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  1. I finally turned on the ac. My mood lifted. Today is a BIT better. lol. Not much. Still humid, muggy.
  2. muggy rainy smelly. lol
  3. Are you still on the generic, even at the 450xl? If so, and if possible, have your pdoc write a script for brand, they can put "medically necessary". It is the RELEASE method that may not be working for you on the generic. The bupropion is dumped out unevenly or all at once. I know many people who got way worse when switched to generic. However, many many people use the generic and it works fine. Everyone has different body chemistry. I take Aplenzin. The equivalent amount to Wellbutron 450 XL, and it is only ONE pill, not two. It is Aplenzin 522mg. The binder is different, though I don't know if that's makes any difference at all. With Welbutrin you have to take a 300XL and the 150 XL. Nonetheless, as notloki said, you have to give it at least 3 weeks. My side effects were all hyper related. I had to stop drinking coffee for a while, not drive for a couple of days. My gut instinct says your body does not like the generic.
  4. omy gosh, thank YOU so much @thunder and @sugarsugar You have NO idea how consoling it is to hear from you two. I am enjoying parts of this - and it is hard to understand because I have NOT been alone for so long. Even in my 20's and early 30's, I had roommates. YES YES YES YES. Me too. An extroverted introvert, or something to that effect. YES YES YES YES. lol. Right now, on vacation somewhere I have been going for over two decades, but this is the first time alone, I am thrilled when I wake up and can walk around doing whatever I want. I can go swimming and not worry about bringing food for everyone or who is coming to the river and who is not. So much of my mind is all about taking care of other people, this feels like freedom. Thank you for the food suggestions. For some reason, I am COOKING! The lady who owns the place keeps bringing me cucumbers and yesterday, a ginormous zucchini. This morning, I am making a frittata. I don't know why, but I seem to have broken through the cooking barrier. Probably because my life is not surrounding me here and everything is simpler. Hopefully when I go home, it will transfer over. Today, my biggest issue is whether to go for a swim or a hike. Bless you both for living alone, lol. I know this has nothing to do with being lonely. I needed to hear it from other people. I am very independent, I have a full life, it is only my treacherous mind telling me I am bereft. Eventually, hopefully, someone will come into my life for love and other things, :}, but....until that happens I am living alone with the kitties, and that is something to treasure for now.
  5. On my own on vacation. So far so good. I answered some of the questions. 1. Eating better - Frozen Amy Indian organic meals. Tahini and rice cakes. Lots of cucumbers and onions which I love and can cutup easily. Rotisserie Chicken. Stuffed grape leaves. Big hunk greek cheese which does not upset my stomach. Bags of gluten free chips which I think ARE upsetting my stomach. lol 2. I started writing in my journal again. All the little demonish thoughts that creep out. AND, I realized that before I wasn't really talking to myself out loud. I was talking to my critical voice. NOW I am talking to me! 3. Being absolutely alone in the woods has turned out to be easier than being alone at home. Nothing around but my books, art supplies, the river and bed. Not much to stress me out. HOWEVER, I got depressed last night. The existential shit. Why I am doing this? Who the fuck am I anyway? I am a useless piece of crap doing nothing for the world. Same demons that get me at home. So I went to sleep very early, and woke up. FIne. Like at home. I am a little nervous now, but not much.
  6. @shimmeree just saw this thread. I have endured an essential tremor as long as I remember. They called it a "familial tremor". Mostly my hands, but also head, neck at times. My siblings have it as well. The neurologist said it was on the Parkinson's spectrum but at the bottom. My hands shake, like yours, when I am doing something with them. And if I am nervous, fugeddaboutit. lol All worse. I have been embarrassed about this tremor my whole effing life. Years ago my Pdoc gave me propranolol, along with a low dose of valium, for the tremor. I am a videographer of live performance and I cannot, cannot, have my hands shaking. I only used it when I had a shoot. Over a year ago I finally went to a neurologist for my migraines. He gave me a low dose of propranolol to take in the morning and night. It was AMAZING. I could not believe how much it helped my migraines. AND my tremor. Coffee, sugar, no protein/carbs in the morning, all this will make the tremor worse. But overall for the first time in my life, the tremor is so slight at times I don't even notice.