Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

lifequake

Going to treatment

Recommended Posts

I'm going to a residential ED program soon.  The problem, in all honesty, is that I don't really want to work on my eating disorder.  I don't have some rah-rah idea about "recovery."

I do want to get on meds for bipolar and try to get out of mixed state hell.  I do want my family to have a break from worrying about me.

How do I engage in treatment when I feel hopeless?  I'm afraid they're going to kick me out due to my total depressive apathy.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I really hope this program will help you out with BP meds. I have no experience with residential ED programs, so I don't really know what you're getting into, but surely it has to be better than the hell you've been suffering recently. I think it's really brave of you to keep seeking treatment despite how long this mixed state has been going on.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, lifequake said:

I'm going to a residential ED program soon.  The problem, in all honesty, is that I don't really want to work on my eating disorder.  I don't have some rah-rah idea about "recovery."

I do want to get on meds for bipolar and try to get out of mixed state hell.  I do want my family to have a break from worrying about me.

How do I engage in treatment when I feel hopeless?  I'm afraid they're going to kick me out due to my total depressive apathy.

 

Did you decide on your own to go to the residential ED program?  Just asking because if your pdoc is sending you there, does s/he know you feel hopeless and that you don't want to work on your ED, at least now?

Maybe it might be more beneficial if you were to go the program when you are more wanting to help the ED?  Has your pdoc tried meds to help the bipolar and now can't think of what to do next?

However, maybe the meds given to you in the program will help your mood, so you might feel more like wanting to start dealing with the ED while you are there.

Edited by melissaw72

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
17 hours ago, aura said:

I really hope this program will help you out with BP meds. I have no experience with residential ED programs, so I don't really know what you're getting into, but surely it has to be better than the hell you've been suffering recently. I think it's really brave of you to keep seeking treatment despite how long this mixed state has been going on.

Thank you, aura.  I suppose you're right-- any treatment is better than no treatment.

9 hours ago, melissaw72 said:

Did you decide on your own to go to the residential ED program?  Just asking because if your pdoc is sending you there, does s/he know you feel hopeless and that you don't want to work on your ED, at least now?

Maybe it might be more beneficial if you were to go the program when you are more wanting to help the ED?  Has your pdoc tried meds to help the bipolar and now can't think of what to do next?

However, maybe the meds given to you in the program will help your mood, so you might feel more like wanting to start dealing with the ED while you are there.

My pdoc and the IP hospitals recommended residential treatment.  I've been really unstable, and nobody knows what else to try.

You're right that if my mood stabilized, I might have a shot at starting to deal with the ED and related issues.  It just seems so impossible right now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wish you the best, life! Getting the BP stable will make a difference in other areas of you life. (no pun intended!)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
38 minutes ago, lifequake said:

 

My pdoc and the IP hospitals recommended residential treatment.  I've been really unstable, and nobody knows what else to try.

You're right that if my mood stabilized, I might have a shot at starting to deal with the ED and related issues.  It just seems so impossible right now.

(bold) I can empathize.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm beyond terrified-- being admitted tomorrow morning.  I'm afraid I'm going to cuss out the staff, hulk out, and end up on an involuntary IP hold again.  I don't want anyone controlling or talking about my body.  :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, lifequake said:

I'm beyond terrified-- being admitted tomorrow morning.  I'm afraid I'm going to cuss out the staff, hulk out, and end up on an involuntary IP hold again.  I don't want anyone controlling or talking about my body.  :(

Hi lifequake, I really hope you getting admitted tomorrow will be helpful; you have really been struggling.

It would really suck if you were held on an involuntary hold again.  The only thing I can think of now is maybe writing down what you want to say to pdoc, so vent on paper then give it to pdoc if you want to, or not.  Idk if that is something realistic right now or not, just a thought.  Or maybe do you think there is a med that would help with the (anger? ... however you feel if you were to cuss the staff out?).  Do you think that would help, so maybe ask pdoc if there is something that can help you with that (so no involuntary IP hold)?

I can 100% understand what you mean by not wanting anyone controlling or talking about your body.  One thing I hate is when the staff/DRs (anyone) used to talk about me as if I wasn't standing right there.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for your reply and understanding.  I do hope meds can help tame the agitation/irritability.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know you might not be able to answer this (ie no access to computers) ... but I wondered how things are going?  I hope where you are is helping you.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


×