ladyboss

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About ladyboss

  • Rank
    Daddy's Lil' Monsta
  • Birthday 07/24/96

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  • Gender
    Unicorn
  • Location
    Texas
  • Interests
    You see, madness....is a lot like gravity - all it takes is a little push.

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  1. i really cannot stress enough that you need to not wean yourself off medication without a doctors OK. it's really not a good idea, a lot of people here agree with that and i know it. it's just not safe.
  2. to add onto this comment; since this is your first flight? you can't have your phone's cellular on. that's why phone's have airplane mode, but it's best you just turn it off. that being said, you won't have internet on the plane. some apparently offer internet if you pay for it, but when we went to florida when i was 16 they didn't offer it. so a DVD player, an ipod, ipad, something with music or that you can put a good ol CD into or even your own movie is a good idea. some in flight movies cost money too, bring books. if you like sewing, bring something you're working on. you can bring a camera to take photos of the view outside the plane if you're a shutterbug, crosswords/wordsearch, a book, a handheld game system. depending on the flight length a nap is a good idea, i would get a pillow and bring it in my carry on though. i dont think their pillows are as comfy prob.
  3. Suicide isn't the way to go, ever. You might wanna call your doctor or a suicide hotline. A lot of the boards on here mention where to go for help. My ex best friend, I didn't know her as long. I'm only 20 and we met when I was like 18? Idk. She stole half my things, cleaned out my wallet and a bunch of other shit. My parents never liked her and I vouched for her. I helped pay her deposit for her apartment, I got her graduation gifts, etc. and she felt the need to fuck me over. I almost lost all my clothes and belongings and would've had to start new thanks to her. People suck man, this is why I keep to myself. I stay off facebook, I only get on here, fetlife and my tumblr. That's it. well and pinterest. I stopped messing with people when i realized most are out for themselves and are nothing but drama. Welcome to the society we live in, you have to take the time to find the good gems.
  4. California, dude? I wish I was going D: My boyfriend and I leave next Friday for Austin/Dallas depending on which we go to. Usually, there will be some place you can stay. If a hotel loses your reservation, called around for others. Hell, AirBnB even dude if you don't wanna be in a nasty ass motel. If anything his parents might let ya'll stay considering the circumstances, I would call ahead to check on your reservation for your hotel. Flying fears make sense, plenty of people have them but plane accidents are actually a rare occurrence. As far as packing goes, make a list. Plenty of people do that to. Check everything off before you leave. Maybe don't pack everything tightly, or whatever so you can make sure it's all there? Or pack as you check off your list? Whatever works/helps. Save the things you might need before your trip for last. Think of it like moving, if you've got travel tolietries and sets of clothes set aside you're good. Make sure you've got clothes set aside to wear the day of, and something to shower/shave/brush teeth/etc with before you go too of course. I've got stock piles of soap, so I wasn't worried there, but that's me. But everything you plan to bring, make a list of it. On your phone, your computer, good ol pen and paper, and if you do paper tack it next to your calendar or tape it to your bathroom mirror where you'll see it and not forget it's there. You might find it easier to pack and check off as you go. That being said, I would set aside the things you plan to take with you. The things you can set aside, and that day get the things you couldn't set aside but can now pack. Some people make a mess packing and then checking things, so some check and pack as they go. Fold your clothes up and set them on your dresser or dining room table near your luggage case. Same with everything else, you can even place a note on it saying do not touch, for trip only! As a little reminder if you need to. As you begin to check things off, pack them. 3 pairs of underwear, place in suitcase, check off list. 3 pairs of socks, place in suitcase, check off list. If for some reason you forgot to put something in your pile you set aside of things this is a good time to go grab it and pack it! Remember the main things you need to pack: Phone Phone chargers ****** this is a big one. Meds Clothes Wallet/keys/money/drivers license/etc. When it comes to packing your meds, don't bring the entire bottle. I really just wouldn't reccomend it. In the past as a kid when I was on ADHD meds, my parents just put my meds in a baggie for how many days I needed them. If you've got empty script bottles, that works too. If you can't tell a med by it's looks - some people can't especially a new med - label the script bottle, or baggie. Put your dosage info if you need to, as well as how many are in there if you like. Making sure you pack your meds properly is also a big big deal. I say don't bring your entire bottles, because I've actually managed to lose meds just staying the night with people because I had a hole in my bag and half the bottle fell out and I had no idea. That, and if they get lost, or stolen by someone like if you're out somewhere eating or something like that, not all doctors will refill. If a pill box is easier, then do that. they make some that are daily, with AM/PM or even AM/mid day/PM if you need it. And again, if you need your info on your meds don't feel bad to make a note. Empty script bottles are common if you just got a refill. I keep some of mine, I put other things in them. Some people use them for change, others for meds that fell out of their bottles like pain killers - over the counter. Again, in a situation like that label the bottle. Worrying about everything won't help, it'll make things worse. I know that's not saying much when you've got MI, because you can't control it but it's true.
  5. Don't change meds/dosages without talking to your doctor first. I'm not a medical prof. but me and a lot of others on this site cannot stress this enough unless you get an ok from your doc. Amtitryptiline/Nortitryptiline are really not good for BPD. Apparently, according to some PNP's I've seen they're like outdated drugs and they can cause Tardive Dyskinesia. TD Source. I would see your doctor again and talk to him/her about your medication before you change anything. Also, a lot of people from what I've seen on here, also take what I do for migraines - Lamitogrine is the actual drug name like the one no one ever knows how to spell. Lol, like how Sertaline is Zoloft. But it's also Lamictal. It helps with migraines, and supposedly enhances your current meds. You could ask your doctor if you might could be on it.
  6. I've never heard of hearing voices as a BPD thing, a Schizo - Effective thing, yes. BPD, no. But I've been wrong before. You do also need to take care of yourself before others, when you have MI you're allowed to be selfish in that respect. Remember that. Your health is just as important as anyone else's. Another thing I sorta self taught myself also suffering anxiety is that when you have an attack acknowledge you are. Own it. Because ignoring it makes it worse and causes your anxiety to end up winning basically. It works for some people but not others. If you acknowledge it though, from what I read it helps. Then following with a, I'm ok, I'm safe, etc. sort of calming things. Maybe try it and see if it helps? I've had to leave places because of my anxiety, I went to a truck stop by my motel room to use their internet and work on my fanfic since I rarely leave the room and started having one. I told myself i'm not leaving over an anxiety attack because as soon as I get home, I'll be fine. so i stayed, and i was okay.
  7. I don't think it's a gender thing, but let's look at some online..."facts"? According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV), about 75 percent of people who are diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) are women. There are a lot of theories about why this might be. (https://www.borderlinepersonalitytreatment.com/borderline-personality-disorder-women.html) It does sound like you have a lot of common symptoms of BPD, but you could possibly be Bipolar. You could have BPD, and depression and anxiety like me. None of us are medical professionals. While we can say yeah you sound like you might have something, self diagnosis isn't ever a good thing. Especially if you think you have it, and you might not, and now it's in your head that you do. It could just cause a host of problems, if that makes sense? I've not had any caffeine yet, so I'm trying here mate. You need to see a doctor, and let them do tests to know for sure. Don't try to get a diagnosis online, that's a no no. They have all the little tests online to see if you might have something, but they even say these aren't official diagnosis and shouldn't be treated as such. It's a good idea to ask to see if you should see a doctor about getting tested, but don't trying to get a diagnoses not from a medical professional is what I mean. To clarify. Just get in to see a doctor and explain everything you feel, please please don't hold anything back. The more open and honest you are, I feel the better help you'll get! Doctors aren't going to look down on you or make fun of you, it's their job to help you feel/get better! Remember that and good luck.
  8. IMO, Bipolar Disorder is worse. However, the two share a lot of common symptoms/problems. Due to this, they are very commonly misdiagnosed for the other. but, apparently I'm wrong. Which is why I said IMO. Bipolar Disorder's problems allow "breaks" inbetween periods of maniac phases/hypomania whereas with BPD it's constant. As a sufferer of BPD, I can very much so vouch to that statement. And BPD is more in tuned to relationships more than anything, and apparently the depression is worse - also very true. I think that anyone who suffers from MI feels like they're "crazy". We feel like we don't fit in, our that we aren't "normal" and a lot of us crave that feeling of "normality" although normal isn't really a thing. Maybe a state of mind that comes and goes? But no one is normal, normal isn't a thing. Just telling people you've got anxiety they look at you differently, same with depression, and then when you come in there with BPD, Bipolar, Schizophrenia, OCD, etc people are like "oh my god they really are nuts." Which doesn't make sense, because if you didn't know, just about everyone can be diagnosed with something. Even something minor, like anxiety. I feel like it's more minor than BPD, OCD, Schizophrenia, etc. Not to say anxiety is just "nothing" as I also suffer from anxiety it's not. Just I feel the illnesses I named and others are a bit worse. If that makes sense. Common diagnoses are anxiety and depression. Some people get depression after giving birth - of course, postpartum, after losing a relative/loved one/s.o., etc. Life happens, it's going to. I don't like putting that I'm disabled on job applications, according to the state I am. But legally I don't have to disclose that. when I do I feel like it'll impact a choice to hire, legally it's not suppose to, but i'm sure it has before. Employers might be like, what if they have an anxiety attack in the middle of a busy rush and just break down? Or what if this or what if that? I guess I'm a liability. I've also got a bad work history, some people with MI are totally successful in holding jobs, etc. Some of us, like me, are not. i'm getting off track, sorry. In regards to medication, I've been given various things. Right now, as my signature states I take Zoloft/Sertaline and Lamitogrine/Lamictal. Zoloft for depression/anxiety and Lamictal to enhance it and kill my migraines. Just remember, if you ever feel crazy.....you fit in here at CB. We all do. We're all mad here! So welcome, lol. You also don't ever have to tell people about your MI, it's your business and no one else's. My boyfriend and I had a bit of a bump in the road because he keeps telling people about my problems. but I don't do that to him, since this is an appropriate place he has Bipolar disorder. BPD and Bipolar disorder also happen to clash, especially in relationships because being so similar, among other issues. He's told people I'm crazy, yeah I've heard his tone and he's been kidding but it's not funny and it's something we had to discuss. It's my business to tell someone I'm MI, not anyone else's. It's my illness, no one else's. Yeah, other people have it and if they wanna shout that from the rooftops more power to em, but some random person at the grocery store needn't know I'm a little bit of a nut. Just remember that, you don't have to disclose MI to people. Except like medical professionals. If you go to the ER they'll ask if you take meds, if you say yes I take scripts, sometimes they ask what for and who perscribes them, this is a setting where your MI won't be like, looked down on? They need to know about all meds so if they need to medicate you, it doesn't react to yours and possibly kill you or something serious. Does that make sense? Like, professionals, doctors, etc. usually need to know, at least about meds which sometimes they can conclude is because of MI. But, an employer? They can't legally get that information from you without your permission to disclose. Friends? Don't gotta know. Significant other? Don't gotta know, there's a time and a place. Don't bring up MI on a first date, unless you know, you met on here. Trying to be funny and failing of course. Parents? Nope, unless you're a minor - maybe, even then? I don't think so. Is it good to tell people close to you so they can try to help you if you have anxiety attacks, etc? Sometimes, yeah. We need our loved ones to keep us in check and help us feel better. But if you're like me, and your dad thinks since he took like two psych classes he's a damn doctor now....I don't blame you for not wanting to talk about it. I'm the black sheep.
  9. I've had some problems with them before as well, I don't blame you for being persistent in getting a refund. You should get what you paid for, that's kind of a duhhhh thing. So tell them, DUH. Lol. I would keep bothering them too, they're suppose to refund or send the right item in a situation like this. And since they sent the wrong thing, they're responsible for shipping this time round if you paid for it when you purchased, as well as return shipping. I got the wrong thing on like, Amazon once? I think? I ordered, let's say an adult item, I didn't get it. I got something totally different. Like.....bikini wax stuff? I didn't know what it was to be honest, I just knew it wasn't what I ordered. I contacted them and they sent the right thing, plus something extra if I remember correctly, but no plug for it. It was sort of a lost cause, never again,.
  10. @tyrantblade I've sent the wrong books to people before. How? I put the wrong shipping label/postage label on the wrong package. that' how.
  11. Some people have service animals who help them remember, i.e. a dog who brings them their medication bottles, or signals it's time for meds. I got really bad about remembering mine, and I can't afford to have a dog trained for that (and the other things I'd need) so I put an app on my phone. I picked the most annoying notification sound, and it goes off every FIVE minutes until I confirm I took my medicine. I knew it would work, and it has. You have to be careful, depending on the med that's dangerous.
  12. I reallllllllllly wouldn't sweat it. I wouldn't. Don't care what others think, it saves so much pain/effort/heartache/dissapointment, etc. Don't worry...be happy!
  13. It could have been an honest mistake @tyrantblade as someone who's sold on eBay since well, highschool and so does my dad for part of his comic book business (instead of just selling locally) it DOES happen. It's happened to me before, pretty sure it has my dad too just starting out. People can make honest mistakes, don't just always assume the worst. I hope things get figured out and fixed in your favor.
  14. first, let me say holy shat, $45?! dude, the consignments stores here must be greedy because like no way in HELL are you getting that much money. better of selling on FB trading posts, eBay, etc. Anyways, I get paranoid a lot too because of my anxiety and social paranoia problems too. It causes me to hermit a lot in my home and refuse to go out and socialize with people because I worry they'll not like me. A lot of times I do things to make people not like me - like ask if they don't like me. That's not really good customer service on her end, at least I feel it's not. It's really unprofessional too. I've worked in retail at a handful of stores, from places to Dollar General to places such as Kohl's. I've cleared out dressing rooms, as I worked the sales floor. I did returns, not often though and exchanges. I also ran the register. working retail in the past, IF I have time I try to put clothes on the hanger and bring them out. Depending on the place, and who's working I'll put them back. At Walmart, one in town where I live, there's a lady I call mom who's from England and she's super nice to me. I call her mom because she acts like my mom. And British people are ADORABLE! I sometimes will put clothes back for her. If a place is busy, I'll put my clothes back. It also depends on if I remember where they were to begin with. It's a nice change of pace for some people in retail, I usually explain I've worked retail so I get it. They appreciate that act of kindness. At the same time though, a lot of places are really surprised at people putting things back on hangers and bringing them out. Really, I mean it. A lot of people just leave a big mess in the fitting room - hangers, clothes everywhere. Missing tags, etc. You get what I mean, we've all seen it at least once. If you put the clothes on the hanger and hang them, that's okay too. If the clerk is busy and you don't wish to bother them - you don't need to bring the clothes out. Basically, courtesy is at least putting them on their hangers. You did that, you did good. A+ for you, friend! There are so many reasons though why a lot of places rather you NOT, put the clothes back on the rack. Whether it be because of a sale, they're re-arranging clothes for a sale, for some reason they have something marked down maybe due to damage (especially if it was returned), etc. some places just know it's their job, and they won't ask you to do it. Putting them on the hangers is respectful in itself because (as someone who's worked in retail, my exp.): When we're clearing fitting rooms, we really don't have the spare time to check hangers ; meaning if you got something in a small and a medium because let's say you lost weight and don't know what fits you now ; we have to take the extra time to check tags for sizes. And then put the appropriate hanger on the item. Leaving a mess of hangers/clothes on the floor means it takes us longer to put the appropriate hanger on an item - which in turn means it's not going back to the floor for a good minute; which means we don't make sales. That's not suppose to sound snobby - but what if there was ONE top left in your size and someone tried it on, didn't put it on their hanger so now an associate is running around for hangers to get it hung up and put back on the floor - and until they do you can't try it on or buy it? sometimes, when you don't hang your clothes hangers go missing and/or get stolen. When I worked at Kohl's this happened more than it should've. we had to go back to the hanger cart - and get new hangers. Which is a headache because you have to find the right sizes. It's easy to put your hanger back on your item - unless you really don't know how. Bras are the worst culprit of this. and if, out of our rush to replenish the sales floor we mis-hang an item (aka wrong hanger size, on wrong sized item. happens all the time, out of rush of course. you can find at least three items wherever you go that are mis-hung. this shouldn't happen unless the store ACTUALLY doesn't have the hanger for that item anymore which is a like 1/1000000 chance.) Hanging your clothes back up, and keeping them out of the floor presents a clean fitting room. No one wants to go into a dirty fitting room, and have to kick/move/whatever - we've done them all - clothes out of the way. Especially when you're trying on A LOT; you don't want to worry about someone else's mess they left. the main things being - mislabeled hangers/mislabeled items - items not being back on the floor in time because we're taking so much time to re-hang clothes on hangers so you might not get what you need/want. That being said, you do not work for that store. It is not your job to put clothes back on the rack - and if that lady likes to think so you can tell her you should get an employee discount on what you buy then; since you apparently work there now. Her attitude wasn't called for. Personally, I wouldn't deal with someone like that again. Social phobia issues or not - it's unprofessional and uncalled for. If she bothers you as much as you say - and I don't blame you for feeling that way - go to another store! You might make better money in the long run. Good customer service makes people wanna come back. And consigning clothes is profit for a store because you get a percentage of the sale. That lady just lost profit for her store, that's her own fault. Not yours. Period. Another store will love that you wanna consign with them to make some money and them make profit. Profit is what keeps stores open, which keeps you consigning with them and making money! It's like a consigning circle of life In terms of your self esteem, I have bad self esteem too and I feel like no one likes me. Not everyone you meet will like you - THAT'S OKAY! Not everyone is suppose to like you, if everyone liked everyone it would be because we were all the same person - or so I feel, which is boring. We have flaws, no one is meant to be perfect and that's what makes us all unique! Remember that.
  15. If you have any kind of shelving, I might be willing to pay the shipping when I get paid on the 25th. We need a shelf to put our food in our motel room.