39 posts in this topic
Psychosis & Dreaming
I'm starting this topic because I'm curious about the connection between psychosis/hearing voices and dreams, specifically lucid dreams.
Now I don't have lucid dreams very often but when I do I'm always interacting with my voices (who, if I believed my previous delusions, are telepathic communications of people I know IRL) in their physical form in a virtual, dream-like plane. My voices would have me believe that everyone lucid dreams all the time (except for me) and it's a way of interacting with other voices telepathically albeit with physical manifestations of each other. It can often be a way of two people having intimate, sexual experiences with each other without being in the same physical location of one another.
I once had one dream which revealed what would then go on to be a deeper delusion where all my voices were in fact talking to each other via a text-based instant-messaging-like program (eg. IRC).
Has anyone else experienced anything similar to this? ie. where some dreams involve interacting with their voices in a more "up close & personal" way?
EDIT: I forgot I posted about this already nearly a year ago Seeing the voices as an IRC style chat program so apologies for the repost
...Aging out of therapy, tired and afraid to sleep
By Talky Tina
It's 11 and I woke up at 2 or 3. I don't remember. I went to bed around midnight. I have a disappointed cat and a cold apartment. An appointment with one therapist tomorrow and another on Thursday.
Tomorrow is going to be with a therapist that has a focus on youth. I'm 29 so I'm only 'several months away from our last meeting. She's been with me for over 6 years. Oversaw my homelessness, my transition, my going into and out of hospitals. I want to keep seeing her weekly for years to come but I guess it's only reasonable. And the right time. If it wasn't I'd know. I just kind of.. I'unno.
Her and I talk about nightmares a lot. They really fucking suck. I don't know if it's because I forgot to take my med last night but I had a lot of them. Walked in on a play my friends were putting on. Accidentally wandered on stage and I didn't have a part in it. So I ran off stage and into a field that kept changing. I got a call from a friend and I couldn't describe what I was seeing. I realized that no one could understand and I was going crazy.
I then "woke up" in a dark room and someone was pounding on a door it was a rapist and I was in trouble. Lately I've been having those pop up in my dreams a lot. I won't share anymore. But I woke up for real and saw mealworms covering my body. And then the dream imagery stuff kind of faded away.
So. that's cool. Usually I write a bit of what I dream to my therapist when it's awful. It must not be weird to have a connection with a therapist you've been seeing. I mean.. C'mon it's their job. But. Still. I'm an adult and in a way I feel like I'm going to be stepping out into the big wide world alone. In some ways I've been alone for most of my life. It's just.. in some ways it feels more so now that we're dissolving the relationship. Her practice is growing in leaps and bounds. She's going on a sabbatical and I... the great 29 year old kid is going to be looking for new caregivers. I guess. In a couple of months.
Then why does it feel like it's already happened? Then why am I still scared to go to sleep like a child? Then why am I 29 years old still unable to go grocery shopping, step out of her apartment, still unable to shop for clothes and haven't done laundry in months? then why am I? I don't know... Why do I feel like I've already missed out on most of life? Unable to bring myself to play with my cat and spend a substantial amount of my time crying alone?
I guess I don't know. fuck life. right?
Hydroxyzine Instead Of Remeron?
By original guy
Would another antihistamine such as Hydroxyzine be something worth trying instead of Remeron for sleep, appetite, and anxiety? I ask this because every time I have been on remeron it has been amazing the first few weeks. I sleep great, wake up refreshed, and eat well and put on much needed weight, which I'm guessing from it's powerful antihistamine effect. But each time after about a month while I continue to sleep and eat better my anxiety actually gets worse, and I get agitated and edgy a lot, which I'm guessing is from the norepinephrine part kicking in? Would a drug like Hydroxyzine or something similar maybe still give me that feeling like I have the first few weeks on remeron without the negative stuff several weeks later? I just with remeron would keep working forever like it always does those first few weeks.
I have been known to fall asleep while trying to study , failed every test and have been told that I wasn't going to graduate on time with my classmates\
A friend of mine introduced me to this supplement called Nootropics (Adrafinil) it is known to stimulate your mind and increase the feeling of wakefulness and helps increase overall motivation possibly due to the positive effect.
I started taking these supplements and it has helped a lot in my school work and studies and i was able to pass all my exams, and able to graduate on time with my fellow classmates.
Bad memory and unable to tell if dream or reality?
So this is my first post here as I just sort of need to feel as though I'm not the only one... So I haven't always had a bad memory but it has started to worsen in the last few years from a-level onwards. It never worried me, I suppose it was a slow progress and there were just some 'off-days' where I couldn't remember things but it was always a joke. But its gotten worse, I forget my boyfriends name (we've been going out for 2years now), I forget what my brother looks like, conversations that apparently happened a week ago I have no recollection of. And now, and the main reason Im posting, is because I can tell if something happened or if it was just a dream - and I don't mean from childhood, I understand about fake memories. But these are different I wake up and I'm so unsure as to what happened the previous day and whether I have actually dreamt it, and after asking my friends /family/boyfriend it would seem as though most of my memories that I have from the previous day are incorrect... I hate it, I try to focus on my memories to decipher what's going on but everything is so fuzzy, its like I'm trying to watch tv without my glasses, and it always leaves me with a massive headache... I've also been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and its worsening my symptoms, all I want to do is curl up in bed and ignore the world. Anyway sorry for the long post just needed to explain myself... I'm just so confused and I've tried looking into it but nothing relates, it makes me feel so alone. Anyway just let me know your experiences and thoughts.