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About whendovescry

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  1. Thank you, whoever you are out there. It's just not good for MI and it can cause it. It's not for us. Peace out.
  2. Thanks for replying, Gearhead and yeah, good idea cuz something has to be done. I really feel addicted and have anxiety first and foremost but also psychotic features. Thanks for the reply. EDIT:Just read the article and yeah, it rings true for me that cannabis caused my psychosis .
  3. Hi, I'm on 5 different psych meds but I smoke so much weed I wonder if it makes the anti-psychotics ineffective. And I have such a hard time smoking less, I am legal, medical card and that makes it so easy. I get it prescribed for anxiety. I feel it just causes anxiety. I really hate this drug which is supposedly harmless and non-addictive because for me thats not true. It's messing with my life. I can't stop smoking. Sorry for the rant, but it was good to just say this. Fuck THC!
  4. Hey OP with the coke issues. I don't think this is the place to talk about your situation. if you go to bluelight.org and once there click on the dark side. They will be understanding and no judgment. But yeah, coke does not mix with psych meds and even acceptance forums like bluelight will tell you that.
  5. hey there, yes kratom is a good idea but it can NOT be smoked or snorted. Thats crazy talk. You can buy the powder online and put it in veggie caps. It has a mild pain killing effect. To your other point: how would you find fentanyl? it's not like anyone advertise "heres vicodin laced with...". I understand it's frustrating. I can't recommend buying oxycodone or vic's. hey Geared, I wasn't thinking, Im sorry. good luck.
  6. Thanks, Melissa, for me it's a deal breaker. I'm in a situation where I have to stay on psych meds, my diagnosis is bipolar but I have been diagnosed SZA in the past. Those links you posted gave me a lot of great info, again thanks.
  7. Hi, I am very interested in this. Wondering: can you do Ketamine infusions while on psych meds or do you have to go off meds in order to do it? I have TRD and am just surviving, not living. I could not find your FB group with those search words. Thanks for any info. Peace.
  8. so true. they do not get it. "I'm fine, thanks"
  9. Binge Eating Medication

    Very few doc's will prescribe Vyvanse as it's an amphetamine and a powerful one at that.HIgh abuse potential, psychosis inducing etc I would personally love to be on vyvanse and take it responsibly since my fatigue/anhedonia has lasted 8 months now. but if you have a doc who's willing, it's worth a try IMO.
  10. I fully agree with this. it might feel wicked good in the moment but having gone through more than a full year of mania/psychosis in 2014-15 I'm just now stabilizing. the depression can be bone crushing and I might wish for something else but everything you mentioned (almost death too) happened to me during that year and I lost all my closest friends and allies. they couldn't take me anymore and when I did crash I couldn't take it and started drinking/taking benzo's and that just prolonged the hell. I really think i have "learned" to never stop meds again!! I still feel heavy guilt for the pain I caused my family. I try hard these days to be in acceptance and not regret my whole sorry life. MI has defined me and I feel its my fault for letting it.
  11. What are you listening to NOW?

    my bloody valentine and Bowies last album.
  12. I'm in school now for the first time in 20 years ,since I got sick. I used to be a straight A student etc.intellectual,read tons of books. over the last 20 years I've been on every med possible,IP,IOP,a living hell. I'm supposed to be good now. I'm not. I struggle with comprehension of the material,have to read everything multiple times,got a C! it's so embarrassing.I feel brain damaged.BP changed the whole game.
  13. I normally don't respond to threads but this is how I feel all the time, have felt for more than a year.even though no serious symptoms,I feel lonely , insecure and I can't for the life of me concentrate on school.
  14. I read your thing and I relate so much. I'm living in hell too.I have an 8 yr old and a wife I need to be strong for. I can't get out of bed.I sleep about 16 hrs a day.on a ton of meds that does not work. I'm 44 and ,been living with MI for 20 yrs and can barely remember having a life, I've recently been through a year of psychosis and Im supposed to be " well again" now.I'm not. I'm in school again but can't concentrate and it's just embarrasing. I don;t know what to do. good luck to you!