-Asphyxia-

i was ashamed of BPD

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12 years ago i had an assessment to find out what was wrong with me why i self injured and i was hell bent on killing myself in some form 

i was given the diagnoses BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER  at the time i felt it was hard for me to believe that i have it...i would say its something else 

when she diagnosed me with bpd and i still and am hearing voices and seeing things  i though she was wrong  i felt too ashamed to say i have it until a few months ago friends who also has bpd hear voices and see things too i never researched  BPD  for myself   i felt ashamed

so am reading about bpd In books and on-line blogs etc

and there are a lot of things i do that is normally what people with bpd do

for example i change my focus on things over and over  like from one faith to another faith ( i have  been Muslim , Buddhist   Hindu  Christian( i stick to Christianity more than any the others  faiths and one of my friends is a pastor  helps  me stay with Christianity  ) 

there is so much sigma about bpd ...people think we are attention seekers , dangerous , etc

am no longer ashamed of BPD i want to help people with bpd   just dont know how to start i cant volunteer as i need my husband to take me to the place and stay there with me as i have social anxiety and sometimes am too ill if he isn't with me  ...i need to try and be well before i can help everyone else .

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I've never heard of hearing voices as a BPD thing, a Schizo - Effective thing, yes. BPD, no. But I've been wrong before. You do also need to take care of yourself before others, when you have MI you're allowed to be selfish in that respect. Remember that. Your health is just as important as anyone else's. Another thing I sorta self taught myself also suffering anxiety is that when you have an attack acknowledge you are. Own it. Because ignoring it makes it worse and causes your anxiety to end up winning basically. It works for some people but not others. If you acknowledge it though, from what I read it helps. Then following with a, I'm ok, I'm safe, etc. sort of calming things. Maybe try it and see if it helps? I've had to leave places because of my anxiety, I went to a truck stop by my motel room to use their internet and work on my fanfic since I rarely leave the room and started having one. I told myself i'm not leaving over an anxiety attack because as soon as I get home, I'll be fine. so i stayed, and i was okay.

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I've met others who have had voices as part of BPD. It's certainly possible... and there's a lot of overlap between various diagnosis. Diagnosing is as much art as it is science. I personally don't put much stock in it, beyond "does this mean that we can find something that will help, now?"

OP, I think that you're exactly right - you can't help others until you can help yourself in some way. Now that you have a diagnosis, are there any ways that you can access that help?

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yup, ye olde BPD is merely a label to help signify what's going on, and what options you have.
i've heard voices when i've been particularly tired and distressed, and basically put it down to needing more self care - sleep, talking to someone, helping others by answering questions about hearing things on mental health forums....
you might find the following useful as an explanation of borderline diagnosis: http://thelastpsychiatrist.com/2007/10/the_diagnosis_of_borderline_pe.html

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On 4/16/2017 at 6:58 PM, ladyboss said:

I've never heard of hearing voices as a BPD thing, a Schizo - Effective thing, yes. BPD, no. But I've been wrong before. You do also need to take care of yourself before others, when you have MI you're allowed to be selfish in that respect. Remember that. Your health is just as important as anyone else's. Another thing I sorta self taught myself also suffering anxiety is that when you have an attack acknowledge you are. Own it. Because ignoring it makes it worse and causes your anxiety to end up winning basically. It works for some people but not others. If you acknowledge it though, from what I read it helps. Then following with a, I'm ok, I'm safe, etc. sort of calming things. Maybe try it and see if it helps? I've had to leave places because of my anxiety, I went to a truck stop by my motel room to use their internet and work on my fanfic since I rarely leave the room and started having one. I told myself i'm not leaving over an anxiety attack because as soon as I get home, I'll be fine. so i stayed, and i was okay.

Strong work, it's hard trying to talk yourself down, I know I've BAD W/depression and anxiety and a slew of medical issues. And screw the people that saw your faking or tough it out or just stop it.

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I was devestated when they said I could have BPD. To me, it meant I was a bad person. 

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You might be able to get meds for the social anxiety tho (if you don't have, on my phone I can't see) 

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On 5/2/2017 at 1:34 AM, mcjimjam said:

I was devestated when they said I could have BPD. To me, it meant I was a bad person. 

Mental illness is not contagious. I was forty when they finally got my diagnosis right. Then all of sudden my parents decided to tell us (I've a twin sister with the same diagnosis) that mental is in our family history one both sides of the family. Would have enough nice to know when I first started to see a shrink. Anyway, it's not a death sentence, or it shouldn't be. Read about your illness so you can understand your illness. And you don't have to tell anyone you don't have to. It's really nobody's business. But if you are knowledgeable, then when someone asks you a guestion you can answer it intelligently. You'd be surprised they number of people that say I'm on this medication or that medication. Good luck and hang on. It can get easier. 

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