes over and I'm on top of the world, to the point where it's another person 
, well, I might skip a dose or two 
.
(I am NOT advocating this - I just know what happens - I don't think I need my meds, or my family, or my friends, or my docs, or anyone or anything - I am invincibile, untouchable and amazing - and with the right other kind of drugs, I even believe I can fly).
....but one thing's for sure - when I feel good, I mean, really, really good, when that mania takes over and I'm on top of the world, to the point where it's another person , well, I might skip a dose or two .(I am NOT advocating this - I just know what happens - I don't think I need my meds, or my family, or my friends, or my docs, or anyone or anything - I am invincibile, untouchable and amazing - and with the right other kind of drugs, I even believe I can fly).
dx: BP2, BPD, ADHD, OCD and there's probably more...but we're just ignoring it all until the BP2 is under control (as if I need more things to obsess about...LOL).
Rx: 10mg of Lexapro, 50mg of Topamax, 150mg of Lamictal and holding strong while pdoc sniggers.
"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and gosh darn it people like me!" ~ Stuart Smalley
Rx: 10mg of Lexapro, 50mg of Topamax, 150mg of Lamictal and holding strong while pdoc sniggers.
"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and gosh darn it people like me!" ~ Stuart Smalley
#23
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 06:04 AM
This is a super old thread, but I thought it was interesting.
I've tried to go off all my meds many times. I really resent the fact that I have to take them. But it has always ended up completely catastrophic. I've come to terms with the fact that I will likely always be on an anti-depressant. I do hope I can wean off the others eventually (or at least reduce the dosages), but I will not ever be taking myself of my anti-depressants again. My psychiatrist tells me I'm a lifer, and he's probably right.
I won't go off insomnia meds, either, but that's a whole different story.
I've tried to go off all my meds many times. I really resent the fact that I have to take them. But it has always ended up completely catastrophic. I've come to terms with the fact that I will likely always be on an anti-depressant. I do hope I can wean off the others eventually (or at least reduce the dosages), but I will not ever be taking myself of my anti-depressants again. My psychiatrist tells me I'm a lifer, and he's probably right.
I won't go off insomnia meds, either, but that's a whole different story.
Love, Daisy
a dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep. in dreams you will lose your heartaches. whatever you wish for, you keep. have faith in your dreams, and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. no matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will come true.
Dx: MDD of the treatment-resistant, atypical variety (or Bipolar II, we're still undecided), MAJOR insomnia, ADHD, and some flavor of anxiety disorder
Rx: Lamictal 200 mg, Wellbutrin XL 450 mg, Zoloft 100 mg, Xanax 1 mg (insomnia and for anxiety PRN), Restoril 30 mg, Vyvanse 70 mg, Amphetamine 20 mg PRN
Previous Rx: Pristiq, Lexapro, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin SR, Prozac, Effexor, Adderall XR, Concerta, Ritalin, Trazodone, Seroquel, Sonata, Lunesta, Ambien CR, Ambien, Aplenzin
my posts are often novels. i'm a creative writer and, needless to say, brevity is not my strength. i apologize in advance.
a dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep. in dreams you will lose your heartaches. whatever you wish for, you keep. have faith in your dreams, and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. no matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will come true.
Dx: MDD of the treatment-resistant, atypical variety (or Bipolar II, we're still undecided), MAJOR insomnia, ADHD, and some flavor of anxiety disorder
Rx: Lamictal 200 mg, Wellbutrin XL 450 mg, Zoloft 100 mg, Xanax 1 mg (insomnia and for anxiety PRN), Restoril 30 mg, Vyvanse 70 mg, Amphetamine 20 mg PRN
Previous Rx: Pristiq, Lexapro, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin SR, Prozac, Effexor, Adderall XR, Concerta, Ritalin, Trazodone, Seroquel, Sonata, Lunesta, Ambien CR, Ambien, Aplenzin
my posts are often novels. i'm a creative writer and, needless to say, brevity is not my strength. i apologize in advance.
#24
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 08:29 AM
it is an interesting thread...though my sad answer is that i tried going off the one drug i was on...when my depression had been in remission for 6 years. next thing i know it, it springs back, infinitely worse and more confusing symptoms, and many more drugs for now. the thought is that i won't need all the drugs forever, but my thought is that i'll probably need something.
some variation of: bipolar NOS, adjustment disorder w/ mixed mood and anxiety components; or MDD w/ anxiety. still a dx in progress, I guess. Some trauma elements.
current RXs: Effexor (150 mg), Ativan (0.5 mg am, 1 mg pm), Lamictal (250 mg); levothyroxine and birth control.
Past Rxs: zoloft (no significant effect); lexapro (went up to 20 mg but hit an anxiety/akathesia problem); wellbutrin; seroquel; ambien (worked wonderfully); Risperdal (great when needed, but gradually went off now that stability happened in order to decrease total drug use)
current RXs: Effexor (150 mg), Ativan (0.5 mg am, 1 mg pm), Lamictal (250 mg); levothyroxine and birth control.
Past Rxs: zoloft (no significant effect); lexapro (went up to 20 mg but hit an anxiety/akathesia problem); wellbutrin; seroquel; ambien (worked wonderfully); Risperdal (great when needed, but gradually went off now that stability happened in order to decrease total drug use)
#25
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 10:52 AM
When I find myself asking the question, wouldn't it be nice to be off all these meds, I know what I'm really asking is "wouldn't it be nice to not be mentally ill."
Current Dx: BPII, rapid cycling; GAD, OCD, PMDD
peace
it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the middle of those things and still be calm in your heart.
peace
it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the middle of those things and still be calm in your heart.
#26
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 11:13 AM
Phoenix_Rising, on Mar 20 2009, 12:52 PM, said:
When I find myself asking the question, wouldn't it be nice to be off all these meds, I know what I'm really asking is "wouldn't it be nice to not be mentally ill."
i think that is exactly right. i never thought of that before.
(you're so smart! no i am not kidding either)
current rx: bupropion SR 300mg, lamotrigine 200 mg, citalopram 20mg, 0.125 mg synthroid, 300mg B6, clonazepam in various doses, thc, nicotine, caffeine, refined sugar as needed
current dx: depression (maybe bp2), ptsd, ddNOS, anxiety NOS, narcolepsy/sleep disorder pending dx, ED issues, cat-induced insanity, motherhood
current dx: depression (maybe bp2), ptsd, ddNOS, anxiety NOS, narcolepsy/sleep disorder pending dx, ED issues, cat-induced insanity, motherhood
#27
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 11:16 AM
Phoenix_Rising, on Mar 20 2009, 08:52 AM, said:
When I find myself asking the question, wouldn't it be nice to be off all these meds, I know what I'm really asking is "wouldn't it be nice to not be mentally ill."
That's a great observation, PR.
.
Dx: Bipolar I, ADD
Rx: Lithium Carbonate ER 1200mg, Carbatrol 400mg, Lamictal 200mg, Risperidone 3mg, Adderall XR 25mg, Seroquel 50-100mg PRN,
"The trick, Fletcher, is that we are trying to overcome our limitations in order, patiently. We don't tackle flying through rock until a little later in the program." RB, JLS
Rx: Lithium Carbonate ER 1200mg, Carbatrol 400mg, Lamictal 200mg, Risperidone 3mg, Adderall XR 25mg, Seroquel 50-100mg PRN,
"The trick, Fletcher, is that we are trying to overcome our limitations in order, patiently. We don't tackle flying through rock until a little later in the program." RB, JLS
#28
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 05:18 PM
Phoenix_Rising, on Mar 20 2009, 10:52 AM, said:
When I find myself asking the question, wouldn't it be nice to be off all these meds, I know what I'm really asking is "wouldn't it be nice to not be mentally ill."
So, so true! I guess the hope is that we won't ALWAYS be mentally ill.
Love, Daisy
a dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep. in dreams you will lose your heartaches. whatever you wish for, you keep. have faith in your dreams, and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. no matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will come true.
Dx: MDD of the treatment-resistant, atypical variety (or Bipolar II, we're still undecided), MAJOR insomnia, ADHD, and some flavor of anxiety disorder
Rx: Lamictal 200 mg, Wellbutrin XL 450 mg, Zoloft 100 mg, Xanax 1 mg (insomnia and for anxiety PRN), Restoril 30 mg, Vyvanse 70 mg, Amphetamine 20 mg PRN
Previous Rx: Pristiq, Lexapro, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin SR, Prozac, Effexor, Adderall XR, Concerta, Ritalin, Trazodone, Seroquel, Sonata, Lunesta, Ambien CR, Ambien, Aplenzin
my posts are often novels. i'm a creative writer and, needless to say, brevity is not my strength. i apologize in advance.
a dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep. in dreams you will lose your heartaches. whatever you wish for, you keep. have faith in your dreams, and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through. no matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish will come true.
Dx: MDD of the treatment-resistant, atypical variety (or Bipolar II, we're still undecided), MAJOR insomnia, ADHD, and some flavor of anxiety disorder
Rx: Lamictal 200 mg, Wellbutrin XL 450 mg, Zoloft 100 mg, Xanax 1 mg (insomnia and for anxiety PRN), Restoril 30 mg, Vyvanse 70 mg, Amphetamine 20 mg PRN
Previous Rx: Pristiq, Lexapro, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin SR, Prozac, Effexor, Adderall XR, Concerta, Ritalin, Trazodone, Seroquel, Sonata, Lunesta, Ambien CR, Ambien, Aplenzin
my posts are often novels. i'm a creative writer and, needless to say, brevity is not my strength. i apologize in advance.
#29
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 06:15 PM
lindsay, on Mar 20 2009, 04:18 PM, said:
Phoenix_Rising, on Mar 20 2009, 10:52 AM, said:
When I find myself asking the question, wouldn't it be nice to be off all these meds, I know what I'm really asking is "wouldn't it be nice to not be mentally ill."
So, so true! I guess the hope is that we won't ALWAYS be mentally ill.
i always wondered what id do if i could cure the bipolar disorder i have. hmmm
bipolar disorder
im on lithium er, 1200mg and doing a bit better.
im on lithium er, 1200mg and doing a bit better.
#30
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Posted 20 March 2009 - 06:23 PM
There are some days when I don't know which is worse, the disease or the cure. I have four years into this diagnosis, and I've been on LOTS of meds. I still cycle up and down, about every two months. I think I went 5 months one time when I was on risperdal, but it was tough on the girlie hormones, so I was forced off it. Now I'm fuzzy headed, can't sleep, constantly dying of thirst, have huge holes in my memory, and have hand and arm tremors. On top of the original symptoms, lol!
The ironic part is this: when I was at my worst, behavior-wise, I've been medicated. Sure, prediagnosis I once stayed in bed three weeks at one time. But medicated and manic, I had three car accidents in 6 hours. I may have done a half-hearted you-know-what attempt when I was 14, but I OD'd on my MI pills in a mixed state.
Honestly, there are days in which I think I should just quit the meds and let myself go flaming crazy again. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad or as frequent as it is now.
/end pity party
The ironic part is this: when I was at my worst, behavior-wise, I've been medicated. Sure, prediagnosis I once stayed in bed three weeks at one time. But medicated and manic, I had three car accidents in 6 hours. I may have done a half-hearted you-know-what attempt when I was 14, but I OD'd on my MI pills in a mixed state.
Honestly, there are days in which I think I should just quit the meds and let myself go flaming crazy again. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad or as frequent as it is now.
/end pity party
Diagnosis: BP I, Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Meds Currently On: Lithium 1200 mg, Topamax 200 mg, Zyprexa Zydis 15 mg, Cogentin 1 mg, Xanax 2mg prn
Main Problems Right Now: Slowly upping the zyprexa to 20mg to see if it will conquer this horrible mood episode. Taking Cogentin to try and deal with the restless legs that the zyprexa is causing. Again. Sigh.
Meds Currently On: Lithium 1200 mg, Topamax 200 mg, Zyprexa Zydis 15 mg, Cogentin 1 mg, Xanax 2mg prn
Main Problems Right Now: Slowly upping the zyprexa to 20mg to see if it will conquer this horrible mood episode. Taking Cogentin to try and deal with the restless legs that the zyprexa is causing. Again. Sigh.
#31
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Posted 05 September 2009 - 05:18 AM
I did. 4 days. And what happened?
I got suicidally depressed, hallucinating, self-injuring and I ended up here at rehab.
I had to stop med school for a year.
I wouldn't do it again. EVER.
I got suicidally depressed, hallucinating, self-injuring and I ended up here at rehab.
I had to stop med school for a year.
I wouldn't do it again. EVER.
"The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this: A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive.
To him�
a touch is a blow,
a sound is a noise,
a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy,
a friend is a lover,
a lover is a god,
and failure is death.
Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create - so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating." -Pearl S. Buck
Visit my blog: http://paperskyscrapers.wordpress.com
Meds: 10 mg Abilify, 150mg Lamictal, 2mg Biperiden and 200mg Seroquel
To him�
a touch is a blow,
a sound is a noise,
a misfortune is a tragedy,
a joy is an ecstasy,
a friend is a lover,
a lover is a god,
and failure is death.
Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create - so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, his very breath is cut off from him. He must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency he is not really alive unless he is creating." -Pearl S. Buck
Visit my blog: http://paperskyscrapers.wordpress.com
Meds: 10 mg Abilify, 150mg Lamictal, 2mg Biperiden and 200mg Seroquel
#32
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Posted 13 September 2009 - 04:53 PM
Yup, I did.
I had always read that people with bp always cycle alot with antidepressants, so the doc and I talked about me getting off mine. Long story short--I need to stay on my venlafaxine. I was a mess without it.
I also harboured a suspicion that the topiramate I take wasn't really doing anything, so I decided to keep reducing the dose (it was at 300 mgs) until I was satisfied that it was doing something for me--or not.
I got down to 100 mgs, and noticed that I was doing better, with no dizziness and fingertip numbness. I tried to reduce more, but started to feel agitated and angry again--the usual symptoms of a mixed state coming on.
I guess the moral of the story is: if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
#33
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Posted 13 September 2009 - 06:02 PM
there have been countless trials with AD's, AAP's,AP's, hypnotics, etc. after the required amount of time to get up on therapeutic dose and subsequent failure to fix the ratty brain, i quit each and every one straight up. mixed in with the inefficient ones were the ones that drove me down further.
by no means do i believe that i can not be repaired. i just don't have the resources at hand to find out how. so i stay in a constant, unrelenting depression-better that alone than in the pit with raging side effects.
by no means do i believe that i can not be repaired. i just don't have the resources at hand to find out how. so i stay in a constant, unrelenting depression-better that alone than in the pit with raging side effects.
plenty meds, drugs and mental troubles in the past 40 years. no end in sight for depression.
eat a fish!
eat a fish!
#34
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Posted 14 September 2009 - 07:06 AM
I have many times
and each ime it makesthings worse mentaly stronged ztronger men, etting stable takes longer
and each ime it makesthings worse mentaly stronged ztronger men, etting stable takes longer
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I always wanted a happy ending... Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme,
and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change,
taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity."
-- Gilda Radner
and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change,
taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity."
-- Gilda Radner
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Current Meds
New Diagnosis Schizoefficttive
450mg lithium twice aday
45mg of Abiilify in the AM
Seroquel xr 400mgs am&pm
cogentin twice a day 2mg
60mgs of Geodon twice a day
100mg Wellbutrin
1mg twice a day klonopin
150mg twice a day primidone
100mg wellbutrin
eventually 100mg a day topomax
#35
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Posted 14 September 2009 - 10:14 AM
Yep.
Gone off my meds a couple of times.
Once because it was required for some medical testing.
More than once for the reasons you stated. I was tired of it, and convinced that the meds were making me sicker, not better.
Each and every time, I suffered terrible psychosis as a result.
It sucked.
I don't fancy doing it again.
I'm slowly attempting to wean off one drug, but I won't be completely med free for years, if ever.
Gone off my meds a couple of times.
Once because it was required for some medical testing.
More than once for the reasons you stated. I was tired of it, and convinced that the meds were making me sicker, not better.
Each and every time, I suffered terrible psychosis as a result.
It sucked.
I don't fancy doing it again.
I'm slowly attempting to wean off one drug, but I won't be completely med free for years, if ever.
"Bother", said Pooh, as he chambered another round...
Crazy Tranny Boy
What else is broken in my brain?
Another proselyte from the big ol' church of DBT.
Crazy Tranny Boy
What else is broken in my brain?
Another proselyte from the big ol' church of DBT.
#36
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Posted 02 November 2009 - 08:10 PM
It was a couple of years ago. I was taking Citalopram and Zyprexa. I decided that I had had enough of taking pills because I felt fine and thought I no longer needed them. I told my psych and although she didn't agree, she said it was my choice.
For a month or so I was ok but then everything started going backwards. My depression was worse than before I started taking Citalopram, although I can't say that I noticed any adverse effects with going off the Zyprexa considering that I don't even know why I was taking it in the first place (no one would tell me anything!).
For a month or so I was ok but then everything started going backwards. My depression was worse than before I started taking Citalopram, although I can't say that I noticed any adverse effects with going off the Zyprexa considering that I don't even know why I was taking it in the first place (no one would tell me anything!).
#37
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Posted 02 November 2009 - 09:20 PM
Ruby Red, on 02 November 2009 - 08:10 PM, said:
It was a couple of years ago. I was taking Citalopram and Zyprexa. I decided that I had had enough of taking pills because I felt fine and thought I no longer needed them. I told my psych and although she didn't agree, she said it was my choice.
For a month or so I was ok but then everything started going backwards. My depression was worse than before I started taking Citalopram, although I can't say that I noticed any adverse effects with going off the Zyprexa considering that I don't even know why I was taking it in the first place (no one would tell me anything!).
For a month or so I was ok but then everything started going backwards. My depression was worse than before I started taking Citalopram, although I can't say that I noticed any adverse effects with going off the Zyprexa considering that I don't even know why I was taking it in the first place (no one would tell me anything!).
I hope things ended up working out eventualy...did you go back up on the Citalopram or osme other anti-depressant?
Zyprexa can be used for a lot of different things....it's strange that no one explained why it was being used in your case. If you're not feeling harmed by not being on it, you can always hope that it will stay that way. That said, it might be helpful to figure out why the pdoc thought it should be used--that way you'd know what sort of symptoms to pay attention to.
some variation of: bipolar NOS, adjustment disorder w/ mixed mood and anxiety components; or MDD w/ anxiety. still a dx in progress, I guess. Some trauma elements.
current RXs: Effexor (150 mg), Ativan (0.5 mg am, 1 mg pm), Lamictal (250 mg); levothyroxine and birth control.
Past Rxs: zoloft (no significant effect); lexapro (went up to 20 mg but hit an anxiety/akathesia problem); wellbutrin; seroquel; ambien (worked wonderfully); Risperdal (great when needed, but gradually went off now that stability happened in order to decrease total drug use)
current RXs: Effexor (150 mg), Ativan (0.5 mg am, 1 mg pm), Lamictal (250 mg); levothyroxine and birth control.
Past Rxs: zoloft (no significant effect); lexapro (went up to 20 mg but hit an anxiety/akathesia problem); wellbutrin; seroquel; ambien (worked wonderfully); Risperdal (great when needed, but gradually went off now that stability happened in order to decrease total drug use)