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About ananke

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  1. I've got a trauma-versary coming up in about a month, I hope yours just goes and is as manageable as possible. Glad you're able to see your therapist on that day/around that time though, hopefully that'll be a good anchor. Taking the day off sounds like a constructive way to face it
  2. Tbh this post would probably be better in the relationship forum, I don't quite understand why you are posting in the personality disorder forum. Sounds like you are having a rough time though.
  3. What? You were helpful, I was just pointing out that I was aware that learning disorders are not personality disorders
  4. Without wanting to be rude, I was aware of this. The development of my PD's is linked to the fact that I was undiagnosed with dyspraxia. I will look into better coping mechanisms though.
  5. I've been wondering if there is something other than just dyspraxia, but it's not a huge priority and I can't afford to be re-tested for what would really be a shot in the dark. I've been advised against taking psych meds, because a lot of the anxiety and whatnot is rooted in personality disorders :/ I have grip problems so one minute, the glass in my hand is fine, the next it's in pieces on the floor. Figuring out the order things should go in is also difficult, especially with short term memory problems. Like if someone rattles off three different tasks I need to do, I'll maybe remember two of them fine and get stuck on the third, if I remember it at all. By treatment do you mean exercises, or medication?
  6. There are still some triggers of mine that will send me spiralling down. To be honest, doing the whole desensitisation thing helped with a lot of the other triggers. As in, being in therapy and gradually introducing these triggers in a way that I could see coming, then trying to bring me to a place of relative relaxation. I try to distract myself if it's really bad, but I also try to keep my normal routines in. If nothing else, it minimises any 'damage control' after the trigger eases up.
  7. Since I was diagnosed with dyspraxia I feel like a whole chunk of my life I completely ignored now makes sense, and with that comes some clarity into the roots of all my anxiety. The trouble is, that root isn't something I can fix or change. Does anyone else with learning disorders (don't know what the phrase is in the US) have anxiety caused by their LD? Struggles I'm having- Social skills or lack thereof. Some of the social anxiety is because I am actually finding people difficult. I don't always understand their motives, or my speech is funny (dropping or changing sounds, forgetting words mid-sentence), I find even small groups of people overwhelming and large groups almost unbearable. Before my diagnosis I stuck it out because I assumed I was just weird, but now everything almost feels worse because I know what it is. Like a lot of girls/women with LD's I think I present far more socially adept than I actually am because girls are more 'emotionally intelligent'. Anxiety over job performance or work. Forgetting to do assignments or that I'm scheduled in at work is probably the quickest way to get me to have a panic attack. I struggle to organise and manage time but I feel like I overcompensate with the anxiety, so I spend days OCD-checking work schedules or even meeting up with a friend. Instead of having a functional system there's a doubly dysfunctional system which mimics a functional one, if that makes any sense. Finding it difficult to cope with new situations I'm not either fully in control of, or fully educated in. I'm trying to look for a job (which worries me for so many reasons) and also contemplating dating again (after a former abusive relationship) and both feel very over my head at the moment because I don't have much experience at either. Well, I have job experience, but each workplace is different and has different structures and rules and people and blah blah blah. Unless I have a literal manual with every step or question laid out for me, it's difficult. I get the whole 'just having to throw myself out there' but every time I've done that, I got burned badly, so it isn't the most helpful advice. I feel like I've made this post before but can I remember? No
  8. Glad to hear things are looking good! Strokes are scary but hopefully the worst is over
  9. I'm so sorry jt, strokes can be serious but there are a lot of treatments and support out there to help any lasting side effects. Recovery trajectories from strokes are improving more and more. Hope both of you are doing well
  10. If you pushed hard enough would you be able to access a therapist or pdoc? I don't think nurses can diagnose you and it might be worth getting it assessed. MH professionals should know better than 'oh you look fine guess everything's ok then'. Sounds like you've had nothing but unhelpful judgement so far
  11. Personality disorders are frequently co-morbid with other personality disorders, but that doesn't necessarily mean you have other PD's. I have OCPD and BPD (not AvPD sorry) and from personal experience, a lot of my anxieties stem from the OCPD. It sort of fuels everything. Perhaps getting an assessment could help, at least it might give you an idea as to what's actually causing these feelings. Sorry, I can't tell you whether it sounds like AvPD but it sounds like it's causing you a lot of grief regardless
  12. If you trust your team it's worth bringing up. Having insight and perspective into thoughts and feelings that distress you is a good thing, IMO, but I understand the fear that it might not get taken seriously.
  13. It kind of sounds like she's not confused, she's messing with your head. To be honest, your sexuality and gender presentation seem to be an excuse to act like an arsehole. You say she's manipulative, and it seems like this is an extension of that. Sorry, I don't want to be mean but she should not be treating you this way. You can't make her accept anything, since she is sort of holding the cards in this situation.
  14. I'm going to politely disagree with the 'PD's are easy to solve permanently' statement. Sorry, tone is difficult to communicate online so I don't want to be rude. Anyway, I think it's definitely a good aim to look to minimise harmful symptoms and find ways of coping, but that doesn't mean it's necessarily something that will resolve itself completely, and I think it can set people up to have high expectations and feel like they've failed. As for the last part of the message, there are always going to be people who won't take responsibility for their actions. This isn't really a symptom of BPD. A lot of the generalisations about BPD are straight up stereotypes that hurt a lot of borderlines, especially when those assumptions are repeated by professionals. I haven't found many places that do DBT or schema therapies here but sounds like a good option! Heard a lot of people do DBT
  15. VeganJesus, those meds often help people manage complex and sometimes life threatening conditions. They aren't 'driving energy', they are helping people to be alive and do stuff? I don't even take psychiatric meds and even I know this. As for 'horrible treatment' and 'murder', you'll notice a lot of people on this thread make a point to say they try to eat ethically as much as possible, like getting free range eggs. Humans are not in fact designed to be raw vegan. Some people can chose to be, but it isn't for everyone. Some folks literally cannot eat raw vegan diets due to medical, dietary or resource restrictions. The system is fairly shit, but just telling everyone to blanket-vegan their diets is not the solution. Kind of convinced you're a troll but w/e I've got a stomach bug and nothing else to do. This is a place for mentally ill people, not shame and judgement on lifestyle choices. Using loaded emotional language about food is not appropriate for a website that includes people who have/had eating disorders.