9 posts in this topic
So as the title says, I am trying to start a depression support group at the community college I attend. I live in a very rural area and the closest place that would have anything like this is 25-30 miles away. The only problem I have is that I have never done anything like this and I need help. I would like to hear your experiences if you've ever attended a support group, good and bad. I would like for my group to be around 50% educational and 50% venting. Any suggestions or maybe a recommendation on what i can talk about would be highly appreciated.
Hi guys, so I am currently still in the process of finding my correct dosage of Adderall, but I had a question for those who have had more experience with the drug. How do you feel when your dosage is too high? Since we're still adjusting I want to know what to look for in myself to tell if I need to scale it back or if it feels right. I've heard some people say they feel like robots if the meds are too high, but I'm not sure if there is anything else really obvious that I should look for. I'm guessing too much of a euphoric feeling? Like maybe how people feel when they get high on Adderall? Maybe high heart rate?
Anyways just trying to be safe with this drug. I really don't want to abuse it or take too much if I don't need it. I know everyone is different, but just thought I'd ask for some opinions.
Also, I've heard some people say you build up a tolerance and some people say you don't... any thoughts on this?
Thank you in advance!!!
I have bipolar, severe anxiety and depression. My Dr has tried me on several drugs. Some have helped to a degree but I'm still having suicidal thoughts and crying every day along with major anxiety. My Dr wants me to try ECT but I'm terrified of the side effects. Any input would be appreciated. Thank you.
I've had two previous major psychotic episodes while off my medication for long periods. These episodes put me into a manic frenzy that caused legal problems. Once where I isolated and resisted arrest on foot and the other where I resisted / eluded by motor vehicle across 3 counties. One occurred during a heat wave in mid-July and the next during frigid temperatures in mid-January, thus extreme temperatures are one of my triggers.
Thankfully there was little damage and no one was hurt either time.
My lifestyle pattern involves me taking anti-psychotic medication by court order (usually by injection) for 1 to 2 years for probation before going off and feeling consistently better from the lack of adverse side effects (akathisia, drowsiness, suicide ideation, anxiety, panic attacks, anhedonia, hopelessness, severe weight gain, etc).
I do well for about 7 to 8 months but then begin to isolate in my apartment and decompensate and become delusional and manic, thinking I possess special abilities and evolutionary traits and can communicate with a higher power. There is some paranoia involved as well. Sometimes I hallucinate. Then I relapse and become frenetic.
There is however, little to no depression when I'm off the anti-psychotics. When I take them I'm severely depressed.
I have seen a number of psychiatrists since I developed this illness in 2011 at age 22 and been labeled Paranoid Schizophrenic, Schizoaffective, and Bipolar 1 With Mania. None of them are completely synonymous and my current psych can't make up his mind.
I'm very sensitive to anti-psychotics. Only 1.25mg of Zyprexa zapped my delusional thinking and hallucinations in a few hours and Invega Sustenna 39mg (what I'm currently taking) is more than enough for treating my symptoms as well. The same thing with 2mg of Abilify. I'm just saying this because I've heard that some individuals need moderate to higher dosages for the medications to be effective. I'm not one of them.
Anyway, I came across one psychiatrist who was part of the justice system (in the beginning of my term) who refused to place me on an anti-psychotic claiming I was too focused during my occurrences with the police for him to diagnose me Schizoaffective. He said that I still retained some sanity based on what he was told and wasn't trying to murder anyone or hurt myself.
He refuted Schizoaffective Disorder and labeled me Bipolar 1 With Mania And Temporary Psychosis and said I had one of the most extreme cases of Mania he had ever seen. He recommended a heavy mood-stabilizer instead of an anti-psychotic. He said there may be some delusional thinking but I will remain baseline and wont act upon them. Unfortunately, I was extradited within a few weeks and placed out of his care and the next psych I came across was an AP dispenser and convinced me to take it so probation would accept me.
The only mood-stabilizer I've tried is Nuerontin or Gabapentin and I wasn't on it long enough to know if it treated my symptoms effectively.
I come off probation in December and don't want to get in trouble with the law once again, but at the same time I despise what these anti-psychotics are currently doing to me. Some things I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy. Being on the anti-psychotic leads to depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, akathisia, hating every aspect of life, and weight gain and coming off completely means thinking I have 38 girlfriends and can stop missiles in their tracks. Could a mood-stabilizer be the appropriate balance to end this nightmare? Can someone have Bipolar Mania so severe they develop Psychosis but not actually be Schizoaffective?
For me lately, it fits somewhere between going to the doctor, an Obgyn appointment, and having to get a filling at the dentist. Never enjoyable, usually boring or painful. I’ve seen the same therapist 6 months and every time I leave her office, I feel worse. My mood drops and it triggers my negative rumination again. Even if the rest of my day was OK. Is this common?
I like her as a person, she is nice/empathic, comments a little bit. Yet, the sessions are exactly the same every week:
I sit down, (PAUSE/silence), she then looks at me and says “well?” and then comes my redundant monologue about the events that week, how I feel (the same/depressed). We don’t practice any behaviors, or troubleshoot, she doesn’t give me new insight to myself and I haven’t made progress. I told her that I feel stuck & I’d like a bit of “homework” to do/more interactive problem-solving..but she says she doesn’t really do that.
I know, I should find a new therapist….problem is, I can’t. I live in a foreign country and very very few people speak English. I’ve had trial sessions with like 3 of the only English-speaking therapists around and I really didn’t connect. Maybe I should just phase her out and go at it alone? Tired of paying $$$ out of pocket just to simply talk about my week. I might as well start a blog or just journal. It’s not productive.