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About tryp

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    Bawk Bawk Therapy Cranes!

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    sleep, sanity, cats, trashy television, psychopharmacology

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  1. DBT is saving my life

    This thread looks great - I'll pin it and hopefully it will continue to be a resource for those of us practicing DBT
  2. DBT is saving my life

    DBT was really helpful for me too. I never did a full blown DBT program but I did a bit of group and a bit of individual. It really permanently changed the way I approach my emotions, which led to my being able to quit self harm (nearly 5 years now). It also made my depressions less frequent and less terrible in a way that medication never could I will say that it didn't address the underlying issues (mostly trauma) that I'm now working on in therapy, but it did get me to a place of greater stability in order to more effectively do the deeper work. We used to have a "today I used a DBT skill" thread that was a great resource. I'm not sure what happened to it, but if you wanted to start another one, that could be great for the community.
  3. I went as high as 600 mg on Seroquel and the sedation never got better. I was totally zonked at all times and sleeping 12+ hours per night. XR was not substantially better than IR for overall sleepiness, except that the XR didn't have that "hit you like a ton of bricks/immediate unconsciousness" that the IR had for me. It was pretty good for my PTSD though. I still take it as a PRN - my brain loves it. Way better than benzos for me. Just had to come off due to side effects (predominantly weight gain)
  4. It's a weak antihistamine (similar to how Benadryl makes you sleepy) and strong alpha adrenergic blocker. At the doses typically used for sleep, it's not nearly as serotoninergic as it is at higher doses, but there's some of that too.
  5. Is there another term for disorders?

    There isn't. That person was being picky and weird. Personality disorders are also MIs and what you said made total sense and was reasonable.
  6. It's not another way of saying "crazy" - or at least, not any more so than any other diagnosis (depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, etc.). Like any other diagnosis in psychiatry/psychology, it's just a name for a cluster of symptoms that occur together. If you feel that you are having symptoms that are making it hard for you to live your life, and want some treatment, the options broadly are medications and/or therapy. For a personality disorder without any other comorbidity, there isn't great evidence for medication, and therapy is the first line treatment. So if you feel like you could benefit from some help, maybe try to find a therapist you're more comfortable with? However, if you're not even sure of the diagnosis and don't feel comfortable with it, it may be worth seeing someone for another opinion. For one thing, it helps for someone to get to know you over multiple sessions to really feel confident that they've got a sense of you, especially if you had a big difficult event that was really influencing how you were feeling.
  7. Mood tracker apps

    I'm interested in this too - I haven't been able to find one that I really like. I do use the app PHQ-9 which is a standardized depression rating scale and I take it once a week. The only issue is, the history only goes back so far - it only keeps like the last however many scores, so you don't get as much data over time as I'd like. Same with PTSD Coach, which I also use.
  8. Yeah mostly they don't do the test unless you have symptoms.
  9. SSRIs are really idiosyncratic for that - there's none that will really do that in the way that the ones you mentioned will. Generally speaking, fluvoxamine tends to be the most sedating. The citaloprams (citalopram and escitalopram) are also on the calming side. Fluoxetine tends to be more stimulating, and sertraline as well to some extent. Not sure about paroxetine.
  10. I don't think it's creepy. Different doctors have different limits on what they accept - some accept no gifts at all and some are totally cool with it. I don't think $20 is universal at least where I am but "nominal value" is the most common boundary which a hat definitely is. I think it's a really sweet gift. I hope you're able to give it to her and she likes it.
  11. Honestly a ton of other stuff happened that did not help.
  12. I was honestly closer to harming myself this evening than I have been in years. I am so done.
  13. It depresses the absolute shit out of me. Every birthday for the past five years or so has just been more and more miserable. It reminds me that I have been unrelentingly and hopelessly single for five years with no prospects of getting married or having children, when everybody around me seems to be doing exactly that. Having a family is so important to me, and every birthday just rubs it in that I am one year closer to missing my chance, and that my fertility and the dating pool are both dwindling as we speak. I am so sick of hearing that I "still have a chance" and that "something will come along." NOTHING IS FUCKING COMING ALONG. It also reminds me that I am estranged from almost all of my family, including my father, who has not so much as sent a card in over 15 years. He did text me pre-emptively yesterday, presumably so he didn't have to contact me on the actual day. Furthermore, since I am turning 28 today, it marks 10 years/a decade since I stopped living with my parents (I hate the phrase "left home") and started trying to undo the damage of all of those years of abuse. And despite 10 years of basically relentless 110% effort, probably over a dozen different medications, and like seven therapists, I am still SUPER fucked up. All of this is only worsened by the expectation of everybody around me that I be happy. I don't even have the heart to disappoint people by telling them how miserable I am and how much I don't want to be alive. I wish people would stop asking me what I'm "doing for my birthday." "The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try not to fucking die." My birthday can go die in a fire. What the fuck do I even do with this shit?
  14. I agree with Ion - trauma has an aspect of subjectivity to it, and you'd be the best person to know if this incident was traumatic for you and needs to be worked through in therapy. Certainly if managing stress is a problem, perhaps some therapy focused on new ways of managing your stress in the present could be of use. But I feel like it would be questionable to go to therapy to talk about something that doesn't bother you. Seems like that would just make things worse.
  15. Hi Kona - Hard to know for sure - sounds complicated and distressing! Some people who work in trauma consider BPD to be a trauma-spectrum disorder alongside PTSD, complex PTSD, and the dissociative disorders, and conceptualize them on a spectrum of dissociation, and dissociation is a symptom both of PTSD (especially from prolonged or childhood abuse) and BPD. Not uncommon for BPD to come along with dysregulation in identity in the way that you describe - it seems to fall into the realm of dissociative symptoms/defences that come along with the whole complex trauma picture. I feel like sometimes anxious traumatized people (I am also anxious) suppress a ton of anger or whatever due to being afraid to offend people and then it sometimes just blows out in a way that feels totally foreign. I've had that experience myself.