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I can't connect with people

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Posted · Report post

Hi,

I'm not talking with people very closely. Actually it takes time for me to friendly with people. I don't have anything to talk with them sometimes. But I think it's necessary to build up a conversation otherwise you will be lonely. But I find it's very difficult.

sometimes I'm scared that others will talk against me and they will shout at me.

Also I feel shy to go forward. And when I go for an interview I can't talk really well, I do have a shaky voice & sweaty palms as well. I can't talk well at meetings. I'm shivering. I always think if I made a mistake, what the other person will think about me?? Will they laugh at me?? So this limits my social activities as well.

Is this some kind of a problem. I don't understand. I really want to come out of this. But how?

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Posted · Report post

Have you tried working with a therapist? That might be a safe place to start. And you would need to talk there. You can overcome this. You just need some help. If you can't make progress on this shyness, or social phobia, then you might want an evaluation by a psychiatrist. You could also become a member here. Get to know people a little.

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Posted · Report post

Hi Ishani. You are welcome to join CB and talk to people here. Sometimes virtual is easier than IRL. You'd also get a chance to talk to other with the same or similar challenges and hear about what they are doing to get around it.

Ladybug is right. Therapy is the main treatment, the thing that helps most people get beyond the anxieties and fears. Some people need medicine, too, which is why they'd see a psychiatrist.

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Posted · Report post

ladybug & Stacia,

Thank you very much. I would like to become a member so I can get to know about people and I can make friends too. I should go to a psychiatrist as u said. Also could you pls recomend good books for me to read?

I would like to become a member of this. May I know the procedure pls.

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Posted · Report post

Hello Mckey,

Thank you very much for your advice.

You said, people here can help immensely with support and information. Before that do I need to become a member of this? I do really want to come out of this. I like to talk to people as normal. It will makes me feel good. Thank you very much again.

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Posted · Report post

Hi,

I'm not talking with people very closely. Actually it takes time for me to friendly with people. I don't have anything to talk with them sometimes. But I think it's necessary to build up a conversation otherwise you will be lonely. But I find it's very difficult.

sometimes I'm scared that others will talk against me and they will shout at me.

Also I feel shy to go forward. And when I go for an interview I can't talk really well, I do have a shaky voice & sweaty palms as well. I can't talk well at meetings. I'm shivering. I always think if I made a mistake, what the other person will think about me?? Will they laugh at me?? So this limits my social activities as well.

Is this some kind of a problem. I don't understand. I really want to come out of this. But how?

Im just like you, rack my brains for something, ANYTHING to strike up a convosation about, but there's just a blank abyss in your head and in the end you cant even be bothered to think about socalizing. Im constantly scared about, insults, whispering, backstabbing. incredibly paranoid basicaly. And you can feel your voice shaking, and trembling. Comes out in asoft quiet tone. Sometimes my body shakes to, especially my legs, and i cant psycially stop it. Am i hitting the mark here? Because you aint alone, and even though the current state your in, help from a stranger (therapist) seems obsolete, and just pointless. but it does work.... to an extent, it depends on the type of person you are, but its definately worth trying. I can hugely relate to you mate. you on any meds?

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Posted · Report post

Hi Halluci_Nationwide,

Yeah u r jst like me n I'm just like u.. I'm not taking any medicine. Are you?

I read some books related to this problem. So after reading it, I got some kind of an energy, then I could talk with people than before, i could talk well at meatings well. But after few days again I came to the normal state.

One of my friends said, if you want to change ur self you have to think n do it, no one else can change you if you don't want..

But I want to change. So when I go somewhere I tell my self, "don't worry, try to talk with others" , try to connect with others". I know it's difficult. I did it several times. Then I felt good. But you are just forcing you by doing that... But seriously I felt good.

Do u still have this problem? I still hav this :(

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Posted · Report post

I'm not taking any medicine.

[...]

I still hav this :(

You answer your own question.

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Posted · Report post

Mudpuppy,,

There are no medicine for these.... >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

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Posted (edited) · Report post

Hi Halluci_Nationwide,

Yeah u r jst like me n I'm just like u.. I'm not taking any medicine. Are you?

I read some books related to this problem. So after reading it, I got some kind of an energy, then I could talk with people than before, i could talk well at meatings well. But after few days again I came to the normal state.

One of my friends said, if you want to change ur self you have to think n do it, no one else can change you if you don't want..

But I want to change. So when I go somewhere I tell my self, "don't worry, try to talk with others" , try to connect with others". I know it's difficult. I did it several times. Then I felt good. But you are just forcing you by doing that... But seriously I felt good.

Do u still have this problem? I still hav this :(

Yeah man I have that problem, and i dont have the answers your looking for im afraid because im in the same situation as you. I know what you mean by feeling forced. its like, when you try and talk to someone,it takeas all your enery and effort, and its just not natural. I think that adds to the negativity cos its always in the backof your mind. like, this is fake. Do you agree? But its true what your friend said, only you can help yourself, I personally havnt mastered that myself yet either, but we'll get there! One last thing, I definately think you should look into medication, because even though until youve found the right meds theyreonly half the battle, they do significantly help. Read my signature, shows the meds im on.

Edited by Halluci_Nationwide

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Posted · Report post

Mudpuppy,,

There are no medicine for these.... >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

That's where you're mistaken.

There are plenty of medications to treat anxiety, which can be the first step to overcoming your problems.

You cannot know, until you try, how much of your problem stems from anxiety or other issues like depression, paranoia, etc.

Medications serve to facilitate therapy for anxiety.

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