[Velvet Elvis]

This had been the case for a while, it's just more clearly stated now.

If everyone were to go around removing their posts from old threads the would quickly become unintelligible.

If there is something of a personal nature that you regret posting on down the road, let us know and we'll be glad to remove it.

[reddog]

This post has been edited by reddog: 09 November 2005 - 03:47 PM

[Supergwen]

I would be more open to tacklehugs than true cyber hugs.  They have the violence that I hold so dear. 

On a side note, I have been a hugging machine lately.  I feel the need for physical support, considering I ain't gettin' any.  Sigh.  Also went to an NA meeting on Tuesday and those people are hugging MACHINES.  Anyone in need of hugs should check it out.  You can always lie and say you are an addict even if you aren't. 

[Velvet Elvis]

My main problem with cyberhugs is that people use them instead of actualy trying to say somthing meaningful.  I went into more detail on this issue in the chat rules a while back:

Quote

It is the opinion of many of us that cyberhugs are real fucking lame. They are not forbidden but the right is reserved to make fun of anyone who uses them. If you want to communicate, please use words. Just as cybershit doesn't smell, cyberhugs communicate nothing other than your poor mastery of linguistic communication.

It's not the cyberhug that bugs me so much as the fact that too often people use it as a way to get out of sitting and thinking about their responses.

You've never been on a forum where no matter what you say they default response is ***hugz***?

Elvis:>  I just killed seven of my coworkers
Lam3r:>  ;-( ***hugz***

fuck a bunch of that.

[faith]

[Sunshine]

I think I'm just now starting to appreciate your humor. I'm a little slow.

[ncc1701]

Heya,

Until crazyboards I was going a different kind of crazy looking for someone who *got it.*

Elvis:>  I just killed seven of my coworkers
Lam3r:>  ;-( ***hugz***

That's *it.*

So sick of the pretend hugs.  If your arms are long enough, hug me for real.  If your arms are not long enough, thanks anyway: words work better long-distance..

--ncc--

[Sam56]

Seems to me the trouble with applying the same rule to everyone is that not everyone is the same. While it may very well be true that some folks tend to resort to a quick cyber-hug, rather than a well thought out verbal response, I firmly believe that C-Hs serve a purpose.

This somehow reminds me of the way I have recently been forced to pay for gas before filling up my tank. It's not that I have ever in my life driven off without paying, nor that the majority of people have done anything like that, it's simply that a very few have spoiled things for the rest of us.

If I ever post a vapid response filled with nothing better than an idiotic, meaningless cyber-hug, then I would expect to be chastised, or even banished from the boards. But if I can separate the wheat from the chaff and figure out who can appreciate a virtual hug from those who would resent it, then it's going to be tough for me not to offer something that just might brighten another person's day. I now offer the folowing for the clear minority who would appear to at least not be diametrically opposed to receiving it:

{{{{Supergwen}}}}}
{{{{Sunshine}}}}}

One of the above hardly knows me at all, but I'm pretty sure she'd appreciate a warm hug. The other one knows me a bit better, but it's been a while since I've run into her here on the boards. The point being that when it comes to cyber-hugging, one size does not fit all, and one rule doesn't fit all, either.

When I first joined the old CrazyTalk site I was impressed by the latitude offered to those of us who trod the boards, but it seems to me our freedom of expression has shrunk a bit of late. I'm not trying to rock any boats, nor am I trying to buck the system. I'm just trying to find a place where a less-than-perfectly-well adjusted person can express himself without running into a wall of rejection.

Sam (of the Oklahoma variety.)

[Becca]

Go go gadget arms!

(My ringtone is Inspector Gadget, consequently I sing it to myself and think about it often during the day.  This makes my life better.)

[Velvet Elvis]

Sam56, on Nov 12 2005, 05:48 PM, said:

When I first joined the old CrazyTalk site I was impressed by the latitude offered to those of us who trod the boards, but it seems to me our freedom of expression has shrunk a bit of late. I'm not trying to rock any boats, nor am I trying to buck the system. I'm just trying to find a place where a less-than-perfectly-well adjusted person can express himself without running into a wall of rejection.

Sam (of the Oklahoma variety.)
<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I never said cyber hugs are forbidden and hope I didn't imply it.  What I was trying to express was that we're not like most of the warmfuzzybunnyhuggy sites out there because we stress people talking about stuff rather than simply offering shallow comfort.  There is more comfort in understanding than there is in a {{{{{{{{}}}}}}}.

The provisional UA is something I slapped together in an hour to replace what Jerod took down.  I'm working on coming up with stuff that's less ambiguous.

[Cerberus]

Sam56, on Nov 12 2005, 06:48 PM, said:

Seems to me the trouble with applying the same rule to everyone is that not everyone is the same. While it may very well be true that some folks tend to resort to a quick cyber-hug, rather than a well thought out verbal response, I firmly believe that C-Hs serve a purpose.

...

if I can separate the wheat from the chaff and figure out who can appreciate a virtual hug from those who would resent it, then it's going to be tough for me not to offer something that just might brighten another person's day. I now offer the folowing for the clear minority who would appear to at least not be diametrically opposed to receiving it:

...

When I first joined the old CrazyTalk site I was impressed by the latitude offered to those of us who trod the boards, but it seems to me our freedom of expression has shrunk a bit of late. I'm not trying to rock any boats, nor am I trying to buck the system. I'm just trying to find a place where a less-than-perfectly-well adjusted person can express himself without running into a wall of rejection.

Sam (of the Oklahoma variety.)
<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sam -

I think there's some confusion here... If you re-read the rules, you'll find that there is no rule against using cyberhugs, or any other specific mode of expression.  Certain boards have more specific restrictions related to the MI condition being discussed, but you'll find that in the board introduction, usually pinned to the top.  Velvet Elvis' point (in context) was that when you post here, you should expect that those who respond to you are going to feel free (and be encouraged) to speak their mind and not respond with thoughtless expression in the way that cyberhugs are often used.  And, conversely, you are expected and encouraged to post just as freely -- even if that includes thoughtfully applied {{{hugzz}}}.  What VE is trying to say is that here on Crazyboards it's Katie-bar-the-door for free expression, as long as you don't become abusive, and you should expect answers you didn't expect.

We mods are committed to making sure that no wall of rejection is ever raised here.  If it does, I, for one, will ram my head into it until it falls.


Cerberus

[Sam56]

V-E & Cyberus,

Thanks for taking the time to spell things out for me. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't necessary for people to occasionally clarify things of this nature. I was about 24 years old before someone offered me my first hug (real life, or otherwise) and this altered the course my life has taken ever since.

It seems that a few old CrazyTalkers got lost in the shuffle when it came time to migrate to the new CrazyBoards, and their shared mantra was 'Change is bad.' Not sure I share that sentiment, but I do crave stability, and seemingly constant change is hard on me.

When I was two years old my parents went through an ugly divorce, and when I was about 11 they did it again (after rejoining their lives.) But it wasn't until I turned 13 and they divorced for the final time that my ability to accept change was truly crushed and thrown aside like a big heap of discarded garbage.

I know that what is going on between the CrazyMeds and CrazyBoards sites needs to be resolved and finalized. But this is utter hell on a person whose parents married and divorced each other THREE times.

Sorry if my voice seems to be a negative one. It's just that what is going on here has triggered memories that are very tough to deal with. Thanks for taking the time to explain your collective positions. I look forward to the day when stability once again rules the boards, and I truly hope that day comes some day soon.

Sam

[CrazySoprano]

What if the rules said something like this:

Quote

We don't have a policy against cyber-hugs, but we do ask that they be accompanied by a well thought-out post.  If you post like Lam3r here...

Elvis:>  I just killed seven of my coworkers.
Lam3r:>  {{{hugz}}}

we reserve the right to make fun of you.  A lot.

Elvis, you didn't *really* kill seven of your coworkers, did you?  Cause if you did, the other admins should probably back away slowly so no one gets hurt.

~CS
a fan of hugs in any form since 1982

[realitytest]

CrazySoprano, on Nov 12 2005, 09:59 PM, said:

What if the rules said something like this:

Quote

We don't have a policy against cyber-hugs, but we do ask that they be accompanied by a well thought-out post.  If you post like Lam3r here...Elvis:>  I just killed seven of my coworkers.
Lam3r:>  sad.gif {{{hugz}}}

Ha!  Reminds me of the Southern "rule" that you can say whatever you please about someone as long as accompanied by the disclaimer ""God bless him/her". 

As in "Uncle Billie, God bless him, IS the biggest asshole who ever walked the face of the Earth."

[revlow]

A variation of that is "Bless her heart"...

"Cousin Ruthie, bless her heart, doen't have a brain in her head."