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About confused

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    bundle of nerves
  • Birthday May 1

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    Southern California
  • Interests
    very amateur writing

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  1. We changed from a ppo to an hmo this year. It is cheaper and our primary docs are in the system. So, i go to see a dental specialist for a follow up who takes the hmo, but i need a pre authorization. His assistant said my pcp can make it retro (back dated). So, i keep the appt. i finally get ahold of pcp and she says it will take a few days to go through. Now, i am not sure if i am going to be stuck with a huge bill. I Should have cancelled.
  2. Medication for fatigue?

    I Will mention it when i see pdoc. I see him soon and dont talk to sleep disorder doc for a month.
  3. I have sleep apnea, but when i wear my contraptions (mouthguard and side sleeping belt) i breathe fine. But, i am still overly tired. If i have a chance, i sleep. I saw the dentist that gave me the mouthguard. He said i should go back to the sleep disorders dr and see if she can give me medication to "pep" me up. I made the appt for a month from now. I would love to have something to help with farigue. No one has offered any kind of medication before, so i don't know if she will.
  4. I tried reading something in an excited voice. I did not realize how bad it was until I heard it played back. It was monotone. I think for me it is part of the illness
  5. I have been pretty lucky, but still. I have been released when i was still unwell and unable to take care of myself. I was in a hospital, once, that was like a warehouse. I was obviously hallucinating and was ignored. They even forgot to give me my meds. No one noticed until the pdoc saw me wandering, trying to find out where the voices were coming from, and had them bring me to her. there was a case here where a man was complaining of arm pain and was refused a medical dr. When he finally was examined they found his arm was broken when they restrained hin. I think people get burnt out and start seeing us as problems they don't want to have to deal with. They lose empathy.
  6. Music helps me. I have songs on my ipad and play it before and it makes it easier for me. Part of showering that I don't like are to deal with drying my hair and getting cold. I am telling myself i don't have to get my hair very wet and just wash off my body tomorrow. Brushing my teeth is bad, but not like the shower. I fall asleep and forget.
  7. I struggle. I am haunted by my past. I am having trouble doing things I want to and it makes me miserable. The medication thing I have accepted. I try to decrease the dosages but I always end up having to go back.
  8. I know the spoons/day idea. I have a lot of fatigue and don't feel like I have many spoons (I don't know how to estimate). Taking a shower takes a lot out of me. Many times I want to drink coffee to perk up, but I am too tired to make it or even drink. I can work (15 hrs/week) but the stress is effecting me. I can walk the dog but it takes effort. I don't think I have enough spoons. I hate when people ask what I did over the weekend. I slept all day does not seem like a good answer. My symptoms can be hard on me, too. I just got through an issue with intrusive thoughts. It was draining. Now, I feel depressed and I think part of it is just recovering. I tell people I sleep a lot. I think only my family understand how much, and my daughter thinks I am lazy. My son sees me going to dr appts, taking meds and he worries. I have to reassure him they are just regular visits. He knows i have a mental illness,. He is 16 and does not really understand Anxiety plagues me the most. It takes up time worrying and leads to negative thinking and then depression. I have not really been having psychotic symptoms. (I think). I catch myself thinking there are messages or I hear someone call my name when I am alone, but I don't get absorbed by it. Those don't take many spoons. It is just something I notice. I am sorry. I did not answer your question. (if you just wanted people with sz and not sza to answer, I apologize)
  9. Hi everyone. I am better than I was, but still not great. I was having repetitive intrusive thoughts, that were terrible. Now, I am tense. Before, I wondered if I wanted to live, Now, I just don't feel like doing anything. I am stressed about work. I don't know if it is too much. The work is not so hard, but I have not been doing well since i started.
  10. Thank you jt my pdoc had tried to explain to me how abilify works differently on dopamine at different dosages. I think he just confused confused
  11. How Do You Feel THIS MOMENT in Time?

    It takes me forever to wake up. I am okay. I can make it through the day and no one will know how sad I am inside. I just have to put on the mask. I work in the mental health field and I worry that if I start having symptoms it will show. My husband is out of town so I have to keep it together when I get home, too.
  12. A couple of comments. I think abilify is not working as well for me. My pdoc has been slowly tweaking my dosage up. I am at 30mg which is the max he goes, from 10mg to control intrusive thoughts. I was on this dosage before, but I was very symptomatic and it worked. My thought was that I am getting progressively worse. It makes me feel better to think it may be the med. As far as anti-depressant effect, I believe that is in combo with an ssri and low dosages 2-5mg ( I can search if you want) Seroquel did not work well for me except controlling agitation, but I was on lower doses. Cheese please take care of yourself. Does your doc know how depressed you are? I want to try rexulti, too, but I don't think my pdoc is up to making any major changes. I am starting to max out on my meds.
  13. How Do You Feel THIS MOMENT in Time?

    melancholy (no reason)
  14. Coffee and Cancer?

    oh, no. I am dependent on coffee to function.
  15. I heard some voices talking quietly in my head, not to me directly. I was chalking it up to the normal noise in my head. Then I realized the clock radio was on very low. I was hearing the djs. Feeling better than I have in a while. Not great, but not depressed