Middle-Aged Men and Younger Women?

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Posted

as a "younger woman" (28 as of tomorrow), i've often wondered why older men (40+) date me and not women their own age. be honest now! are you just getting another motorcycle, what is the allure?

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Posted

Younger women are less jaded than older women. Older men like the energy of younger women. Older men miss the youthful figures of younger women.

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Posted (edited)

Motorcycles

AND

Younger Women?

A good

Combination.

Gonna stick

with Women,

Damned Bikes

Have had their

pounds of Flesh.

Although,

a good mid-seventies

Italian motorcycle,

A Guzzi

or a desmo-Ducati (Desmodromic,man)

a three-cylinder Laverda.

Drool,

Young women,

I Love to watch,

esp. the ones whose

Beauty is

Subtle.

Stasis,

I'm not getting dressed And you can't make me.

Edited by Stasis

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Posted

When I hit the dating secne in the mid 80's I always dated older women but none of them were over 28. At 17 I was dating a 24 year old for 6 months and I broke it off. Now im 35 and I still check out the ladies min their mid/late 20's. I have alot of older feamale friends 40's- late 50's. Some of them are really hot looking laidies but could I have a relationship with them beyond friends NO. I personally think most guys have a hard time from 35-45 because you just cant grasp your age (I know I can't) one day your 25 then bam your 40. I know for me if I see an hot bodied 18-22 year old it will get my atention but thats it I automatically go man she is still a baby, followed by where were those bodies when I was 18. LOL

I also know for me my mom was in her 40 when she had me so growing up (mom in her late 40's early 50's ) All women in that age group were mother/parent figures

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Posted

Agree with Crazycuda. One day you're mid/late 20's, then Bam! you're a middle aged fart. Look around and you wonder ho wso many women your age seem to have let themsleves go (don't look in the mirror too close, though).

Turning the question around: Loon, why do younger women go for older men?

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Posted

For the first time, I'm dating a much older man. I think it is mostly because of who we are rather than the age difference.

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Posted (edited)

as a "younger woman" (28 as of tomorrow), i've often wondered why older men (40+) date me and not women their own age. be honest now! are you just getting another motorcycle, what is the allure?

Okay, I know you want to hear from guys here, but I'm going to butt in anyway (44 year old women love to talk about this shit).

I think that alot of people in their forties and fifties find people in their late 20's to mid 30's very attractive. For many people 30-ish is a time when you've gained life-experience and have a sense of self, but still have your youthful health, energy and physical attractiveness. Y'all can carry on an intelligent conversation and also still have shiny hair, caressable skin and grabable asses. It's ideal!

What I think is funny, though, my observation is that the older men would really enjoy having a relationship of some length with a younger women, but my forty-something women friends are definitely only looking for a week or two max with a younger guy.

It supports the whole cave-man theory, with men wanting younger women, both for sex and status. It's amazing how extremely impressed some guys are by a middle-aged peer who can 'get' an intelligent and attractive younger woman to be his girlfriend. In the reverse scenario, I've found that women may be jealous of their peer, but not necessarity 'impressed' by her ability to get with a younger guy.

But of course, generalizations aren't worth a damn (including this one).

I must say, though, that until last year I only found men my age or older attractive, but lately I have been appreciating the beauty of some of those volley ball players I see down at the beach ;) .

-- B

edited to add my perv for volley ball players.

Edited by Bumble

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Posted

hi,

im in my 30's and could certainly take a man for a week. preferably a 22 yo with a nice ass. ;)

like he's gonna wanna do a fat baby-ized woman. but i can dream.

db

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Posted

first wave boomer/geezer! totally impossible to gauge age of others +/- 15 yrs. all old ass white people look the same. have avoided shaving in front of mirror since my shit turned grey or fell out. some pug ugly image there.

can appreciate the beauty that young women have going on. have no symmetry or what ever defines good looks. rather physically busted up. goes without saying that brains are right in line.

it has remained a conundrum and a source of joy; that there have been some beauty women in my life. give the ugly mutt some!

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Posted

Hello friend,

You've got me laughing so hard!!! Oh my God! It feels so GOOD to laugh and experience joy!.

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Posted

My husband is 44 and I'll be 29 next month.

We met a month past my 19th birthday and he was 34. Age has never really meant anything to us. I was especially mature for a 19yr. old and he still felt like an early 20something. He still feels like he's in his 20s. Sometimes I feel older than him!

I think being less jaded and a bit more naive at that age may have been part of the appeal. He never dated anyone younger at the time. He still makes fun of me for the naive things I said at that age. Now he asks "When did you get so jaded?"

We have fun with the age difference now...I still look 19 and I once called him "Dad" at a store checkout. If I complain about his driving, he reminds me that he was driving before I was born. ;)

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Posted

Get this! I have dated a man who is 71 and I am 30! He has sons who are old enough to be my father!

blackbird

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Posted (edited)

There's also a significant age difference between my partner (older male) and I (younger female) ;) Smaller than your gap, Blackbird, but still big enough to raise some eyebrows.

What drew us together was more personality and shared common interests, than anything else. If you'd said to me a few years ago that my partner would be a middle-aged, balding man, I would've laughed in incongruity. I would've said that it would never happen - but it did. If you'd told him that he would be dating someone younger, he probably would have reacted in the same way as I would.

I guess what happened with me was I found that personality matters A LOT MORE than looks, money or status. All of those can fade but someone's personality remains. My partner also doesn't act his age and it's partly due to his outlook in life. Him and I have the same views on many issues. We have our differences as well but we're sensible enough to agree to disagree.

Besides...I knew it was love when I did some crazy things to him but he still forgave me :)

Edited by grrl_away

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Posted

I think the other question here is why do younger girls date older men?

I know the in my past I have only dated older men, at leat 5 years older than me, my so now is 10 years older, I dont think I ever really dated some one my age. (I never really thought about that till now)

I dated a guy when I turned 18 who was 30, he partied way too much ended up crashing his eagle talon at 60 mph in to a wall divider at the entrance of a tunnel.

Men like younger women, it makes them feel young (I am talking about the single not serious guys not any of your SO's) they like eye candy as well, the girl is their trophy, in their head they're thinking, I may be going through a mid life crisis but look at the girls I can still get ;)

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Posted

most guys my age (22 next month) are completely immature jerkfaces.

just total jackasses who haven't gotten over themselves enough to actually notice or appreciate another person's company or know enough about themselves to decide what direction they want to go let alone figure out what direction to go with someone else.

I'm really tired right now, and not all guys are like this-- I know that-- but it doesn't change the fact that a whole TON of them are. I made the mistake of dating down a year or so...not going there--GAH...but not a good move.

never again. most of my friends and I have decided to just date up in age-- guys take a LOT longer to get to the maturity level that they need in order to actually function in a relationship than most girls I know.

for better or for worse, trust me that I'm a helluva lot older than a guy exactly my age.

again, generalizations, tired, rambling generalizations, but no way in hell am I dating younger than me for a goooood loooooooong time and that's that. gah. perhaps will come back when slept and ADDmedded, hmm?

night,

m

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Posted (edited)

Bah. I'm coming into this late. And I have zero experience (dating younger women) beyond the obscenely rare moments when some under 35 gorgeous creature flirts with me in a checkout line.

I have this thing that age 23-25 is a woman's initial premium hotness age... this recurs at various times over and over again. My wife was unbelievably hot looking then, then again @28-32, then again @35-38, and recently @44. "hotness" too is more than physical appearance. First-look beauty is truly skin deep. Pure unmitigated hotness comes up from deep down. I dunno.

The trophy thing everyone talks about is actually pretty unusual. My single male friends who date "youngish" women aren't out for a trophy at all. They just want someone who knows who they are but still cares to give a damn about him. My mate basically said fuck off recently. It sucks. Especially because I still want her as much as ever but it ain't reciprocal. I hear a lot of women my age talk jaded about men and they've bugged out as a result. At lot of guys my age have hit the wall with their women. They still want to adore her but she's done. I don't get it.

A few years ago, when I was in college round deux, a twenty-something flirted the hell out of me for a whole semester. All it did was depress me because I knew it was merely play and nothing would or could ever come of it. It was the energy in her that was so appealing. It's tough to age, you get beat down a hell of a lot. Meanwhile at home, I had an angry bitter mate whom I still adored and felt stupid for feeling that way because she acts like I'm the worst guy on the planet ever--but refuses to get a divorce and won't say why.

Oh, and I had to sell my BMW1250RT to finish school & get my kid a shrink. It was a sweet "old fart's sport ride." I miss it. My mate however, is glad I got rid of that "damnable thing." Ugh.

Edited by JackBQuick

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Posted

My husband is 10 years older than me.

I find a lot of things really appealing about it, honestly. For one, he is pretty steady. He's had a lot of life experiences, and he's definitely calmed down a lot from his younger days. If I'd met him when he was younger, we probably wouldn't have gotten on so well.

We're different enough in age that he grew up in a different era than I did, and so I learn a lot about that time, which I think is cool. We have different life experiences and perspectives on things. Its fun to talk about, and to hear about. We tease each other a lot about age differences, and its just something that is fun to do.

I don't know if my being younger is always appealing to him, sometimes he gets frustrated at some of the things I do, and calls up his mom, who reminds him that I'm 10 years younger, and am going to see some things differently, etc. Not to mention being female.

I think he DOES enjoy the fact that he can "get" a younger woman, on some level, really. I mean, I think that's pretty normal, to an extent. Provided you actually like the chick, I'd think that having her be somewhat younger and hot would just be a bonus, really. He's also dated plenty of women his age, so I don't think it was the primary factor, but I think he likes the fact that given our age difference, I am always going to look younger than him, enough that people will notice...

Then again, I don't know how much our good relationship is just our personalities clicking, rather than the age difference. I've dated mostly men my own age, my husband is the only guy who really has been significantly older. I've definitely found it more pleasant than with a younger guy, but it may just be the fact that my husband really suits me down to the ground, personality wise. That's always possible.

I have found, however, that I really don't mind my husband's age difference in the slightest, and there are lots of things I like about it.

Anna

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Posted (edited)

reproduction. at the heart of it, that's what it's all about. Older men tend to go for younger women because they give off signs of fertility. tight skin, glossy skin, thick/abundant hair and/or glossy hair, clear whites of the eyes, full/plump breasts and buttock/hip areas, tight skin and tight muscles. all signs of fertility. Older women, in contrast, everything about a woman 40+ pretty much indicates she is past childbearing years. Note I am not talking about emotional maturity, education, or financial security, I'm purely talking about the physical here. Women in their childbearing years give off certain physical signs that men of all ages respond too.

look at some older women many guys think are hot. They appear to be much younger.

edited to add: so even if a man does not want kids or is not consciously thinking about kids, he is going to be attracted to the person/people in whom it looks like his seed will take root and flower best. This is a primal level of attraction between the sexes.

Edited by earthgarden

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Posted

I agree with earthgarden, but older men also like younger woman because they have no history with that young lady. She hasn't been with him through the years, watching while he got drunk at office parties, screwed up various relationships, fell out of the tree while building a tree house, shot the gun when he swore it wasn't loaded, etc etc. A woman of 45 or 50 or 60 who has been in a long-term relationship knows that guy inside and out, and sometimes he doesn't think that's such a good thing.

The younger woman sees him as a successful, distinguished man with a few gray hairs and lots of maturity. She's all wide-eyed, and doesn't know what it took to get him to this point. She laughs at all his jokes because she hasn't heard them a thousand times. He's relaxed and confident because he's not a 25 or 30-year-old guy, clawing his way to the top. He can also offer her financial security. (Well, Baboo and I had $600 total when we got married, but we were different).

Just sayin'....

olga (married to a guy 17 years her senior)

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Posted

The shoe on the other foot.going way back,

I always preferred older women,20-25 years older,

now I find the same age group still does it for me.

The young girls,nice to watch.

No substance,mostly,wot she gonna do,text,during sex?

I'm still a nose perv,The classic American button nose,

no,not interesting,It's difficult to explain,I'm not going to try.

Stasis

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Posted (edited)

I don't really consider 10 yrs all that much. I find that to be rather common. Women tend to mature earlier than men so women often marry a man 10 yrs older b/c he is more likely ready to settle down and all that- everyone knows this. Once you get past 10 yrs I think you are getting a bit of difference in your ages. I feel that over a decade is a lot. That being said the I see a lot of women married to men 15-25 yrs or more than them. The only problem I can see is you will grow older at different times. Other than that I always had a thing for older men myself.

Now when women marry men that much younger than themself they are the subject of rude comments. They are called cougars. what are men called--Lucky.

Edited by Stars

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Posted

I think the other question here is why do younger girls date older men?

I know the in my past I have only dated older men, at leat 5 years older than me, my so now is 10 years older, I dont think I ever really dated some one my age. (I never really thought about that till now)

I dated a guy when I turned 18 who was 30, he partied way too much ended up crashing his eagle talon at 60 mph in to a wall divider at the entrance of a tunnel.

Men like younger women, it makes them feel young (I am talking about the single not serious guys not any of your SO's) they like eye candy as well, the girl is their trophy, in their head they're thinking, I may be going through a mid life crisis but look at the girls I can still get ;)

I think partially it has to do with the fact that a girl's brain matures quicker than a guy's, so it's normal to seek someone with the same brain maturization as you.

When I was 18 I dated a 37 year old, my ex was 42 (I was 22) and now I'm in my normal age range (I'm 23, bf is 25). The 42 year old and I got along great and had a perfect relationship for a good bit (well considering). Even talked marriage and babies for a while. But unfortunately he caught me during a manic streak which sort of helped out with my not caring he had a wife and playing into his mind games for fun. They got old quick and she caught us. So needless to say, that's a bridge well burnt.

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Posted

My husband is 8 1/2 years older that me. It's not too bad now that we are 44 and 36, but it was a little tricky when we first dated... I was 26 and he was 25. I managed to lie about his age (told the parents he was 20) for a month or so until my father found out and blew a gasket. Mom about fainted, for sure I was having wild sex at the house he owned alone at every opportunity. The only reason I was able to continue to date him was that my father dated his sisted a couple of times in high school, and his parents knew both my parents and grandparents. Gotta love a small town. Though my dad did stalk us on more than one date for awhile, lol.

My husband is the first and only person I ever dated. My wild oats were never sown, so to speak.

Never in a million years will I let my daughter date a 25 year old when she is 16.

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Posted

as a "younger woman" (28 as of tomorrow), i've often wondered why older men (40+) date me and not women their own age. be honest now! are you just getting another motorcycle, what is the allure?

My third blog (not yet written) is going to address this very issue I'm having as I near 40 (I'm 39.) It's a VERY important issue to me, and at the moment I'm having major problems with it- I see 40 as a switch that's labeled "End of Quality Life"... or "Game Over, You Lost".

Here's my reasoning that I'm only attracted to younger women:

1) I didn't get to date or have hardly any major relationships up to this point. If you've read my other blog entries, you'd know why, but the short is- I have had a total of ONE relationship lasting 2 years from 18-20, and ONE other relationship lasting 6 months- 5 3/4 of which was by phone only. What does this mean? This means I've had sex about twenty times. I've never "dated". I have never, and would never, do a one night stand. I have the sexual experience of a gnat. To me, the missionary position is an UNHEARD OF crazy, whacky and wild thing two people could do. How does this impact age? Obviously, the younger the woman, the less experience she's prone to be (obviously not always), but more importantly, older women tend to be divorced or have had one or more long term relationships with tons of sex. I would bore them to death in five minutes with my high-school level approach to sex. I have no interest in games, or toys, or roleplaying- because I've never experienced what I was supposed to (basic, simple sex) at the appropriate ages- teens, 20's, 30's. Also- I'm not a "big" guy, uh, down there. There are NO safe ways to increase size. Everything is a scam, or dangerous. You're stuck with what you're born with, period. An older woman is likely to be put off and/or scoff at a small sized man, whereas younger women are less experienced (again, more often than not) and don't have the tendency to judge you against their ex-husband, for instance. They're more likely to think "wow, that's huge!" even when you're at the opposite end. By the time they realize that's false, they'll already know size doesn't matter.

2) I WANT kids. My own. Not adopted. Not step. I *must* pass my DNA on or I will have failed at life, since I'm not going to do anything else of consequence- and thus, when I die, if I'm childless, it will be as if I never existed within five minutes of being buried. If I pass on my DNA, my children or future generations down my line may do something of worth. That is vitally important to me. I don't want to have been a waste of space. Of course, we all know 40 is already cutting it close for women to have kids. The odds of birth defects in ALL 40 year olds is greatly increased, and while I want kids desperately, obviously if they suffer from a birth defect the odds of them continuing on the genetic line is nil, thus again I'm back to having never existed. Also, the relationship math is strained at that point. If I meet someone, and get into a relationship- that's going to be a year or so of being together minimum to make sure we're great. Then, if I moved WAY faster than I normally would, I'd move in together to see that we're compatible to live together (I leave the TV on, sleep with a fan on me and snore horribly from sleep apnea- how's that going to fly?) Once I find a woman (by a miracle) able to put up with my living quirks and we've spent at least 6 months together, we'd get engaged. That would last 6 months- 1 year (rushing, again) to plan the wedding. Then you get married. Of course, you want to spend newlywed time unhindered, so you spend time together- another year or two. That means if I found a 40 year old to start, we'd be 44 or 45 when ready to have kids. That's REALLY old to have kids. Many women would be past the point to have them easily. It may suddenly turn out I'm now married to someone who can't have kids, and now I'm stuck knowing my life will be a failure as I mentioned above (adopted kids are NOT your DNA- so no matter what, it is not YOU passing on down the generations. And yes, I *am* important enough compared to so many who've had kids who shouldn't have in this world that my DNA should be passed on.)

3) I have nothing to offer women my age interests wise. I'm a gamer. I spend my free time- almost all of it- playing computer and console games. I do not travel due to my anxiety disorder. I don't garden or do yardwork- it's a waste of time and boring. I have far more in common with a woman who's about 24-28 who is a gamer herself and loves the idea of spending a Saturday fragging people in a first person shooter. (For the record, the average gamer age is 37 and increasing rapidly every year, and more and more women are joining in, so this issue may change- but it's still true at the moment.) The other thing for me on this is former relationships. Again, a younger woman is less likely to be a divorcee- the last thing I need in life is to be gunned down by an angry ex-husband. No thanks. I need to find someone who has never been seriously attached- but not because they have serious problems... just because they've had no chance like me (due to work, for instance.)

4) Lastly- looks, weight and age. I am turned off by overweight women, and we all gain weight as we age. I refuse to date right now because I need to lose weight, and won't put that double standard out there. But I need to find a woman who is not used up, who is still thin, fit and somewhat innocent. I never got to have that sex in the three decades you SHOULD be having sex in (at least, enough sex or of any quality), with bodies that are not wrinkled, saggy and gross. I have as much a right as anyone to the young, fit sex that pretty much everyone else got to have. Also, there's an age cutoff for me. Others don't share this view, but it is my standard- I don't believe in sex with a woman over 55. Nothing repulses me more than the thought of elder sex. ACK. So, dating someone who's 40 gives you 15 years of sex, whereas someone under 30 gives you another full decade plus. Again, I know that view is not shared, nor popular, but I have a right to that view. (Hey, some people have no problem with overweight sex. To each their own.)

These are my tangible, concrete reasons. They're also why (with my anxiety disorder and career woes) I'm going to pass 40 and be invisible to 20-somethings, and will have nothing to live for at that point. It's quite unfortunate.

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Posted

But I need to find a woman who is not used up,

What, like not all loosened up from bigger dicks?

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