[Changed]

Today was my doctor appt. It went well I guess, She perscribed Lamictal, Abilify, Neurontin, and Ativan (as needed not every day)

I really wasn't so keen on the abilify because most people find it say it activates their anxiety (which is the last thing I need). I took a dose today and have felt like I have the worst flu ever. I'm not going to quit though because I really dont have any other choice with as suicidal as I have been. Maybe its a good thing I feel so bad physically, it distracts me from the circus in my head.

I'm keeping a medication log and hopefully my new doctor will help me to sort all this out since I can't see my old pdoc anymore. I have to start calling around tommorow trying to find a doctor and I am already sick to my stomach about having to start all over.

I still feel absoulutely flat and just dead inside I wish there was something I could take to make that go away but I guess I will just have to keep living like this until then.

Wish me luck guys!

[dianthus]

did she take you off of the celexa and wellbutrin cold turkey again?

if so, this may be why you're feeling like you have the flu.

i really think an off-post inpatient hospital is where you need to be right now because your doctor is not helping you. the hospital will also find you a pdoc.