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About aura

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    she's a cruel mistress, and a bargain must be made

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  1. I'm diagnosed as schizoaffective bipolar type and I still post here. When my comments have more to do with psychosis I post in the schizophrenia section, and when they have more to do with mood I post here.
  2. I'm going in today for an evaluation. Don't have a clue what's going to happen.
  3. I'm leaving my program in Cairo a week early because my mental health is deteriorating. I was wondering if any of you thought this situation might require evaluation at the hospital. I'm experiencing some dissociation, like thinking the world isn't real and I've already killed myself. I'm sensing the evil entity that is trying to kill me by putting suicidal thoughts into my head, but fortunately I haven't had too many such thoughts. I'm depressed and feel hopeless, and related to that I'm having self-harm urges, possibly even suicidal thoughts. Should I go get evaluated at the hospital when I get home? Or try to stick it out on my own?
  4. Lack of motivation for pretty much everything... food, work, friends. I power through and try to be social anyway, but it's tough.
  5. I'm depressed, which makes everything the entity says to me feel so much more reasonable. Things are falling apart.
  6. What do you think is best? Hospital can be a difficult call, but sometimes it's the right place to be.
  7. Newly Diagnosed

    Latuda caused insomnia for me too. Nixed that pretty quickly. I hope you find a med regime that works for you soon.
  8. I stupidly gave some random guy on the street my number. Now I blocked it so he can't call/text me. I keep worrying he'll track me down and kill me. He seemed nice at the time.
  9. Anyone else get paranoid that their drinks or food will be spiked with poison? Sometimes even if I look away from my food for a moment I worry if I should eat it or not, in case it was poisoned. I've been forcing myself to push through and eat the food anyway, but it does a number on my anxiety levels.
  10. I used to get manic in fall/early winter, but thankfully my meds appear to be working and no sign of it this year.
  11. It's great that you're persevering, @Angerr. I'm meeting Egyptian pdoc tomorrow to talk about my issues with paranoia. I'm super nervous because I don't want to take more meds.
  12. I did shrooms while manic and it did nothing to stop that episode. It was a really positive experience though.
  13. Trileptal for mania?

    I was given trileptal during a period of acute psychosis, actually. I'm not convinced that it does anything at all.
  14. Increased energy is central to the diagnosis of any kind of mania, as far as I understand it.
  15. Egypt pdoc put a name to how I've been feeling recently... suspicious. Can't tell if it's the OCD or psychosis or both.