• Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

1 Follower

About mmaryland

  • Rank

Profile Information

  • Gender

Recent Profile Visitors

247 profile views
  1. Did you eventually get the PA approved? How does zolpimist compare to Ambien? I ask because I hate the fact that you have to literally starve yourself IME for 2 hours before you take Ambien for it to work. If I eat anything before bedtime it simply will not have an effect. Does Zolpimist work via absorbing in the mouth? Also how quick does it take to have therapeutic effect? It really sucks some nights when I havent eaten all day because of my stimulants but then cannot eat once I get home (usually late ~9pm) because then my ambien wont work or I will choose to eat but then lie awake in bed for a couple hours before sleeping. If the PA was approved, how much are you paying for one prescription of Zolpimist?
  2. I might get a second opinion, if possible, before going down the ECT road. I am still on the 3mg dose and have not had any mania since being on rexulti so I'm happy with its therapeutic effects and allowing me to be stable. On the other hand, it's not great for controlling anxiety, specifically social anxiety, and the depression that results from it so my dr and I decided to add a small dose of Paxil to help control my social anxiety, which is really amplified in university lectures when group discussion is frequently a significant part of class. BTW are you on a different anti-psychotic now that you have stopped the rexulti?
  3. Lately I've been having terribly awful and violent nightmares that usually involve me dying or being murdered. They haven't bothered me before but recently I noticed I've had a couple passing homicidal thoughts maybe because of my dreams, not that I would ever act on them, ever. Just this morning I was in the elevator with this chick and had a passing thought "What if someone stabbed her, I wonder if they would be caught easily? What if I stabbed her?" then images of a bloody elevator entered my mind as I exited onto my floor. I would never even consider acting on any of these kind of thoughts but am wondering if it's related to my nightmares, because just last night I dreamt about a hammer being smashed through my face in a parking garage after after talking to this guy about his adderall prescription (this is all in my nightmare). Then after the hammer smashing into my head, I had this power to somehow rewind time and make a decision to not go into the parking garage, but the same guy still ended up murdering me at a fruit stand. I'm wondering if dreams like this are normal? I'm guessing no, but am concerned that I'm having disturbing these disturbing thoughts while awake. I just think they might be related as I had the nightmare described above last night and the homicidal thought this morning. Could it be after thoughts of the dream still lingering? They're really beginning to disturb me and make me think about the details of the incidents in my nightmares throughout the day. I'm wondering if anyone else has had nightmares that revolve around you being killed or murdered violently. I hope anyone doesn't think I'm a maniac or psychopath or anything, and I want to stress again I would never turn any homicidal thought into action, I'm just asking for some help here or info about these nightmares
  4. I have been on stimulants since I was 18 years old and I no doubt believe I have grown tolerant and need a higher dose. I started with Adderall XR 20mg then moved to 30mg XR, a couple months later I moved to Vyvanse 70mg and switched back and forth between that and Adderall XR a few times. The efficacy of Adderall was going down and side effects were increasing so I switched back to Vyvanse and eventually to Dexedrine Spansules 10mg twice daily and Dexedrine IR 10mg twice daily earlier in 2017. Since then I have increased to Dexedrine Spansules 15mg twice daily but kept the Dexedrine IR (actually I take the brand Zenzedi) 10mg twice daily. I have wondered if the Lithium is causing it or Seroquel, but it mainly happens when I am on my stimulant medications. I usually take my Dexedrine everyday, so I never am stopping and then re-starting my stimulants. I am wondering if switching back to Adderall IR in the evening instead of Zenzedi would give me more motivation. The Dexedrine is just soo smooth it's almost unnoticeable, and I feel like I need that extra boost to get started on things that levo-amp could provide.
  5. I don't know about you guys, but each time I have started a SSRI I get sick and have flu/cold like symptoms about a week after starting it and it lasts for about a week or two. Oddly enough, I never experienced flu or cold like symptoms when tapering off any SSRI. But yes I do have to agree, once you are at the right dose (if you are able to tolerate the AD) and it starts working, it really works and can do wonders. If Lexapro doesn't end up working out, I think someone previously mentioned Luvox (fluvoxamine) so that might be an option. Viibryd could be another option if Lexapro still leaves your tired and zombie-ish because from what I have heard and researched, Viibryd tends to be somewhat activating/stimulating.
  6. Have you ever had testing done to determine which medications are likely to work and which medications are more likely to cause side effects or not work as well? I found two different sites and which do genetic testing for psychiatric medications to determine which will suit you best, depending on your genes, metabolism and other things. It may be costly, but it can prevent you from going on the med merry go round, or at least reduce it, and provide your doctor with a medical based report of which medication(s) would work best for you.
  7. To me stable means not cycling between mania and depression. It also means maintaining a good level of functionality. Being stable feels normal and I don't know what I would do without my meds that keep me stable. Being able to attend school and work is also another big part of being stable.
  8. I know Zoloft, Prozac and Paxil are use to treat PTSD and are very effective, depending on the person. Remeron is very sedating and will give you an appetite like no tomorrow. For appetite I cannot more highly suggest cyproheptadine, which has been great at helping me to from 120 to 145. Hopefully the traodone helps with more than sleep, since it's an anti-depressant also. When I was on Remeron I recall myself falling asleep with a bag of chips in my lap, and I was on 15mg. It was verrrry sedating for me.
  9. When I am stable, addiction rules my life, especially Xanax. But when I am not stable, my bipolar takes over and reeks havoc on my life. I am more stable that not, so I would say addiction to Xanax rules my life (not rules but plays .a large part). I tried stopping twice but had a seizure both times and was hospitalized. Like tonight I took 10mg Xanax and barely felt it, along with 2 beers, I am beginning to think it's a waste to take excessive doses especially when I get no recreational effect from them. I need someone to control my Xanax supply so I only take what is prescribed to me (1mg twice daily) and nothing more. This high tolerance to Xanax and Valium is killing me, but maybe it's a sign that I need to take a break and take lower doses for a month or so, but I heard benzo tolerance is a bitch and takes a while to go down I was dependent on marijuana but have since been 2 weeks clean so yaaaay for that. Other than that, I need to work on not taking 10mg Xanax just to feel good and taking my prescribed dose, since high doses do nothing for me anyway unless combined with Long Island Iced teas
  10. I took Lexapro in my Freshman going into my Sophomore year of college and I had the same tiredness, zombification feeling you mentioned. I would sit on my couch and watch tv for endless amounts of time during the day when I was supposed to be in class, but the Lexapro made me not care. I found myself not caring about a lot of things and this apathy was eventually what led me to getting off it and taking a short break from SSRIs before starting Paxil. Paxil worked great but I am bipolar and was on no mood stabilizers at the time so I went into full blown mania for an entire semester. Lexapro did help my anxiety, but it just made me not care about the important things in my life and my responsibilities, and I was on 20mg. I was so lazy and my sex drive was nowhere to be found, but Paxil did the same thing.
  11. You could always give Valium a shot just to see if it would be of any benefit. I personally am not fan of the Xanax XR just because I don't feel like it gives me the anxiety relief I need. I prefer the regular release Xanax tablets. But with benzos, tolerance is normal, so it's not abnormal for the 1mg Klonopin to not be doing the trick anymore. I would talk to your doctor about this and tell him 1mg really isn't cutting it anymore and maybe he will raise it to 1mg twice a day or even 2mg once daily. If Klonopin works for you, I would stick with it, unless you haven't tried the other bezos like Valium or Ativan. Best of luck to you and I hope you feel better!
  12. I use eMoods and I love it. It's completely free with no ads and allows you to put your medications in and each day you can check off whether or not you took them. It also screens for depression, anxiety, irritability, and anxiety as well as psychotic symptoms. You can also add notes to each day, making it a bit easier when talking to your psychiatrist so you don't forget what happened on a specific day that increased your anxiety or depression. The best part is that you can export this report to a PDF and print it out and give to your doctor, which I think is great. It's on the iPhone and Android and I highly recommend it. Here is the website for it in case you have trouble finding it.
  13. I am on Rexulti and have not had any weight gain from it since starting it. I also take it during the day because it is not a sedating antipsychotic. So far I have had nothing but good experiences with it and no weight gain. It's a newer drug so it might be costly, but there is a coupon on to get your first prescription free and pay $15 per refill after that unless your copay is higher then $200, than you have to cover the difference. I had mild akathisia which resolved in a few days and thats the only side effects I have had so far. I say give Rexulti a try since, IME, I have no experienced any weight gain and I believe the incidence for weight gain is very low, so might be something you want to consider talking to your p. doc about. Best of luck!
  14. The Remeron (mirtazapine) will definitely help you eat, but it will likely make you extremely tired so you would have to take it at night, which means the appetite benefits might only be there right before you go to bed, at least IME. Seroquel is another one that increases your appetite but make you fall asleep while eating because of how powerful it is. I have always had trouble picking up weight and used to get comments about how skinny I was, until I asked my doctor about a medication called cyproheptadine, which has really helped me gain 20-25 pounds in the past 3-4 months so I highly recommend it. It is an anti-histamine but non-drowsy and actually indicated for anorexia. I highly recommend it and hope it works for you if you are able to get it prescribed! Here is a study about cyproheptadine and anorexia "Cyproheptadine was found to be effective in inducing weight gain in a subgroup of anorexia nervosa patients"
  15. Your p.doc can't even fill out prior authorization for either provigil of nuvigil? If not, I know Nuvigil offers a coupon for the first prescription free and refills as low as $5 ( I just looked up retail price of both provigil and nuvigil and it was around $60 and $75, respectively. I would take a look at the Nuvigil savings card and ask your doctor to write a script for it. Then take both the prescription and the Nuvigil savings card to the pharmacy and see if they are able to hook you up with the first month free and after that, $5 refills. But this is for brand name, not generic, so it likely would require prior authorization. If none of that works, and if you have the money to do it, I would suggest that you pay for the generic out of pocket (average goodRx price listed above). I hope this was somewhat helpful!