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ideallymark

i'm not sure what to do.

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I have tried to stop self harming and it's not working. I have been cutting for a little over 2 years and have tried to stop multiple times, but with no luck. I had stopped for about 3 months and relapsed about an hour ago. I can't control myself when I feel emotions and I absolutely hate it. I can't talk about it in person, or I break down. Any replies would be nice. I would just like to talk to people that don't know me as a person and have never met me, it helps a lot.

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It's really challenging to find other ways to regulate emotions without self harming once that's become a "go to" method. It's something that's helping you in the short term to deal with what's going on, but sadly causes more problems in the long run.

One of the best ways to learn some of these skills is through a fairly intensive program called dialectical behavioral therapy. It's annoying as shit to learn, and obnoxious to use sometimes, but it can really be a game changer. The "full meal deal' of DBT consists of a weekly psychoeducation group, a weekly individual session to help apply the skills to your situation, phone coaching for skills in the moment, psych med consult, and a weekly treatment team meeting (happens without participants). It's not the only way to address self harming, but it's a really comprehensive way to dig in and pick up alternative ways to deal with life.

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Hi @ideallymark! I do not have problems with self hatming (I have anxiety and depression ) but I have a lot of experience in trying to change unhelpful behavior patterns.

  One thing that I noticed about your post is that you say you have tried to stop self harming with " no success" and then you go on to say that you (successfully ☺) stopped self harming for 3 months. The fact that you have returned to old behaviors does not take away the time where you weren't self harming! Maybe you could give yourself some credit for what you achieved? 

I second the idea of finding a program or therapist to help you. 

Good luck!

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I think Wooster and amskray make great points. I especially agree with the fact that 3 months is a success and you can keep building on it. Finding alternatives to the times when you would previously self injure is absolutely essential, and you're probably going to have to try a lot of different things to see which ones work for you. You did 3 months once. You can do it again. Over time you'll be able to go longer

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