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About sugarsugar

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  1. Interesting that thinking on this has changed so much over the years. I used to become a totally different person premenstrually, and at the time progesterone was the solution. I admit it made me feel better than any med or substance ever has before or since, it was like a miracle drug. I switched to otc progesterone cream and it still worked. Then I aged out of needing it but now I see that it’s ADs that are used instead now—does no one use hormonal treatments for a hormonal disorder anymore? I’m sorry your GYN is useless. I wish I had some current treatment advice that might help but at least know I’ve been there. Are there any GYNs who specialize In hormonal issues you could see? I know that’s the route I had to take but it was worth it.
  2. I was extremely tired and diagnosed with autoimmune hypothyroid plus a couple other less chronic things, and I did feel better after starting meds. I’ve been on them for years and my labs on them are fine. It wasn’t magic like I’d hoped but not interested in going off, since I see no reason the underlying cause would be gone.
  3. One thing to consider—if Simon does change his mind and tells, he may not tell the story in a truthful way, especially if he ends up angry or wanting to look good in this. And that would be worse. In general I don’t think telling is always the best choice but in this case it may be. I suspect at some point the truth will come out anyway and it’ll be best if it comes from you. At least that’s my take on it, fwiw.
  4. Heartbroken

    I was in a similar situation with my husband. He actually was planning to move while I was at work and leave me to come home to find him and his stuff gone but I caught on before that. I was caught off guard and devastated. I told myself I did fine before I met him and I’d find a way to do fine again, and didn’t want someone who’d do me that way anyway. Then I worked to actually believe all that and stayed super busy. I also had a support system at that point who took my side but I was miserable less and less over time. At 6 months later he asked to come back. Are you kidding me? I refused to even discuss it, why would I get back together with someone who would say horrendously hurtful things and plan to leave me like that? He said awful things when he left including that he’d been living a lie with me. Also then I had a tdoc who helped me. I still feel twinges thinking of it and the sense of betrayal but as I said time and support helped, plus cutting off contact with him. If I still was in contact it would have been harder. I was deceived and that hurts, maybe you feel that way too. It did affect my ability to trust. I hope you have some support and can avoid any contact, you’ve done nothing wrong here.
  5. Too long in therapy?

    I’ll add, i spent a long time in therapy that was bad, but that doesn’t mean all therapy is bad. And I spent a short time with a very good therapist but the HMO only allowed infrequent visits, I could have benefited from more. I think it can go both ways but sometimes in your life it’s beneficial to keep going. When it feels right you can stop, is my thinking.
  6. Does your therapist take notes?

    I don’t recall much note taking except a few very brief words. One made a point of saying she never took notes so they couldn’t be used against me, which seemed to play into my paranoia. But they mainly remembered important stuff, well, except one but she was pretty good and remembered the important stuff. If one forgot a lot, notes or not, I wouldn’t like it. Sounds like yours doesn’t read her notes prior to your appointment.
  7. I tried and tried everything in so many books. I was told that I needed to stop dealing with my best friends death and focus on remembering “programming “ and quit denying it and resisting working on it. Didn’t matter what I thought about it. And that I should cut off all contact with my family.
  8. I'm better!

    Good meds are great! So nice when something finally works! I’m happy for you.
  9. I agree you may find a loophole or get a reduced rate. I bargained a reduced, but not low, rate once. Although I was a victim of abusive therapy and actually did better when I ended up without it—go figure. Can’t say I’ve heard that from anyone else so hopefully it’s rare. My current HMO is set up so monthly visits are the norm but you have to have goals, be working on things, or be in crisis. It seems harsh but it’s what’s covered by my current insurance Another thing they do is have some 30 minute sessions. Not ideal but cheaper—would that be an option? Their system is 30 minutes and in between a phone check in. Pretty bare bones but if you can’t find a better solution it may be worth considering something like that. I was in weekly therapy for years so I know it’s hard to go from that to nothing.
  10. When depressed, I can’t get the energy to exercise. One thing I did find was having my vit D checked showed rock bottom levels. That can contribute to low energy and depression and getting to high normal helped a lot. Don’t get me wrong, my depression was chronic, but the vit D thing made it worse. And I did get levels followed. I could barely get out of bed and I felt like I was swimming through thick molasses if that makes sense. Exercise? If I could barely get dressed how would I exercise? It used to insult me when I got that advice. No idea about your vit D but I like to mention it in case it can help anyone else. Lack of energy was a huge huge problem for me and only better meds helped except for the brief time I used SAD lights—they were helpful at the time.
  11. Course of illness

    I was diagnosed bipolar in my 50s although someone should have caught on years sooner. My depression was bad for years and years but I did at times have what were in retrospect hypomanic and mixed episodes. I think those got worse when they occurred but it’s hard to judge in retrospect. Now I don’t have much trouble with depression, for the first time since childhood. Go figure. But I don’t know that my situation is very helpful because I had no idea what was going on for years and now I’m working with completely different types of meds. Hindsight isn’t always accurate and I’m trying to make sense of my past given a diagnosis that was late to the party. But in general I got worse with age until starting on better meds.
  12. Trapped on meds

    I hope you can get your meds straightened out. I was only on one truly truly awful med, it made me suicidal and weepy, and with weird side effects, although other people never report those things. So different meds for different people. Now finally my meds are a good mix which I hope you get to as well. Call before your appointment if you need to.
  13. Control the Cravings

    Does sound like a med change of some sort is needed. Have you discussed this with your pdoc, and if so, were you heard? Oh yeah I’ve been there and I don’t want to go back so you’re not alone. It took some time for meds to make a difference but otherwise it’s hard to change. I’d avoid going places alone and stay off apps and such. But be realistic and have what you need for safer sex if you do have an encounter. Impulsive behavior is just not fun, I hope you can get meds adjusted soon.
  14. I was on many ADs when diagnosed with MDD and didn’t get severely manic but cymbalta put me into a manic state that lasted months and led to a bipolar diagnosis. I kept going up on the dose and when it got to the final point it was fairly soon, within weeks I think, but not like flipping a light switch. Then I had to wean off so I was on even longer. Yeah it fixed that depression alright. Led me to near bankruptcy and very risky behavior for long enough to label me BP1. I’d be afraid to take ADs again after that, afraid it could be worse next time. Fortunately current meds are working.
  15. Oversensitivity

    I think I’m oversensitive to thinking people are critical of me or don’t like me. Unless I’m more on the manic-heading part of the spectrum, when I assume everyone loves me. Sometimes I can talk myself into realizing I’m possibly exaggerating but hey sometimes I’m right about it. I guess my approach then is trying to not let it bother me so much. Easier said than done and some days it really affects me. Other days I can get past it. I may have a chance to get a higher level job soon but this fear people won’t like me then or will be critical is sort of making me not want to try. So yes it’s a problem even if I’m not depressed, but much worse if I am.