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faceless

I just want it to stop...

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Hi everyone..

 

I'm not exactly sure how this works (this is my first time) but I guess I'll give it a shot. I've suffered from anxiety for as long as I can remember. I have a very low self esteem, insecurities etc.. I'm in college and I live with both of my parents and my brother. I don't like letting them see me because I feel like they will think I'm ugly and I start feeling pressure and tightness in my throat and chest when I have to be around people. I have anxiety attacks constantly throughout the day. I worry about every little thing in particular (school, the past, the future, and sometimes I worry about nothing at all) I feel the whole pressure and tightness in my throat right now writing this because I want it to sound right. I'll often get in a bad mood when I don't want to be around my family so they'll leave me alone because I worry too much about what they're thinking. Sometimes I will miss school because I fear something bad will happen that day and I don't want to be around people. (I guess I have some form of social anxiety) Sometimes it will get so bad I'll think about ending my life just so I won't have to go somewhere or do something. I want to be a doctor but I know my anxiety and insecurities are going to keep me from achieving that goal. I don't know what to do anymore. I just want it to stop and be normal. I don't want to worry about every little thing I'm doing or everything having to be perfect. My last psychiatrist tried several, and I mean several, antidepressants and none of them worked. They just made me tired, so I stopped going. I want to go to a new doctor but I don't want to go through taking more antidepressants. I want something that helps for once. What do I do?  

Edited by faceless

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Have you considered psychotherapy in addition to pharmacotherapy?

 

Cognitive behavioral therapy can be very effective in addressing anxieties.

 

The "third wave" cognitive behavioral therapies (dialectical behavioral therapy, acceptance and commitment therapy, and mindfulness based stress reduction) have tremendous potential to help you have the quality of life you desire and deserve in spite of the concerns you now have.

 

I encourage you to check them out. Find a tdoc who has specifically trained with a reputable certifying organization.

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I would also like to second DBT. It has helped me so much. Also, there are non antidepressant meds out there that work well for anxiety. I would suggest finding a new psychiatrist and asking about so e alternative meds.

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In addition to what Woo said, you could try different classes of medications. For example, I take Abilify which is an anti-psychotic and it does WONDERS for my anxiety. I have GAD... Well, not really any more thanks to Abilify. 

 

So, there are other types of drugs you can try to rein in your anxiety. 

 

I really suggest cognitive behavioural therapy together with medication. I did CBT for anxiety and it was extremely helpful. CBT teaches you to identify distorted thoughts and to respond to them. It's very effective for anxiety. 

 

As well, you could consider picking up some work books for dealing with anxiety. They are usually found in the self-help section of the bookstore, or you could go through the amazon link here on CB. I have used books to deal with my bipolar and psychosis and they are helpful because they validate what I'm feeling. 

 

I'm so sorry you're suffering like this. Hold onto that dream of being a doctor!! I thought I would never achieve my dreams of becoming a nurse, but here I am in nursing school. It's harder for us to achieve our dreams because we have formidable challenges. However, as long as you take care of yourself, I believe you can have a meaningful life with mental illness.

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There are still a ton of meds you could try.  AAPS, benzos, and buspar to mention some.  Also CBT and ACT therapy have helped my anxiety a lot.  Goggle them and you will get a ton of info on finding a therpist or self help resources.  There are workbooks for anxiety in the CrazyStore on this site.  The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook has a ton of different techniques, and is well worth checking out.  Good luck, and keep posting here, there are a ton of us who have anxiety or have overcome it and it is a great support system here.

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Thank you so much for the replies, everyone. I haven't tried behavior therapies yet. I didn't know if it actually worked or not, but I will check that out now. It really helps knowing i'm not alone in all of this. I wish you all the best.  

 

 

Parapluie, congratulations on nursing school! 

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Hey girl, don't you worry, you're with similar people as you.  But writing about your problems won't solve them at all ... I found that with myself, always writing but never assimilating what was being said to me.  I like reading through site like http://lonerwolf.com because they help me sort out what I'm feeling, and help me to make real change.  You might like to read a really helpful article as a place to start http://lonerwolf.com/6-mental-traps/

I hope it helps you out! xx

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CronnEZ, we are a community here of Mentally Interesting people, and we encourage our members to seek professional help.  That means seeing a psychiatrist, working with a therapist, and giving medications a fair chance to work. 

 

There is nothing wrong with the article you linked to in your post---it identifies some of the negative thinking that is common with MI people.  However, it doesn't suggest any way to cope with those thoughts.  Is that website anti-therapy? 

 

Please develop a relationship with our community HERE at Crazyboards before suggesting that our members go elsewhere for support.

 

olga

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Hey girl, don't you worry, you're with similar people as you.  But writing about your problems won't solve them at all ...

In fact, writing about one's problems is a recognized, widely recommended, effective, and time-tested form of therapy.  The act of writing forces a person to parse emotional reactions through the relatively ordered and rational context of narrative construction in order to communicate them on paper, which helps the individual to make sense of them and understand them in a more objective way.  This often leads to viewing one's feelings from the point of view of an outside reader/observer.  We only reach solutions to our problems when we embrace new ideas and concepts on which we can act, or new perceptions of ourselves that we can embrace; often, those must come from within, and we must create them ourselves from our own inner resources.  Writing is one of the best tools to access those resources.  To suggest that writing about problems won't solve them is unhelpful and uninformed.

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I get the "tightness in my throat and chest when I have to be around people. I have anxiety attacks constantly throughout the day. I worry about every little thing in particular (school, the past, the future, and sometimes I worry about nothing at all) I feel the whole pressure and tightness in my throat right now writing this because I want it to sound right."

 

Sounds pretty much like me.  I can relate.

 

As mentioned above, DBT can be really helpful.  I've learned a lot.  I wish I would have done this a long time ago (I'm in DBT right now).  It is a big commitment though, but you should check it out at least to become familiar with the concepts.  There's lots of options besides pharms - you just got to find the one (or more) that is right for you.

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I write about my issues a lot and it really does help.

CBT is effective with anxiety.

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I don't like being dependent on medications, but eventually I just said fuck it, and accepted the fact I need them the same way a diabetic needs insulin. 

 

  We live in a society where we are constantly bombarded with fears.  And those fears lead to depressions. So if taking some pill gets me through the day, then whatever.  I'm glad it's there.

Edited by Derek

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