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borderline's who hear voices?


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#1 Guest_bright eyes_*

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Posted 14 March 2008 - 01:20 AM

As a bordeliner have you been a part of those rare cases where you hear voices?

If so what are they like for you.

I hear voices and they tell me i am a horable person and that i dont deserve to live. Then give me a detailed plan on how i should kill myself.


#2 Rabbit37

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Posted 14 March 2008 - 07:57 AM

I do at times when I'm manic or mixed (I'm BP as well)... actually nothing singular, it's more like being in a crowded room, I hear lots of voices, and can only make out fragments of sentences. Nothing about me, really, it's conversation going on without me.
dx - BP, OCD and BPD, oh yeah, and some GAD as well
rx - lithium, risperidone, citalopram, vistaril and vitamins

#3 Iona_Viona

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Posted 16 March 2008 - 06:49 AM

In the past i have heard voices - normally what i heard was very abstract nothing to do with anything else in that environment at that time - sometimes there was reason to it but most of the time it was random - and if it was about harming myself it would normally happen at a time when i wasnt actually upset.

this wasnt often for me - i had a lot more visual hallucinations - i very frequently see things that arent really there or happening

but i am Bipolar as well and i always associated these symptoms as part of that
Current Dx: Bipolar, Borderline personality disorder, Anxiety & Major ED issues to complete the mix

Meds:Lithium, Wellbutrin, Valium, The occasional sleeping tablet & working my butt off 2 stay off Anti Psychotics
Past meds: Many many AD, Many AP, and Epilim

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#4 Laslo

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Posted 16 March 2008 - 08:12 AM

A horable person? What do YOU think about yourself? Are you agreed?

#5 trg247

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Posted 17 March 2008 - 06:11 PM

I do or did. Basically a voice that would encourage self destructive behavior and set off flashbacks. Seroquel took care of it for the most part. Not sure if the voice is linked to BPD or severe depression, doctors believe it is the latter.

take care
dx: severe MDD with psychotic features, BPD, C-PTSD, GAD, lengthy Self Harm history
rx: Seroquel 100mg 3 times daily + 50mg as needed, Temazapam
past rx: Nardil, Effexor, Wellbutrin, Remeron, Lithium, Zyprexa, Ativan, Paxil, Celexa, Klonopin, Xanax, Trazadone and a few others
alias: untreatableonline, untreatable

#6 blackbird

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Posted 22 March 2008 - 05:02 AM

I'm a borderline who hears voices. I've been displaying borderline traits since about the age of 14 and been treated by p-docs since then for a very classic case of BPD - black and white thinking, alternative idealisation and devaluation of people, impulsive self destructive and suicidal behaviour, fear of abandonment etc etc. Never heard voices until I was about 23 and this was the result of drug-induced psychosis (heavy hard-core cannabis abuse). Still hear voices, they've tried to pin it on my personality disorder but I don't believe it's part of BPD as BPD paranoia and voices is only transient, stress related paranoia. My paranoia and voices are severe and unrelenting so I have a separate psychotic disorder in addition to BPD that started life as drug-induced psychosis then transmogrified into something uglier and longer lasting without the drugs.
I STAND ALONE

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"For years one has to put up with the feeling that people do not care, really care, about one; then one day with growing alarm, one realises that it is God who does not care: and merely that he does not care, he does not care one way or the other"

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#7 openembrace

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Posted 30 March 2008 - 02:56 PM

Yes. I heard voices and I saw things. They told me to kill myself, that I was worthless, etc. I would see young children.
DX: who knows. who cares.

"And she could not hide her tears
They were sent to wash away those years.."

#8 Anodyne Oblivion

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Posted 01 April 2008 - 09:25 AM

Voices? No. I've experienced horror where when I closed my eyes, I saw horrific scenes that looked REAL. It wasn't like how your imagination flashes disturbing images before you, it was las if it was right in front of me and my eyes weren't closed.

Quite terrifying, and I hope it never happens again! *shudder*

For the record, I'm not officially diagnosed BPD, but when I was in therapy before, the woman I was seeing was fairly convinced of it. (high-functioning)
Fun.

Dx with BP II and ADHD because who wants to actually take the time to test a grown woman for an ASD?  No, that'd be stupid.  And I'm silly for even bringing it up.  Despite the fact that 2/3 of my siblings are on the spectrum. 

 

meds:

Buproprion

Focalin

(Buspirone?  Probably not gonna take it)

 


#9 Acz

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Posted 16 October 2008 - 05:09 AM

Never voices, but sounds that aren't supposed to be there. Like whistling and a car driving on gravel.

#10 papertrees

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Posted 21 November 2008 - 06:18 AM

I hear voices call my name and tell me to do horrible things to myself... I'm BPD with Schizoaffective..

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Diagnosis: Schizoaffective, Bipolar Type; Borderline personality disorder; Anorexia nervosa
Meds: Saphris 10mg, Lamictal 200mg, Valium 10mg.


#11 Rotten_Vivica

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Posted 21 November 2008 - 10:49 PM

I do at times when I'm manic or mixed (I'm BP as well)... actually nothing singular, it's more like being in a crowded room, I hear lots of voices, and can only make out fragments of sentences. Nothing about me, really, it's conversation going on without me.


Same with me. When I was younger the voices were mean to me.

Anya
Dx. Bipolar Disorder NOS, Social Anxiety, Borderline Personaily Disorder, PTSD
Past Dx: Impulse Control Disorder NOS [Self Injury], OCD, ADD
Current Meds; None


#12 GADGET_GIRL

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Posted 01 February 2009 - 11:23 PM

hey, i'm new here!

yeah i'm bpd who hears voices and sees people who arent real.

my psychiatrist says the voices and people are dissassociation, he says its not really anything to worry about but it does worry me.

the people scare me. i see people at home, so know they cant be rel, but when i'm out i dont know whos real or not and this stresss me out

the voices tell me i'm a bad person etc and tell me to do things to harm myself. my CPN says the voices are just my thoughts and it just sounds like someone else talking
diagnosis: bpd with dissociative states
meds: chlorpromazine, nortriptyline
past meds: fluoxetine, venlafaxine, citalopram, sertraline, mirtazapine, reboxetine, risperidone, loads of antiemetics, diazepam and more i cant remember!

#13 lostinthoughtandjaded

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Posted 14 February 2009 - 12:56 AM

the crowded room example is perfect for me...

admittedly, I'm bipolar, not BPD (as far as I know......) but I have 'voices' too... they're different people, at different times... sometimes they mimick people and voices I'm already familiar with, but mostly they're strangers... they always talk to each other, not to me, they never include me... and I can rarely make out the actual words... things go kind of Charlie Brown on me when I try and listen in... almost like, when I notice them there, I try and listen in, but it feels like I'm trying to listen to the neighbors talk through the plaster wall... I can only make out a word or two, a snippet of a phrase...

when I'm really manic, it turns into a shopping mall, and my own thoughts spin and churn along with a running soundtrack of at least two songs playing very loudly, either slipping from one song into another, or they both just overlap, and then around alllll of that, there's about a hundred people living out their day in my head, and I can't hear a goddamn thing...

It makes it really hard to concentrate on things sometimes......

OH- and Blackbird- you have the most incredibly delicious vocabulary!!!!!! I love reading your posts... although I hate when I read how upset you are... I wish you didn't have to go through so much... ;)

dx:  primarily severe anxiety & depression, bipolar (2)

history panic attacks, eating disorders, SI, impulsive behaviour

current:  Lamotrigine 200mg, Prozac 20mg, Clonazepam 0.5 mg
priors that performed reasonably well  Lamotrigine 150mg, Wellbutrin XL 150mg, Prozac 10mg, Clonazepam 1mg, Ativan 1mg sL for panic attacks, Seroquel 25mg for crisis situations

priors that failed miserably:  Celexa, Effexor (!#@! horrible)

 

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- YANN MARTEL


#14 iamzack

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Posted 04 March 2009 - 07:57 AM

I recently had a discussion with my boyfriend that is leading me to believe that I'm having some auditory and visual hallucinations... Same discussion I had with my exgirlfriend. Only she was much more tactful than him about it. She said "I believe you hear and see these things, but I don't believe they're there."

I'm not entirely sure what I'm hallucinating, though. The one I'm beginning to believe is hallucination because of what other people have said is that I hear people talking. Sometimes it's about me (and it's really not very nice) and sometimes it's just talking and I don't really hear specifically what's being said.

Boyfriend mentioned that I sometimes indicate that I see (very odd, but generally harmless) things that aren't there without appearing bothered by the oddness. I can't think of anything specifically, though.

I guess I'm really good at unconsciously rationalizing these things as perfectly normal so that I don't think about why no one else is reacting...
dx: bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, borderline personality disorder, attention deficit disorder, oppositional defiant disorder

rx: 100mg zoloft, 500mg depakote, 30mg vyvanse, misc. antibiotics

undiagnosed issues: ED-NOS, possible hallucinations

#15 Earthcalling

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Posted 05 March 2009 - 04:49 PM

I hear voices and noises all the time and when very stressed dissociate, hallucinate and have delusional thoughts.

So far I've come to realise mainly through CBT that most of the voices are aspects of myself talking to me. They can be negative - when I'm feeling down or anxious or about to crash - or can be positive to the point of grandiose - which is when I'm manic. I've learnt that the way I talk to myself is how my parents have talked to me - learnt talking patterns from childhood - especially the way they use to criticise or tell me off - I use the same language.

The other voices which are quite random and also occur when I'm having a conversation with someone I don't know. I've always had them and I'm so use to them now.

In the past I use to drink regularly as this was the only thing that seemed to muffle them however the next day they reappeared louder!

Then about 14 years ago I was camping out bush in Oz and I was sitting on a rock watching the sunrise and a truely breathtaking view and filled with the most incredible calm and peace I've ever felt, when I realised that my mind was completely silent. This has happened a few times over the years and I didn't know why until I went to a Buddhist centre and did a guided meditation with a nun. It was just focusing on your breath and everytime a thought or voice came up to observe it and let it go. It was the hardest - and still is - thing I've ever done but it really worked!!! I spoke to the nun about my voices and she was so kind and understanding as if she'd heard it before.

Also I've recently learnt through CBT if the voices become really loud and critical to challenge them. I have a whole list of questions including providing evidence for and against the thought/voice and what would I say to a best friend. When I do this it really does work and lowers the stress therefore my mood, so I don't feel so overwhelmed and crap about myself plus the voices quieten down.

The other I've learnt through NLP is that people talk/communicate to themselves in different ways. Some are visual or through touch/feel and others are auditory that is talk to themselves in their heads. The difficulty lies - I think - in figuring out which ones are just the normal you and which ones are the 'critical parent'.

Hope this helps in some way but just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

Hawk
Please don't suggest taking ADs when I talk about being depressed. I'm just letting off steam and find it more helpful if you suggest things to do eg. take a bath, tidy up, housework, go through my activity list... Cheers!!

I
nsanity is repeating the same thing over and over and expecting the result to be different....

The only sane response to an insane world is to lose your mind....(Bollywood Bride)

Do not adjust your mind, there's a fault in reality......(Alan Fletcher)

Dx : BPD, voices and hallucinations, General anxiety about everything and obsessive thinking
Meds - _-Zyprexa, Risperidone

#16 tiredoftherapy21

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Posted 06 March 2009 - 08:13 PM

I hear voices but it is due to my schizoaffective. and I also have bpd.
MY CRAZY LIST:: panic disorder w/ agoraphobia, chronic ptsd, schizoaffective disorder(depressive type), bpd, social phobia/anxiety, anorexia nervosa , dissociation
the reason I am in pain all the time::
fibromylagia, cervical dysplasia, scoliosis, hpv, endometriosis, lupus

medications I have tried:: effexor xr, zoloft, prozac, lithium, seroquel, cymbalta, lexapro, klonopin, wellbutrin sr, ativan , zyprexa, abilify, risperdal, wellbutrin xl , xanax, buspar, paxil, geodon, celexa, remeron, emsam patch
current meds:: luvox 50 mg 1x

#17 tryp

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Posted 06 March 2009 - 08:19 PM

Sometimes I hear static in my head. Also, sometimes I hear strings of random words, or someone's voice, especially someone I've been talking to a lot. Also, there are conversations going on in my head when I'm fucked up. Apparently it's a dissociative thing.

Not dx'd borderline either, but...let's just say my MI isn't so far removed

Diag-nonsense: complex PTSD w/ recurrent depression
Tx: Lamictal (250) + prazosin (7.5) + "therapy"


#18 cslinder

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Posted 26 March 2009 - 02:16 PM

whats it like when you hear them or see them.

i have mine when im trying to sleep. its like dreaming but im never really asleep. i have them almost every night in i just get up missing chuncks of time. the longest being about 3 hours and when i snap out of it i can only remember the last little bit about what i was seeing.

i havent had a good sleep in almost 9 months the last one that was really good was when i was sent to the hospital, and then when i first started cutting again. (after a 7 year hiatus).

#19 LikeMinded

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Posted 26 March 2009 - 02:58 PM

whats it like when you hear them or see them.


Another one for the "crowded room" sounds here. Maybe a bit more muffled and subtle, more like a TV on or a conversation going on behind the door. I have a nasty habit of mistaking my washing machine running for people talking. This is probably due more to my autism-spectrum issues, but maybe BPD plays in (or BPDs tend to have more autism spectrum-resembling issues, if my family is any indication).

i have mine when im trying to sleep. its like dreaming but im never really asleep. i have them almost every night in i just get up missing chuncks of time. the longest being about 3 hours and when i snap out of it i can only remember the last little bit about what i was seeing.


I think this one is relatively normal, even in those without sleep or personality disorders. As I go into twilight sleep, I start having these weird psychotic thoughts and hear those muffled voices (this time more like people behind me trying to get my attention). Usually I manage to fall asleep right through them. My pdoc has speculated that this is part of my narcolepsy issues as well as my REM behavioral sleep disorder (i.e., acting out dreams). I'm not sure how REM-BSD has anything to do with this directly, but it seems that the 2mg clonazepam I take every night for it helps with the nightly voice-hearing issues. Talk to your pdoc if you think a medication might help.

i havent had a good sleep in almost 9 months the last one that was really good was when i was sent to the hospital, and then when i first started cutting again. (after a 7 year hiatus).


That one could be the meds, better see the pdoc about it, if the issue is getting to this point....

CAUTION: I'm a graduate computational medicine/allied health information student, and NOT a licensed clinician of any sort in any part of the world.  I can come up with lots of algorithms, generalities, and statistics but cannot provide specific medical advice for you!  You, along with your healthcare provider/pdoc/tdoc/etc. are the best decision makers for what is best!

 

Me: MDD, AD/HD, Asperger's/HFA/PDD-NOS/WTF, REM behavioral disorder/misc. sleep issues, some variant of PTSD... toss in hypothyroidism, post-meningitis-related Parkinson's disease/tremor, early stage pulmonary hypertension from a connective tissue disorder that wants me dead before age 60, and a few misc. manly hormone issues, and you'll get a few insights on where that PTSD came from.

 

Now on: Cymbalta, mirtazapine, oxybutynin, clonazepam, lamotrigine, clonidine, levothyroxine, metformin, Testim.  As Velvet Elvis implied, I sound like a freakin' maraca salesman when I go through airport security.


#20 cslinder

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Posted 26 March 2009 - 03:50 PM

i was just diagnosed at the end of last month and the doc's dont want to give me any thing as of now.

I think this one is relatively normal, even in those without sleep or personality disorders. As I go into twilight sleep, I start having these weird psychotic thoughts and hear those muffled voices (this time more like people behind me trying to get my attention). Usually I manage to fall asleep right through them.


i have had regular dreams but these are unusual i never get to REM sleep always on the border of sleep and awake. like some one is trying to talk to me while im trying to fall asleep. then i snap (imidatly awake and i wont be able to even try to going back to sleep. i just lie there wide awake untill the alarm clock goes off) i wish that i could sleep a sound night but untill i can lay with my wife again im destin to be awake.....





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