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Anyone on the schizophrenia spectrum want to share?

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This forum makes me feel less alone. In this moment i havent been more confused about my illness. But it feels comforting to know others that struggle with similar things. Right now im really mad at medications, treatment amd therapy. But i hope things get better. 

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19 hours ago, Angerr said:

This forum makes me feel less alone. In this moment i havent been more confused about my illness. But it feels comforting to know others that struggle with similar things. Right now im really mad at medications, treatment amd therapy. But i hope things get better. 

I'm glad this place makes you feel less alone..

Does the same for me..

It's all I have for an outlet..

 

I'm sorry your mad at your meds..treatment and therapy..

I often struggle with the same problems..

I do hope things get better..

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Had a breakup. It was as ‘nice’ as it could have been but am left feeling vulnerable and not great, meds aren’t working for the voices anymore but I’m due to start a new Med very soon, wish I had it now though...

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On 9/16/2018 at 8:46 AM, Kona said:

Had a breakup. It was as ‘nice’ as it could have been but am left feeling vulnerable and not great, meds aren’t working for the voices anymore but I’m due to start a new Med very soon, wish I had it now though...

I'm so sorry to hear you went through a breakup..

Hopefully in time you will mend..

 

I wish the voices would disappear soon for you..

New meds will help..

 

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My ex..the one that would hit me..

Punch holes in the walls..

That I'd patch up with my paintings..

He'd pound on doors while I hid and cried while he practically broke them down..

He'd scream and yell at me..

So scary..such a terrifying life..

 

He somehow got through the 5 call blocker apps on my phone and texted me twice....

Once angry..

Telling me what a piece of shit I am and various other things..

And going on and on..

And once saying he will never be over me and still loves me..

I never responded to either of his rantings..

 

This has triggered me to a place I don't like..

I'm having nightmares..

I'm scared he's going to find me..

Edited by coraline

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@Juniper29

Hopefully I am safe..

I know there's ways to find people..

There's sites to do that..

He doesn't know where I'm living..

I hope he stays dumb enough to not figure it out..

I just don't understand how he's getting through the call blockers..

 

He's a raging alcoholic..and texts me at all hours of the night while I'm asleep..

 

I just want him gone from my mind..

I don't know if he ever will be..

 

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7 hours ago, coraline said:

My ex..the one that would hit me..

Punch holes in the walls..

That I'd patch up with my paintings..

He'd pound on doors while I hid and cried while he practically broke them down..

He'd scream and yell at me..

So scary..such a terrifying life..

 

He somehow got through the 5 call blocker apps on my phone and texted me twice....

Once angry..

Telling me what a piece of shit I am and various other things..

And going on and on..

And once saying he will never be over me and still loves me..

I never responded to either of his rantings..

 

This has triggered me to a place I don't like..

I'm having nightmares..

I'm scared he's going to find me..

I would be scared too Cora. I hope you can stay safe. I hope you find a phone number blocker that works. I can do this directly on my phone itself. Can you do that on yours? Or is he using another person’s phone and texting you? Either way I hope it stops and he gives up. That makes me so mad that you were treated that way. You are too good and definitely don’t deserve any of that crap. I’m sorry you are now triggered and are having nightmares. 

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Finally discharged from residential and PHP. Got married last week (yay!). Now back to my real life. Having some delusions and SH thoughts. Pdoc wants to start me on clozapine but he isn't on the registry, so I have to see a resident from the mood disorder clinic on Monday. I'm hoping this will go smoothly and I'll tolerate the clozapine well. @Wonderful.Cheese we should compare experiences!

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11 hours ago, aura said:

Finally discharged from residential and PHP. Got married last week (yay!). Now back to my real life. Having some delusions and SH thoughts. Pdoc wants to start me on clozapine but he isn't on the registry, so I have to see a resident from the mood disorder clinic on Monday. I'm hoping this will go smoothly and I'll tolerate the clozapine well. @Wonderful.Cheese we should compare experiences!

Hey hi aura! So good to hear from you! Big congrats on getting married! Yay is right! I’m happy for you guys! :D Now to get to growing old and wrinkly together and all that good stuff! ;) My SIL had that in her vows! She is so funny. She recently got married too. I was a bridesmaid!

Yes those pesky delusions as they are called by others never seem to go away as scary or bothersome as they can be. I don’t SH but I’m sorry you are having those thoughts. Ugh. Stay safe, ok?

And most definitely let’s indeed compare experiences on our clozapine journeys! That will definitely be very helpful and less isolating! Good luck with your appointment on Monday. You will probably need lab work right away for the blood levels then if you are given a green light in the registry you can pick up your prescription!

Some take it twice a day, but my pdoc said once at bedtime since it’s so tiring. But I’d expect I’d need at least a baby dose in the morning eventually. My pdoc said I personally would need to be on clozapine plus stay on one other AAP. I’m hoping it can be abilify. But I’m open to her suggestions. Right now on 25 mg clozapine at bedtime, the starting dose.

Labs are weekly for 6 months, every other week for the next 6 months, then monthly from then on I believe she said. I have a bruise on my arm from the last draw so I hope it won’t cause any problems next Monday for next draw. I only got 7 pills at a time for now because of the need for labs to prove I’m good to go.

The pharmacist said it can cause a lot of weight gain, tiredness but my pdoc said it’s not as bad as some of the others I’m taking like seroquel?  So you’ll have to let me know what your mood dr says pretty please. I’m always looking for more info. 

Good luck chica and keep us posted! Thinking of you!

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15 hours ago, aura said:

Finally discharged from residential and PHP. Got married last week (yay!).

Congratulations!!!

Edited by Juniper29
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