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Brian LeFevre

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About Brian LeFevre

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    Stunt Cock

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    Coastal Oregon
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    LGBTQ Monster Truck Rallies

    Creamed Corn

    Cajun Swamp Rock

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  1. A little late to the party, but I feel as though I can contribute to this topic as I have also been on the fence with my Wellbutrin(TM) use as of late. I’m Bipolar Type 1– with rage already being a constant throughout my 40-years on this cursed fucking planet. So... when this drug was first introduced into my system, it was fucking delightful. It was the only psych drug that got me out of a nasty 3-year funk, where all I did was hide inside of my mother’s house— agoraphobia and anxiety at an all-time high—unmedicated and putting everyone who came into contact with me through all kinds of verbal/emotional abuse. I could actually shower and groom myself like a normal human being again. it was fantastic. and then, like all good things: it came to an abrupt end. Mood stabilizer or not— Wellbutrin(TM) once set-me-off on some neighborhood children who called 911on me, on account of my chasing them down the street like a madman after they said unkind things to me. Four Police Officers came and took me to the clink; my poor mother had to cough-up $400 bucks to get me out. The entire neighborhood witnessed this humiliating scene. The parents of the children I chased after— rightfully so— were petrified of me. they came to my mother’s house while I was still in jail and told her that they “didn’t want any problems with me.” I also pulled a knife of the neighbors across the street one time over some bullshit. My mom took the brunt of a lot of these meltdowns. The completely unnecessary added stress to my near 60-year-old Mother at the time was a stone’s throw beyond unfair... although... I most admit that the sick and twisted part of me— which is somewhere around the 92% mark— kind of felt like this was a small dose of payback for the shitty childhood I had to endure as a youth. anyways... I’m not sure how my post turned into an episode of ‘VH-1 Storytellers’ (Google it children), but I’m sure I have a point somewhere in here. I just started taking Wellbutrin(TM) again close to 2-months ago— and with Depakote(TM) keeping a close eye on it— I still have my moments. Forget energy drinks and excessive caffeine use— the combo shoots-me-off—into the stratosphere... sometimes in a good way... but mostly in an agitated and ornery bad way. It’s seriously like trying to decide whether or not to break-up with an occasionally abusive lover because they fuck you really good. Honestly... I just try to enjoy the occasional hypomania from it. I’m no good at existing... and Wellbutrin(TM) helps me stumblebum my way around this currently torturous adventure I’m on. I like to enjoy the little things while I still can... before that one day comes not too far- off in to the distant future— and what’s left of my sanity finally conks-out and I find myself in a Sanitarium making fingerpaintings out of my own scat. I think I’ll start practicing now so I’m at least good at it. All of that shit may have just been my gift rearing it’s ugly head, but I’m pretty sure it was Wellbutrin(TM)that set-me-off.
  2. Depakote Rage

    These Doctors are just a little too lackadaisical in that area. No big deal, only human lives at stake here.
  3. Depakote Rage

    Thanks man. Appreciate that. Before my mind really started to betray me, I was a (struggling) comedian out in Hollywood. What a perfect time for my genetics to kick into over-drive and fuck me over, eh? my bipolar disorder was also discovered in a fun way as well... after assuring him otherwise— my PDoc at the time diagnosed me as merely depressed and prescribed me the little demon who goes by the name “Paxil.”— within days, I was hallucinating... shadowy, demonic forces kept telling me to kill myself, etc. funky times. When I contacted the Doctor’s office, the no good sonofabitch couldn’t even be bothered to get on the horn after I was on hold for 15-mins... as the Dark Lord gave me intricate details in my ear on the easiest method to play the violin on my wrists with a Gillette Sensor. (Creepy how brand names are automatically capitalized on IPhones, etc., as if they are state capitals or something) anyways... His secretary called me back a few mins later and simply told me to “stop taking it IMMEDIATELY.”— never mind the trace amounts that had built-up within my brain over the course of a week or so. Looking back at that whacky situation, it’s clearly obvious that the good Doctor did what he did to cover his own asshole... as I’m sure there must have been some illegality in his dismissive attitude toward what I was told by other mental health professionals over the years that I may be bipolar... genetics, irratic behavior and the like. I just refused official diagnoses and meds mainly based-off of the nightmarish stories I’d heard years’ previously about the latter. besides... before the hypo was deducted from my mania, it was a great motivator for what I was pursuing professionally... especially creatively. I also am on Wellbutrin... boy, do I have some tales of taking that stuff sans mood stabilizer. Another time perhaps.
  4. Anyone else experience this? I’ve been on it for approximately two weeks and have felt a noticible shift in how I react to people/things that I perceive as annoying; especially people staring at me... drive-by tough guys who never pull-over and say dick to my face... well, not LITERALLY “dick,” as that would actually be quite amusing actually— but incoherent nonsense at 70-plus Mph. Do they even realize that their intended ignorance does not even register to my ears? It’s a highway for fuck’s sake... the constant flow of lumberjacks toting a thousand logs 24/7 doesn’t help their cause. just pull-over and whisper it into my ear... let’s make it fun. At least I’ll respect you. I mean... I get it, the destitute are always gonna be looked down-upon, but now I’m imagining myself in jail for yanking some redneck from his vroom-vroom and punching his teeth through his asshole. I reported these types of feelings to my P-doc yesterday and he didn’t seem too concerned; as a matter of fact, he RAISED the daily dosage to three times a day. Good lord. He gave me limited Klonopin to chill-me-the-fuck-out until I see a Psychiatrist— via fucking webcam, mind you— and patted me on the ass and sent me on my merry little way. Speaking of my FaceTime Headshrinker— what the fuck? How impersonal is that shit? How can you diagnose(or re-diagnose) someone from within the restricted confines of a computer screen? I also had a disability case via said method and It was bullshit. I’m no medical professional here... but one would assume that as a Psychiatrist, you would need to evaluate said mental patient’s body movements, etc., in order to make the proper diagnoses. Whatever. ive gotta take what I can get at this point... perhaps I’ll take advantage and sneak my prick-out of my pants during the session and give it a few tugs. And she’ll never know. So... SHHHHHHHHH. all right... I’m talking gibberish again. bye.
  5. I wish just reissued Wellbutrin after getting “stabilized” on Depakote first for a couple of weeks or so. I am trying to only take the latter at night— as it gives me massive fog head during the daytime— but if I don’t take them together, I find myself experiencing the same symptoms... and worse. for example: doing violent squat-thrusts on my neighbor’s lawn at 3 AM, and then accusing him of being a hybrid Alien when he awoke from his slumber and confronted me. (Psssssst. Just between us... I still think he is and plan to fucking PROVE IT.) otherwise: Wellbutrin 300 XL was the only drug to get me out of bed after a severe 3-year tussle with clinical depression. I wasn’t well groomed then... homeless now, and I am better groomed. I couldn’t even bring myself to brush my teeth but once or twice a week. goddamn that was a long post response... Sorry, it’s the WB. Took it sans Depakote this AM with a couple of 400 MG Neurontin... Prior to checking-in on my account, I was just doing bare-knuckle push-ups on the playground concrete, much to the horror of the surrounding parents. Fuck them— I cannot afford a gym membership. not sure how any of this nonsense relates to your post outside of Wellbutrin... but good luck!
  6. So the Aliens don’t come while I’m sleeping and steal my dreams so they can sell them to Hollywood as script ideas. But mainly so I can stay functional, etc....
  7. Homeless? Or Minimalist?

    I’m trying to respond to you, gb84... but apparently I’m too retarded to do so properly without merging with the other comment. nonetheless— appreciate the read and the comment.
  8. Homeless? Or Minimalist?

    Thank you kindly. I’m glad it made you smile.
  9. I am too ignorant to know how to delete this post.