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Can ya'll see a difference?

7 posts in this topic

Posted · Report post

So without my doc knowing and getting more klonopin because he wouldn't wean me off of it and so I decided that I was going to take my ritalin again....I have been taking it and my mood is lifted....I will take .125 of klonopin if I'm feeling any withdrawals....But, I have gabapentin that mainly covers most of my benzo hassle. Okay I feel like I'm just not sitting around doing nothing....IDK if depression is a symptom of ADHD or ADD...But, my depression has left.....I want a job but, feel as tho if I had one that would screw up my disibilty and I would have the trouble of doing it all over again.....I mainly stay on the computer giving ppl helpful advice instead of laying in bed wishing I could do that and say in my head. Ok! I'll help someone, na! I'm too depressed to do that......Staying in bed all day sux and Now I stay up all day either talking to my stepdad or just chillin with you guys...

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Posted · Report post

Don't play doctor. You're not one. Go see your pdoc, fess up and do as s/he says.

As for working, if you are capable then you should work. Otherwise you are taking advantage of the system.

Sorry to be harsh but as you can see I feel pretty strongly on these issues.

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Posted · Report post

The reason I don't work is legit. If I loose my doc which I would if I worked because it cost 145 dollars just to see him once..Then I have to take in account that if I have another psychotic break then I would lose my job and have to have a crappy doctor just go thru all the pain again, not give me the right meds and prolly won't be eligabl for SSI anymore.....So I lose my mind. My current doctor and my job....I am not able to work because somedays I just feel as tho the world is ending. Those are my OCD spikes...I'm not the one that put me on SSI. The social worker and my psych doctor at the time and therapist all agreed that I was stuck and I was suffering. Granted I have gotten better but thats so much I can lose........

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Posted (edited) · Report post

And you can tell by my posts the pattern of which I do have a sickness. Lets not forget the facts....Why would I just non sense post about somebody who thinks satan is talking to him to bad withdrawals to depression major that is and just too many things for me to right down....I don't car if you think I'm using the system...I know I have issue's and what I ment is I want to be productive like I was before I got sick and get a job....It wasn't about using the system so I bent a few choice words that didn't come out right.....Sorry I'm not mad .....I just don't like being called a liar...if that makes any sense......Other then that it oh well. Slowly but, surely I am getting back on my feet and God knows that in time I may be able to work and all this was breathing space for me while I was and am sick.

 

 

 

I'm not mad I promise....It didn't come out right so please don't be offended......

Edited by sonicwhite

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Posted · Report post

The reason I don't work is legit. If I loose my doc which I would if I worked because it cost 145 dollars just to see him once..Then I have to take in account that if I have another psychotic break then I would lose my job and have to have a crappy doctor just go thru all the pain again, not give me the right meds and prolly won't be eligabl for SSI anymore.....So I lose my mind. My current doctor and my job....I am not able to work because somedays I just feel as tho the world is ending. Those are my OCD spikes...I'm not the one that put me on SSI. The social worker and my psych doctor at the time and therapist all agreed that I was stuck and I was suffering. Granted I have gotten better but thats so much I can lose........

 

I am sometimes torn between trying to work again or not.  My husband doesn't think I'm ready.  I get stressed out easily and it triggers symptoms.  But, I do go through the logistics, too, of if it would even be worth it.  It sounds like you aren't ready either.

 

As far as the meds, I agree with bluechick, that you shouldn't be playing doctor.  I don't really understand what you are doing.  Are you prescribed ritalin, but weren't taking it?  Is there a reason your pdoc gave for wanting to keep you on klonopin?

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Posted · Report post

I told my doctor that I couldn't focus and I was depressed all the time and just lying around trying not to just think of my problems. Being snappy at everybody and just in a bad place....He said it is okay to put you on the ritalin which I know I need to put in my signature but, he said I won't prescribe you klonopin since it's like a balancing act....So I was taking the ritalin and about the third day my anxiety shot thru the roof....I wasn't on any klonopin and I had none to wean off of...So I called the doctor and said I will just take the klonopin and deal with the depression....So I got put back on it and I got even more depressed. I mean like suicidal thinking...And so I started to cut the .5's in half and half the half to .125 and started to take my ritalin again and then I felt so at ease and I could think,I was no longer depressed and I have just taken 1 .125 since friday and well ya I am playing doctor, that is something I'm guily for.....

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Posted · Report post

Sorry if I jumped the gun.  If you are disabled or otherwise unable to work then by all means stay on aid.  I must have misunderstood your original post to mean that you could work but chose not to because you didn't want to lose your aid.  Sorry for my misinterpretation.

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