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Found 73 results

  1. Hello people, I was wondering what life lessons you've learned and wish to convey to someone who has just become bipolar. It has only been 1.5 year since I had my first (hypo)mania where I destroyed my life tremendously. Everything is ok now, but I know it won't be that way forever. I noticed that I still have a long way ahead of me. This isn't only for me, but for the people who have been recently diagnosed or people that need some good advice.
  2. Uhm I was wondering what Panic Attack Disorder and General Anxiety Disorder really are. My therapist said that she thinks I have Panic Attack Disorder and i dont really understand what that means. Of course it has to deal with panic attacks but could you explain exactly what a panic attack is? I don't know if I'm having a Panic attack or something else. If she corresponds to it, I'm 13 years old. Please don't suspect me as a attention seeker. Also, will people think it's weird for me to have a disorder like those? The only disorders some people have at my school are ADD and Adhd. I want to be a detective and will disorders bring me down?
  3. I was on Latuda 20 mgs for awhile and it seemed to be alright. I was bumped up to 40 mgs to just help with mood and the dreaded akathisia started. I want to die when it really kicks in. My Nurse Practitioner prescribed Propranolol and it worked for a week at 10 mgs twice a day, until last night I kept moving around so much I wanted to bash my head in a wall. I called her today and she upped it to 20 mgs twice a day. I see her Monday, but I am also for the weekend only taking 20 mgs again with the Latuda. Has anyone else had this experience with Latuda, and does it stop? Or am I, yet again, going to have to find another medication to rely on? Currently I am on Latuda 40 mgs, Propranolol 20 mgs, Paxil 10 mgs, Buspar 5 mgs.
  4. Day two of a hypomanic episode and idk how much longer I can deal with it. On top of that I got into a fight with a friend that ended with him saying that I'm dead to him. Taking tomorrow off work to see my psych but I'm worried I won't get in. Have any of you called in last minute? I'm worried about that more than anything. I know I'll deeply regret burning another bridge but right now I just want to focus on feeling better.
  5. Hi guys, it has been awhile.... Well, my OCD germaphobe habits are starting to tick badly again. I think it is the result of my actually going over to another person's place. OMG, right? I've been a couple of times and try to be polite, but I can't wait to leave and clean myself like crazy!!! This was before they got a pet. And this is the kicker...the last time I was over their pet made a mess on the floor, and they picked up the mess BUT DID NOT CLEAN THE FLOOR. For a moment I was literally paralyzed because I had to cross over that area to get to another spot. I pretended to shake it off, but for the rest of the visit I kept thinking about all the germs that could be on that carpet from now and before. It was horrible. I wanted to trash all my clothes. Now I am reluctant to visit again, but I can't really ignore this person. So this is the problem. I told them at a previous visit (before the whole mess thing) that I was "a bit of a germaphobe." They were a little incredulous, but now I need to seriously tell them that this is a problem for me, but I'm not sure how. I have offered time and again to give them a pet carpet cleaner, but they decline. And I really don't want to go over there again because in my mind everything is contaminated. It wasn't so bad before the pet (well it was bad) but now.... Any ideas? I'd be glad to hear them. Until then I'll be alienating "dirty" clothes, showering, washing my hands, lysol spraying the doorknobs, and glaring at people who sneeze in public. Poem
  6. hello i dont really know where to post this but im having a sort of breakdown of sorts and i really dont know who i am. at all i feel like i'm all fake and i feel like im faking everything on a subconscious level. ive been struggling for a while with alot of mood swings and anxiety about friends and family and paranoia and i just i feel like im faking everything and i feel like im not me i feel like im just. pieces of other people put together and im so scared that im not real im fake.i dont know what to do im sorry
  7. hello. i also need help with,, bipolar like symptoms i have mood swings at the tiniest things. i'm so happy! i feel so great, im talking alot and being happy but then all of a sudden i cant do something i want to do and i drop super bad and then even five minutes after id be happy again i have bad relationships with people and i. feel like people hate me if they dont laugh loud enough at a joke i tell. i have paranoia that everyone talks about me and how bad i am and that they're all lying. i have bad relationships were i usually obsess over a certain person, and i never really hang out with anyone else but them. if they dont comfort me, then they hate me. id hate them but then after the arguments over they're my favourite person in the world im sorry if i sound incoherent im not great at the moment my ex described me once as "being one way one moment then something else the next" or somethn and whenever i get really happy about stuff i like my brother tells me im being hyper n stuff and it usually brings my mood down because i dont want to be annoying, anyway sorry. any advice would be helpful. i'm 15 and im diagnosed with depression & GAD. ive been trying to get a proper re-diagnosis because i havent been going to school because i just. feel like i cant have healthy relationships with anyone and its just scary. thank you for any help you give me,
  8. So, my friends and family keep mentioning I sleep too much. I nap, A lot. I'll nap and want another nap, i'll sleep in, wake up and then nap like two hours later at times. Etc. Other b.s. I've always thought it was just a lot of my depression problems, since depressed people can sleep a lot. I feel fatigued frequently, usually I know if I wanna go to bed I need to read something. It'll put me to sleep. if I'm slightly drowsy, only though. It's hard for me to concentrate at times, and i've had really bad nightmares that seemed so real that I've woken up in the middle of the night crying/screaming. I took the symptom screener on morethantired from the commercials, and my scores were 5 and 16. This is where I'm confused, on the 16 score it said something about high negative scores? Or something like that? Has anyone else taken it or know what it means? Because 16 isn't negative, but my results said I should see a sleep specialist. I need to know what to do. i'll have to find one that takes Medicaid, there's only one where I live. The others are in the DFW area - not shocking but I can get Medicaid transport to take me or something like they said they could if i'm out of town for an appt. What are your experiences with Narcolepsy? Can you explain for me? I just need to know if I should get tested or not, I don't wanna waste the appt. and Medicaid's time if it's nothing. But people worry that i'm napping from like 3-5 and then 7-9 at night. I sleep MORE than eight hours, I wake up the days my boyfriend works arounf 2ish to make him breakfast and pack his lunch for work. The days he doesn't work, we sleep. Needless to say my schedule is inconsistent. I felt a little better with the structured sleep schedule, sleeping at 9 waking up at 6-7 am. But I'm a night owl, I don't like going out during the day as I don't much like people and their stupid tendency to do things or at least the ones around me. I do my grocery shopping at night, because someone is almost ALWAYS running into me. And I get paid at night sometimes, or my boyfriend does. It's just preferred. Unless it's a store only open certain hours, unlike Walmart. The sunlight kind of pisses me off, and gives me headaches. I'm suppose to wear glasses because I've got an Astigmatism but lost two pairs two years ago, and need to go back and get more and a new test. I like the dark, and doing things in it. So, I rather not be up during the day unless I've got to be. I won't leave me house earlier than 5pm MAYBE,
  9. For the past 2 weeks I have been stuck in a rut. I don't know what caused it, but I can't get myself out. 3 nights ago, I was home and I just felt getting sucked into it deeper and deeper. I called my boyfriend, because I felt like if I were to stay home that night I would've done something bad. So I drove to his house. On my way over, I was overflown with dark thoughts. I kept thinking about driving my car off the highway or runing into a truck. Nobody would know that I did it with my own will. I could've made it look like an accident. I was so close to doing it. But somehow I stopped myself. I still don't know how. Now everytime I get into my car I keep having those thoughts. I didn't tell my boyfriend, because I would just scare him. He was already worried about me, because I wasn't reacting to anything. It was like I wasn't there. The next day I woke up, feeling better, but during the day it got worse again. I can't get myself out of this rut. I don't know why I'm here. I don't know why I'm typing this post. It's not like anyone can really help me. I have no reason to be suicidal - I'm not suicidal, but why did I have those thoughts. I can't believe how close I came to crashing my car. I even scared myself.
  10. Putting ice down my shirt drawing where I want to cut Going straight to bandaging Snapping a rubber band against my skin Biting my lip Squeezing where my scars are Writing in morbid detail where and how I'd like to cut Imagining cutting myself Tracing scars in pen taking a cold shower I do all of these EVERY DAY, yet I still self harm close to 5 times a day. Please tell me your strategies
  11. I have the view signature switch on in settings but still not seeing any...what am I doing wrong?
  12. Basically what the title says. Also, how old we you at the time. Obviously looking for responses from teenager years more than anything.
  13. Hi! I'm new to the board and I'm not even sure if this is the right place to post this. I was diagnosed with bipolar at age 20 but mostly I had depressive episodes. Some years later my episodes changed to light mood swings with hallucinations, delusions and "strange behavior" like wearing wigs and sunglasses to distract the people I thought was chasing me. In the current "episode" I have no mood alterations I just started to feel sure I was going to die soon. Like a hunch. Shortly after that I started seeing angels that visit me because I'm gonna die soon. I also hear a voice that tells me I'm about to die. I'm not depressed or manic I just feel my mind jumbled and confused. I was admitted in a psychiatric hospital but I checked out before they could diagnose (mostly because I needed my cigarrettes. I'm a chain smoker). I don't know if that's possible in America but here you can chek out of psychiatric hospitals pretty much whenever you want. Anyway, is this psychosis? Bipolar? Does my situation has a name?
  14. This is amazing. I've been labled depemding where ive been (prison,jail,psych,rehab,clinics) with borderline bipolar, depression, add, Ptsd and borderline personality. No one can tell me what I am. Prolly the reason for such a fucked life led by myself calling all the shots. I'm fucking broken and need help. I know most here are not Dr's, like 99 percent lol. But, I'd love some sort of feedback. I'm 26 parents both hate me for constant raging outbursts. Just left, more like kicked out, of my son's mothers house. I burn down anything I touch. I feel no empathy twprds other and throw around that I don't feel ever. I don't have feels. This is untrue cus I can easily fall in love and stay this way for months to years. It takes that person to do me wrong, or what I view as wrong for me to unlove them. I resented my son for the first 6 mos of his life and hated myself for it. I'm always always there for him even with the split, altho I get tired of him fast. My current gf has anxiety bad. Like cry yell dominate and take over everyone's attention. But I love her so so much meds or not. I have terrible issues with people looking at questions and not replying to me. I can also lose all happiness at the turn of a switch, for the smallest reason. Anything else anyone's wondering ask away. Looking for 100 percent feedback. Oh shit Dr has me on seroquel for moods currently searching Vyvanse or Adderall to pair. Previouslytaken effexor, lithium, thorzine, zoloft, xanax, valum, Prozac, welbutrin ect......
  15. Hey I am an 19 year old male who has recently began to lose his mind I used to be a witty charming teen starting out until I was bullied into becoming a social outcast. I dated a girl with bi polar disorder and she made me go on an emotional roller coaster with her until I got fed up and left her and then I was made to look like the bad guy I lost all my friends and now live in perpetual fear of losing control over a situation or lose friends. I left High School only with bitter memories, no one wanted to be associated with me and ever talked to me because they felt sorry for me. in college I entered at 17 years old, I was in Army ROTC my grades weren't the best but I had friends finally and a good activity to do. I ended up dating a girl who mentally abused me and even bullied me into feeling inferior she even blamed me for rape when she changed her mind about what we did the night before. I was kicked out of ROTC and lost all my friends again. With nothing left I did what any sane person would do. I joined the Marines shipped out for boot camp and endured almost 3 months of hell until one day I broke both of my legs and parts of my back after a training exercise. I came back home feeling like a failure again. I let all my friends down in my platoon because I couldn't finish I came home back to an overcrowded apartment with 11 people living here with my parents. I've been in and out of work I was academically dismissed from college. No college has even responded to my submitted applications and it's been 3 months I can't live anymore knowing all throughout my teen years everyone else was happy and I wasn't I was always going through something. Recently I've been having thoughts of suicide, my romantic interest joined the marines too and has diverted her attention to someone else who suits her more because I'm a nasty civilian and she's a marine as she puts it dating sucks for me because I don't know what to say or how to act and I always get the awkward silence to kill everything for me I can't afford to move out of my parents overcrowded apartment I've lost all my social life (what was left of it) and so I've come here to ask for help because counseling didn't help recently I've been so depressed and feeling so helpless and worthless like I'm taking up space, I've been eating less and staying holed up in what I call a hell hole with only games and myself to keep me company almost like if I've hit rock bottom and this is the end of the line. Me a grown ass man cries himself to sleep every night while during the day I wear a fake smile and fake emotions just to seem normal
  16. Hi everyone, I edited this post because I decided it would be better to leave particulars out. However, I know someone who I suspect may be on the Schizoid continuum and was wondering if those of you with that diagnoses would be willing to share their experiences with the disorder. Can you be social, even though you don't want to be? Do you absolutely prefer to be alone and shun social contact, or have a few people that you can tolerate in your life? How does it feel inside, or better yet how do you try to express your internal state? Do you feel split? Do you crave a connection with others, but can't act on it? Sorry for all the questions. I just want answers "straight from the horse's mouth" so to speak. Thank you, Poem
  17. I'm scared. I've been taking lamictal and mirapex for about three weeks now. I've been increasing my dose of lamictal each week. I started at .25 mg 2x/day and now I am taking .25mg 3x/day. I started crying in the last 2 days. Once at work and once at a party. Will this get better as my dosage increases? My psychiatrist hasn't gotten back to me and I can't have this happen at work. I have read some posts and noticed others have had similar crying episodes. Why might this be? I also don't feel like going anywhere. I prefer to stay at home. And it doing anything to help with bipolar? I would like to know if there is somebody out there who take both of these medications and if it has helped with bipolar 2. Thank you.
  18. So these past 2.5 days I've had that really panicky feeling where I'm going to cry but then I don't and I can't breath because I'm so scared and then I'm fine and I can't function and suddenly I can. I don't know what's happening, I'm going to be going out with a friend in a few days and I'm out with my granddad tomorrow and I'm terrified I'm going to have a panic or anxiety attack when I am out. I'm so scared, I don't know how to tell my mum about it, and I'm at my grandparents house and they mock me for my anxiety. I've been looking for support on the #AlwaysKeepFighting community but that seems to make me more anxious which is a shame because I love that community so much (check it out, seriously). What's happening? What do I do?
  19. Hey all, So lately I have been having troubles accessing the site. Any time I try to log in, it says my account is locked (presumably due to failed attempts--although that happened some time ago). So, I decided to reset my password to see if that would help ameliorate the issue. It did, temporarily. Now, however, any time I wish to access the site (which in the MI world can be a very, very pressing issue), it still tells me I'm locked out and I have to proceed to "reset my password" any time I wish to log on. It works, again temporarily, and the next attempted login I am once again locked out. Can anyone please help me with this issue? I've attempted talking to a moderator who didn't know much of the technical issues of the site, and a couple of days ago, even sent an e-mail to the "Contact Us" link at the bottom of the website but have yet to recieve a response. Can anyone help me? Obviously, I still have access to the site, but its unneccearily time-consuming, and potentially fairly dangerous and frustrating when I'm trying to seek help during an episode. Please help. -Alice
  20. So, I decided to make an account because I wanted to get some ideas about what I can do to stop some of the pain of Klonapon withdrawl. I am not a substance abuser and I was perscribed clonazepam since I was 12, right now I am on a .25mg taper I take once at night which has been a little over a month now, and I started at .5mg for about 10 months , I was on a higher dosage prier to that taking 10 mg for the rest of my earlier young life taking it. I am 22 now, and most of the symptoms now seem to be under control except throughout the day I still feel a rapid heart beat, though my bpm is 62 and my blood pressure is normal, I got blood tests done and an ekg, everything seemed fine there, so I was wondering if there are any non narcotic suppliments that do not interfer with the withdrawl recovery process, and things I can do to keep my head on straight about my issues+ things that help anxiety, I would also like to know how long I should be expecting to feel palputations? Thank you =)
  21. ⚠️ Cutting/self mutilation Cutting and self mutilation is so stupid! There are people out there who probably have it so much harder than we, as a first world country, do. There are Rape victims Domestic abuse victims People who barely have enough money to feed their families People who go to bed hungry every night People who's parents have died People who live on the streets People who sell their body's just for a meal. Just to make money. People who are bullied and beaten every day at their schools People who have been sexually abused. People who have legit mental issues. Cutting is something you have to carry with you your whole life. Something you have to live with. You carry those scars with you. Self harm is unjustifiable. Instead of picking up a razor, pick up the phone and get help from a medical professional. Get help. There are people that love you and would not want to see you hurt. So please get help instead of harming yourself. Don't be scared to tell people. The world is a harsh place, but you have to learn not to let things get under your skin. Take in the good things in life. Find something that makes you happy. Don't worry about what anybody else thinks. Screw them! Their opinions matter, if you make them matter. Think of your future. How long will this situation last? You are a beautiful human being. Don't let your circumstances control you. If there are people telling you to stop, listen to them. By telling you to stop they are showing that they care about you and your health. Be happy with what you have, don't take things for granted. Focus on the good and clear out the negative. Please put the razor down, and talk to a trusted friend, or adult. Realize that you need help, and go get it. Hotlines: *1-800-DON'T-CUT – More info on self-injury * – Referrals for therapists and tips for how to stop. *1-800-273-TALK – A 24-hour crisis hotline if you're about to self-harm or are in an emergency situation. *To Write Love On Her Arms ( - A non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide. *1-800-SUICIDE – Hotline for people contemplating suicide. *1-800-334-HELP – Self Injury Foundation's 24-hour national crisis line. *1-800-799-SAFE – Domestic violence hotline. *1-877-332-7333 – Real Help For Teens' help line. plase realize that you are loved, you are needed. Please no hate. I understand it may be hard to stop, but you have to learn that what you are doing is wrong, and that there are people who want to help. There are people who love you, and hate that you are hurting yourself. -much love, jade.e💕
  22. Hello My name is David Webbster and I believe have several mental issues, yet none of them is comfirmed by a doctor of any means. I'm in a situation where I cannot seek help in my own environment so I came here for help. I'm not looking for an advice such as "ask a proffessional to help" because I cannot. The main problem I have is that I don't feel happiness in my life. Never. I cannot remember the last time I did. I did not feel any form or pleasure in situations such as Any form of social interaction When the things I do get recognised and/or apprechiated by anyone [ Eg. My two bosses and 21 coworkers all applauding for me because I've done a great job about our recent project.] I don't even know what else to put on the list because I have no idea what makes other people 'happy'. I've searched online far and wide to find anything that could help but only found diagnoses and unreliable tests.
  23. I need help in cutting like self harm guidance I'm totally new to this. I'm all alone have no friend. I'm from asia my age is 22. There is no one who knew about my SI.
  24. I'm not really dating this guy, but we're in the talking stage, we've been talking since October 17th. We don't have tons in common, but when we first met i felt a spark. And that first night, the idea of sleeping in the same bed made me upset honestly. Like i've never hated the idea so much. We've had a few fights, started by me...oops? I get paranoid easy and keep thinking he's ignoring because I'm kind of clingy. But I don't feel the butterflies as much as I did in the beginning. We have a good sex life, we have the same morals, and I see myself having kids with guy and getting married later on. The thought of leaving him DESTROYS me and makes me wanna cry. At one point it didn't but now it does, it really does. I feel like he's all I know. I had this same problem with my first real boyfriend in the beginning. We have our first date this coming weekend and i'm actually super excited. He loves me for me, and has no problem with how I look or act. The good thing about us being opposite is i' m like a turtle in a shell and he is trying to break me of that. He's a country boy and i'm like a goth/metalhead. I like this different lifestyle I get introduced to, and I really wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with him. I really only get butterflies when I see him, and I'm not...fighting with him. I've read so many articles that it's normal to not feel the butterflies after awhile but I know with my paranoid schizo and bpd...and anxiety...and not being on my meds...for..weeks...oops..probably doesn't help. HELP?!
  25. So, lately, I’ve been feeling really off. I feel disconnected from the world, I do things without thinking and I can’t concentrate. I feel like I’m going crazy. I’m only 13 so I know most people are going to say “its just puberty related”, but it doesn’t feel like it. I self-diagnosed myself with depression and anxiety about a year ago (by researching symptoms and comparing them to how I felt). I know depression and anxiety are common at my age so I don’t really worry that much about them, except when it gets really bad. I self harmed for a while then quit because I saw no point in hurting myself when it didn’t even help me, but lately I’ve started again. And I don’t really know the reason, but while I’m doing it, I know it makes me feel happy to see what I’ve done to myself even if after I know I’ll regret it. It started at the beginning of the school year. At first I was just really giddy and my thoughts were everywhere, my behavior confused me though. But I thought maybe it was just the excitement of seeing my friends again and the nervousness that this was my last year before high school, but the weirdness continued. A while later I began to have very violent thoughts-some towards myself, some towards others. That really terrified me. My brain started to feel really murky and I would always drift off into trances. I can barely concentrate on anything now, conversations are short and I’m very easily angered and offended. My hands are almost always cold and my whole body is often very shaky. I react to things the opposite of how I should most of the time, like for example, when I get yelled at I find it funny and I often laugh or smile. I’m always tired. At night it’s the worst. I always feel like there’s something watching me from the shadows, observing me and laughing at me. I have to distract myself from my thoughts to sleep, so I watch YouTube or read mostly, until I feel like I can sleep. But even then I find myself thinking strange things. When I wake up, I always feel like I didn’t get enough sleep even though I know I have. I always feel dizzy and sometimes it almost feels like I’m dreaming, but I know I’m not. I get these weird pains all over my body. I get headaches and I never really feel like doing necessary things (eating, getting up in the morning, going to school, etc.). In fact, my efforts in school have dropped drastically. I used to strive to get good marks and rush to get my homework done on time, but now I just don’t care. I haven’t really told anyone yet because I just don’t feel comfortable but I know I need help. I find myself having conversations with the air and myself without realizing what I’m doing. I just feel really, well, crazy. Now, most of this just sounds like depression, right? But I just don’t know. I feel like I’m going insane. I told myself to give it another week to talk to someone. I just don’t feel like myself. I feel like I’m in a different world most of the time. Even now, while I’m writing this, I feel like I’m drifting. Anyway, I’m just posting this in case anyone is going through the same thing and/or knows what’s happening.