Ashlie Freeman, on 04 December 2009 - 01:07 AM, said:
AuburnSunshine, on 26 October 2005 - 09:54 AM, said:
Concerta is extended/time released ritalin.
I'm such a nervous wreck about seeing my pdoc this morning...didn't sleep at all last night. Of course I can't tell her that because then she'' say "hmm...yes...just like I've said you're bipolar and you need a mood stabilizer."
The only way "we" got to a diagnosis of bipolar for me is that when I go in to talk with her I DO talk fast...because I know I only have 30 minutes (or less it seems much of the time!) and I want to get everything out so "we" can get the right medications for me. However, it's because I talk so quickly when I'm in her office that she says I'm bipolar.
I keep telling her that I just don't think that's the case...1) I've never had a manic (even mild) state that wasn't because of a special reason, i.e., acknowledgement for a project, etc. But she'll say "and how did you feel when that happened." When I say that I felt great...my self esteem was up, etc....she goes back to this bipolar shit.
I've been studying bipolar as much as I can (which pisses her off royally) and I haven't had any kind of a manic state for four days in a row...that's what the DSM says for Bipolar II. All of this horrible, horrible depression began after my parents' suicide and then the loss of my life as I had always known it. I've always hoped I would "snap out of it" but haven't so I've accepted it as a part of my life for now.
She won't listen to the depression being caused by PTSD...says it was there way before they died. But you guys have helped me realize that she doesn't know squat...she never knew me before their deaths and so how can she say that?!?!?
I never had manic states before - or even after - their deaths so how can I be bipolar?
I'll admit that I probably had had ADD throughout my life...but I always was able to keep it under control until the depression hit. So much of what is ADD is also depression...
I've got to stop crying before I see her...I have to get myself calmed down and under control so I can go into her office as the mature, assertive woman I AM...and not allow her to bully me because of her insecurities.
I can't tell you enough how much it means to me that you read my post and responded. Thank you so very much.
Okay, I felt like I needed to respond to your post. I was diagnosed with ADHD, at age 8. My parents didn't believe in meds, so my entire life we have done the (self -help) treatment. It wasn't until after I had my daughter (at age 25), that the stress with the ADD, pushed me beyond my ability to (self control). I want to say that I have always been a semi-fast talker ( my SO said I needed to say things in paragraphs, when men only have the need to say the same things in 1-2 sentences.) That's just men, and women. I just started Concerta, and feel as though it hasn't been the best match for me either, and am planning on switching to adderal. I have been in your situatio, where I feel like i have sooo much to say in a little about of time and have a "word vomit" alot of people stop hearing after the first minute and ALL the hear is BLA BLA BLA.... What helped me better communicate what I needed, without coming across as a patient that needs to be highly medicated for my excitement about the subject, is that I wrote out my concerns/ questions on a peice of paper. I met with my doctor, and (in 3 min) I stated this:
Dr G, (I'm not great with saying what I mean within the short time we have here today, so I put on paper what I need from our meeting today.)
(FIRMLY STATE) Before we begin, I know we have alot of things we need to cover today. And I want to make sure that we both make the most out of our time we have today. I want to let you know that, I have concerns and/or ?'s that I need to be addressed today.(simply stated) Although I understand our time is limited, and I think we can both agree that our shared goal today is to cover what is and is not working, possible solutions, and what we need to do to get me where I need to be. I would like for us to begin, by going through our "regular" Q&A, regarding my therapy, and I would like to give you the answers to your questions to medically evaluate our progress. However, I would like for us to try and discuss the things on my list, and visit my concerns/or questions, so that I may better understand what I need to do after we leave here today. The the end "result" ( ie. diagnosis, prescription(changes), or plan) is something through understanding, that will have me leaving here today with the confidence and understanding (WHY) in the "plan" we move forward with.
etc... etc... Make it your own words, point is.... OUR weekness is saying things in paragraphs, and no one else can understand our ranting... You have to be prepared before you go to the doctor and FORCE them to answer your concerns, without sounding like a rambling patient. We all do it, and the only way you can take control is to take it in your own hands write it OUT and SAY what you mean CLEARLY, and if the Doctor can't address your issues, you need to find a new DOCTOR!!! Trust me they are out there, and you pay enough for them to address your needs, (JUST make them clear) and you will find the answers you need and deserve!
I hope this helps,