28 posts in this topic
[TW: Brief/abstract mention of abuse/abusers] So, we've been getting a mix of outright-nightmares and intensely-vivid-dreams that are still on the "that was uncomfortable/disconcerting/constant-anxiety" spectrum, to the point of being often afraid to go to bed as a result. Abusers appear commonly, but far from "always", and PTSD nightmares were a thing we used to get that mostly faded.. A lot of these aren't related to them in any way I can see. Usually we get at least 2 'bad dreams' a night, sometimes more, often due to the "wake up a little early/on time, fall back asleep" thing, but often not; More recently dreams have been starting to chain together into ones where you 'wake up', which then go Unpleasantly as well.
We have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome III, which I know causes raised adrenaline, night-time adrenal spikes, and thus vivid dreams & poor sleep. But still. This is a whole new level of it.
Anyway. This makes us feel never-actually-rested and really dreading sleep every night and.. Yeah. Any tips? We've been in a mental health breakdown for the past few months (due to, but not exclusively, homelessness crisis/new abuse, housed but not out of the woods on practical stressors there by a long way), but since this is actively helping prolong & make the breakdown worse, any advice'd be much appreciated.
My meds are listed below. Recently, maybe the last few months I seem to be covered with bruises. I dont know where they come from. (well some I do, I am a klutz which I blame on seroquel ) Some dont hurt at all and others are painful.
It's getting sorta ridiculous. I see my Pdoc on Wednesday and will bring it to his attention. Maybe some blood work is in order.
Has anybody experienced the same? Was it med induced or other health issue induced?
A few days ago, my husband left and called my family to come get me. I was sick out of work for a week. Husband stayed home with me that last day and then disapeared while I was napping. The next thing I knew was that my family gathered me up, brought me to another city where they live, told me to quit my job, and give notice on my rental house. I'm giving away almost all my possessions as I don't know when I will be able to live on my own again. I now have no job, no husband, no money, and no freedom. I am giving my mom power of attorney since I can't manage anything right now. I hate bipolar. So weary of being sick. My family is planning on me going on permanent disability, because I seem to be getting more unstable as I age. I feel beyond bad. My young adult son is more of an adult than I am. I know I am venting. Does anyone have any hope to offer? Right now, I'm feeling pretty out of hope.
Bumped into a woman who was my friend She was on her way to a bipolar support group. I previously decided to end the friendship. Reason was she would be really thoughtful and then sometime later she'd turn on me. This would be anywhere from a couple months to a few weeks. This was her pattern with everyone who was ever her friend so it wasn't that she targeted me out. I don't mean to imply everyone with bipolar is like her.
When she turned she was really mean spirited. She said things that were downright cruel. It was as if she looked for what someone was most sensitive to and used that to really hurt that person. That includes yours truly.
So no idea why I did this. I said hello to her. I called her name.
She told me she was on a regimen of meds that finally stabilized her. Mentioned . First for her sake and everyone else's she is stable. Realize my query may be unanswerable. Did I give enough information?
I have been relatively stable for about 3 months. I do run high but not too high. I dont think I run high.
I suddenly have the most amazing vision. I can see everything in amazing detail. Even the leaves on the trees. I can watch them swaying and they just seem so alive. Everything is vivid. Everything is ultra focused and made of a millions tiny pieces of color. I dont have the best eyesight so it's really nice to see like this.
Is this a precursor of an episode of some sort? Never experienced this before. During a depressive episode I will experience absolutely horrid smells, never anything to do with my sight.
I would like to ignore this but sorta am worried. Just looking to see if anyone else experiences this and if so was it part of a mood episode or just a one off weirdo thing?