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nervousnellie

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About nervousnellie

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  1. Funny you're talking about seeing a pdoc because in my last post I was actually going to suggest that very thing. I just know it's not always easy in European countries. Regarding your psychologist, it sounds like she simply doesn't understand true anxiety. Yes, take a break from posting for sure - it seems like that would be a smart thing to do. And don't give up hope; these meds can kick in a bit late. You could still feel the anxiety melting away, but if not you'll have the pdoc's help. And I personally wouldn't hesitate, for right now, taking whatever the gp said you could take as far as benzo dose (Xanax I think it was?). Don't hesitate with that. If they think it's ok then I'm sure it's fine and you need it. Very best of luck. You'll be fine, just have to get through the seemingly impossible stretch of anxiety. I've been there and thought I'd NEVER, EVER be the same again, and here I am - doing well (knock on wood - guess I have some anxiety left cuz I'm still superstitious about it ). Take care!!!
  2. Well, the great news is you still sound extremely positive. Remind yourself of that!! I am sorry the Trintellix didn't work out, but if the Wellbutrin tempered your panic before, I bet it will work again. My pdoc is TOTALLY for CBT. He has even told me it works as well as, if not better than, meds! I have thought about starting it but as you know, once you're feeling fine on the meds you feel like you don't need anything else which isn't smart or good for us, but I've fallen into the trap too. This is a common tactic, but sometimes when I find myself worrying about the panic coming back I say 'STOP' and imagine a big stop sign in front of me. Then I redirect my thoughts. The damn panic really is a "fear of the fear" (for me at least), and my panic is ALL about worrying about the panic coming back! So if I make myself STOP (sometimes I have to do this a few times), then start thinking about ANYTHING else (like what I need at the grocery store; what my day looks like tomorrow; ANYTHING), it really seems to help. But - that's only when I'm not already in panic mode. Once you're in that mode it's difficult to get out of without meds, in my experience. And thank you SO MUCH for the info from your dad about Klonopin. Yes, my pdoc is convinced it's fine for me (sometimes even encourages me to take a little more if I need it but I usually don't). Your comments were reassuring. Keep us posted on how you're doing!
  3. Sorry about the Truxal :(. Sounds like you've got a plan, though, and that's always a good thing. Sounds like there are still alternatives you can try IF for whatever reason this doesn't work (and I think it will). They're always coming up with new drugs for anxiety. I also just read that very soon genetic testing (simple blood test) will be available to see which antidepressant will work best for a person's depression. My guess is that the same test could be used for anxiety as well (it all has to do with how your body metabolizes drugs). I can't remember without reading all the previous posts - are you taking the Trintellix at bedtime? That seems to help me as far as nausea goes. Very interesting about Norway's drug/alcohol policies! Don't we ALL have some rather random laws on the books? (except maybe Canada.. ). I'm glad to hear what your dad said about Klonopin. When I hear that a country (or doc) won't prescribe it, it makes me nervous about being on it for so long. Take care and hang in there! You're at the very worst of it now; it's only better from here.
  4. Believe it or not, you still sound very positive to me, despite the way you're feeling. So that really is good news - the Brintellix may be helping more than you think (I know you don't have depression, but at least for me anxiety can really mess with my mood even though I don't consider myself "depressed" per se). It's also good that you're reminding yourself that you had increased anxiety when you started on the 5 mg. AND that it went away. Interesting that Norway is so careful with Klonopin. My pdoc is very wary of Xanax (I think because of its short half-life and the fact that he feels people build a tolerance to it more easily, but who knows). I do get a bit nervous thinking about how long I've been on Klonopin (over a decade, but for most of the time at .5mg so not a huge dose). I'd love to slowly taper off of it some day.... One more thing: Can you hang out at 7.5mg for a while before going up to the 10mg? It seems like there's no reason to rush this, especially if it gives you more anxiety initially. FWIW: I had horrible, TERRIBLE start-up anxiety with Paxil years and years ago, but it ended up being absolutely wonderful for my anxiety after those first rough couple weeks. Thanks for the update and keep us posted! Hang in there - you're doing/thinking all the right things!!
  5. I know how you feel. I've googled meds in the past (and illnesses) and it's always a mistake I think people like us (anxious types) should learn to trust our docs You are exactly right: people who are breezing through this stuff RARELY take the effort to post about it! I really think you'll be okay increasing your dosage. You're going slowly and the fact that you feel relatively normal now is a really good sign. Keep us posted, and good luck. If I don't reply it's only because I haven't been checking these board as often as I'd like to (see what happens when you feel better?!)
  6. Glad it helped! Just hang in there. The chances of you throwing up are super, super low. To get you through the adjustment period, would your doc ever be willing to prescribe a benzo? Just for a short while? A very small dose would probably do the trick. Not sure how willing they are to prescribe benzos in Norway, but you'd probably only need a very small dose and for a short period of time. Mine has prescribed Klonopin (Clonazepam). It helped immensely when I first started on it (.5mg). Best of luck and keep us updated on how you're doing!
  7. Hi! I have good news for you. I am on Trintellix (in the US). I have been on it since February and it has NEVER made me throw up. On top of that, it, along with .5 mg of Klonopin which I've been taking for over a decade, has helped with my extreme anxiety. Last January the .5 Klonopin alone was not doing the trick, so I attribute this improvement to the Trintellix. I am currently on 10 mg of Trintellix. I was going to take 15mg, but that would require me to cut pills and I simply didn't feel like dealing with that. The 10mg seems to be working (knock on wood...). It did take a few weeks (maybe a couple months) until this drug was really working to its fullest potential. Now - as you realize, you are simply NOT a thrower-upper. Neither am I. I hate it as well (and although I don't think I have a phobia about it, my teenage son definitely does so I totally understand your fear). It seems to me that some people tend to throw up; others just don't for whatever reason. When I started the Trintellix I started at 2.5mg. Even that tiny dose made my stomach feel a bit yucky but NO WHERE NEAR where it would feel if I were going to vomit. Nothing even close. And it never has. I say this because if you are already taking 5mg and not feeling any nausea, I don't think you are going to. I just do not think this is a side effect that you are going to have. I now take my 10mg dose at bed, even on an empty stomach. If it takes me a while to fall asleep then occasionally I feel THE TINIEST BIT weird, but it is so minor that it could even be my imagination or due to something else. Bottom line: 1) Trintellix has worked for my anxiety. 2) I have never, ever even come anywhere close to vomiting from it. 3) i don't think you are going to even experience nausea from this drug if you haven't already. 4) Wouldn't it be ironic if the Trintellix even helped you stop obsessing about throwing up? Good luck!!
  8. Need reassurance about sleep....

    Thanks so much, @dtac. Fortunately my anxiety is under control (and with that, the insomnia is as well). I only have insomnia when I get anxious (so anxiety is my primary problem, not insomnia). Very good to know, though, that the other Benzos are better for sleep than Klonopin. I didn't know that so I appreciate your input! Actually didn't even know they were benzos!
  9. Need reassurance about sleep....

    Thanks, @HAL9000. Do you prefer Valium over Klonopin? And I've tried .25 to .5mg Xanax. It doesn't seem to help when I'm in panic mode (which really worries me and makes me want to get off of benzos). I just really want to make sure I'm not becoming extremely tolerant. I'm sure I've developed somewhat of a tolerance to the .5mg Klon that I've been on for about 13 years (it's only been the past few months and sporadically throughout the years that I've been on more than that). I just want to go down/off benzos so I know they're there in the future to help me if I need them. I know that sounds strange, but not having something that can quell the panic FAST is a scary thought.
  10. Need reassurance about sleep....

    Thanks for all that info, @Cetkat. Yes, it is no doubt the anxiety which messes with my sleep. But I may not have been very clear. I DO still get bouts of this anxiety even when I'm not traveling. Sometimes I can pinpoint a trigger but often I can't. It's really sort of conditioning. It started years ago after my oldest child was born. I was lying in bed in the middle of the night after a feeding, and told myself, "I must fall asleep NOW. I'll have to get up in 2 hours again to do this!" Rather than the annoyance/severe irritation that most people would get when they didn't fall right to sleep, I went into a state of panic with all the varying symptoms (shaking, diarrhea, etc.). It wasn't an "attack" per se because it didn't go away. Then all my fears turned to, oh my gosh, what if this doesn't go away? I'll NEVER be able to sleep! I can't take care of my child! It is definitely a "fear of the fear" and is absolutely, positively ridiculous, but I can't help it. Nowadays, without meds, every once in a while I'll be perfectly happy lying in bed and the "what if it happens again" will pop into my mind. Usually I can distract myself but sometimes I can't and when I can't the anxiety takes over. I think the reason it happens MORE when I travel is because I feel stuck which gives me even more reason to fear this fear. Completely ridiculous, I know. But your point about having a plan in place is KEY because if I have a plan the panic usually does not escalate. Don't get me wrong. I am a generally anxious person and have been a "what iffer" my entire life. I think I'm probably better off staying on an SSRI or similar permanently (or doing serious CBT). Thanks for the advice about the milk and ginger. Roughly how much chopped ginger root would you use? I initially used some ginger capsules. They only worked sporadically. It's hard to figure out. Thx again!
  11. Need reassurance about sleep....

    I wanted to post an update in case anyone is interested in Trintellix. I am currently on 12.5mg Trintellix (a weird dose - long story; I may go up to 15 or down to 10). I am also still on 1mg Klonopin/day (in the evening because my anxiety is sleep-related). I am feeling really good. I have little to no "abnormal" anxiety; just normal stuff (and even that seems much better). If/when I wake up at night I don't panic like I was and I go right back to sleep. I am also feeling a lot more optimistic about a lot of things in my life. In a nutshell, this drug seems to be working. I'm sure the Klonopin is also helping, but a few weeks ago early in the Trintellix treatment, I was also on 1.25 mg Klonopin and was still having bad anxiety, so I'm pretty sure the Trintellix has kicked in. My plan is to go down to the .5 mg Klonopin (VERY slowly) that I was on for years before this recent anxiety/panic episode. I would even love to taper off of that .5 long-term, but I'm not sure that's possible or the right thing for me. Although Trintellix hasn't been approved for treating anxiety, my pdoc thinks it's a matter of time. I'm still a bit confused about why some studies are saying it doesn't have an impact on anxiety; my pdoc explained that there was something not quite reliable about these studies, and I just don't recall the specifics. It definitely seems to work on MY anxiety, and my pdoc has said he has many patients successfully taking it for anxiety. I do still have a slight bit of nausea with the drug, just sometimes. I can't quite pinpoint why I have it some days and not others. I take it after dinner, and at this point it does not affect my sleep (I've read others who say it does cause them insomnia; perhaps this is earlier in treatment or they may just react differently than I. This drug is EXPENSIVE. Make sure you check with your insurance company before you even consider it. And ask your pdoc for a coupon and samples. If he/she doesn't have a coupon, look online. It saves you a lot of money, at least at the beginning. Let me know if you have any questions, and thank you to everyone who helped me out during this very horrible time. Oh, and by the way I traveled a couple weeks ago which is usually a trigger for me and had absolutely no problem. Didn't even take the Seroquel that I have had to take in the past.
  12. Hi @march, you haven't posted (at least on this thread) for a while, so I'm hoping you are better. I just happened upon your post - something in your title was interesting to me. But something you described sounded almost identical to what I get BEFORE I have a hot flash. When I read your words, "An ache, an unease, some weird tingles," I was floored because this is exactly what happens to me before I have a hot flash (I'm experiencing menopause pretty early; sorry if TMI). This ache, unease, weird tingles wakes me up almost every night, at least once. It is NOT the sweating that wakes me up, it is these weird tingles/feelings/UNEASE beforehand. That's how strong they are. I am able to get back to sleep UNLESS I am in fight-or-flight mode which I've written about on another thread. This fight-or-flight is very separate from the "unease" that I feel before the hot flash. It sounds like you are experiencing fight-or-flight too and I'm sorry to hear that. It is horrendous, especially when it goes on without a break. But it sounds like it is separate from these other feelings you are having. My questions for you: have you started having hot flashes? Do you know if you've started menopause? And here's a big one to see if you have the same thing as I do: do these weird tingles/feelings go away after a couple minutes or do they last longer? Mine are thankfully brief, and I know every time that a hot flash is imminent. If you are noticing these are distinct occurrences with both a starting point and a stopping point I would really wonder if it's hormone related (maybe even if you haven't started having hot flashes). And, unfortunately, mine can occur frequently (sometimes multiple times an hour in certain circumstances), but I still notice a definite start/stop. It's like a wave that washes over me, but mine ends a short while after I start feeling hot. Have you seen those stupid bumper stickers ladies have on their cars that say, "They aren't hot flashes. They're power surges?" I think this "wave" is really what they are talking about. It's really unpleasant. Anyway, I am certainly no expert, but I absolutely had to reply because of the similarities with what I've had. You won't find any of this on the other thread I started - that thread was only about my horrible fight-or-flight that starts with sleep anxiety. I didn't discuss these really yucky feelings because I know exactly what they are, and knowing that helps. If you think yours may be hormonal you may want to have your estrogen levels tested. Then again, unless you want to go on hormone replacement therapy there may not be much they can do. But if your estrogen is low it could help you at least understand what's going on. Take care!
  13. Need reassurance about sleep....

    Thanks, @melissaw72. Oh yes, there is NO doubt in my mind that the 1.25mg of Klonopin is doing SOMETHING. Without it I don't think I would have been able to even function when my anxiety was at its peak a couple weeks ago while out of town (I see you have an anxiety disorder in your signature so I'm sure you understand how dysfunctional one can be when anxiety is at a peak. It is the worst). What I can't figure out now is, why was I panicking while on that dose a couple weeks ago but NOW, on the same dose, I'm not panicking/having high anxiety? Is it just because I was travelling and now I'm not? I typically panic whenever I wake up in the middle of the night whether I'm travelling or not but as of now I'm not freaking out even though I am up a bit at night. Maybe I'm just hoping that the Trintellix has kicked in...... My plan over the next months, assuming I remain stable, is to taper the Klonopin down very slowly while staying on the Trintellix (probably not off, but down to the .5mg I've been on for over a decade). I have to travel again in a couple months. If I am able to make it through that trip without anxiety (even if I don't sleep perfectly), then I'll attribute it to the Trintellix working. If not then back to the drawing board. Pristiq was the other option my pdoc wanted me to try, but I would really need to understand his thinking in using something with norepinephrine to treat someone with severe anxiety. @on-the-verge Trintellix (used to be called Brintellix) is pretty new. Many people haven't heard about it. It's supposed to be very successful in treating depression but it's not yet proven for anxiety, though my pdoc has had good success with it in treating anxiety. It is supposed to cause fewer sexual and weight-gain side effects than SSRI's (it's not exactly an SSRI but similar). It does cause nausea in a lot of patients, myself included, but for now I feel like I can manage it (especially with ginger capsules although they don't help EVERY time for some reason). The very unfortunate thing about it is that there is no generic available and the patent won't expire for years. Without insurance the price is exorbitant - like $200-$300 a month!!!! Makes me so mad (thankfully I have insurance, but so many don't or aren't covered for meds). And thx, @CeruleanBlue. Trazodone is definitely at the top of my list if I need sleep meds!!
  14. Need reassurance about sleep....

    Just an update: I seem to be doing better with the anxiety. This could be due to a few factors: 1) It's been close to 4 weeks on a therapeutic, albeit low dose (10mg) of Trintellix. This is about when my pdoc said it would start helping with anxiety (the anxiety may have been helped even slightly earlier); and/or 2) Part of the time that I was having my HIGH anxiety I was travelling and when I travel I get anxious about sleep, so this may have contributed. Still, I've been waking up at night at home and that's usually when my panic starts (whether I'm home or travelling) and I've been able to lie in bed and just wait in a fairly relaxed state; and/or 3) I'm still on 1.25mg Klonopin, maybe that is helping some (even though it didn't seem to help much when travelling); and/or 4)All of your sleep med advice may have made me realize I WILL be able to find sleep which lessened my anxiety. I guess I won't know if the Trintellix is REALLY helping until I travel again AND go back down on the Klonopin, but my gut feeling is that the Trintellix is helping because I don't even start to get anxious. It's just a completely different feeling. My panic doesn't just don't go from 0 to 60 upon waking in the middle of the night like I did before starting this med. Just posting this for anyone interested, especially in Trintellix. I DO have nausea with it (common) but my pdoc is optimistic that it still may go away. Taking a ginger capsule at the same time as my Trintellix helps sometimes, and taking it while I eat helps a bit as well. I'll post again in a bit. Thank you immensely to all who have helped.
  15. Need reassurance about sleep....

    @Iceberg agreed. It's a matter of the lesser of all the evils. And they also say that lack of sleep possibly increases risk of dementia so there you have it
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