Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

Recommended Posts

   

Hello crazyboards,

All of a sudden, I have been depressed over the past couple days.  For a while now I have been on a path of personal growth, and trying to improve my life by continuing to make gradual changes and be a more active participant in life.  A lot of the positive changes have enriched my life greatly.  One of the positive changes I made, was attempting to dump my crazy ex who has proven *impossible* to get rid of. (But that is another story for another thread.)  To be honest, some days are difficult.  I have been going through a lot of transitions.  I recently had a milestone birthday (30), I have out grown a lot of the people in my life (who are actually pretty effed up individuals under the surface), and there has been serious strain on close relationships.  

To try to help manage some of the stress I saw a healer for some energy work.  Afterward, it seemed to help tremendously.  For a solid month I was full of energy, taking excellent care of myself, and very productive.  Cue two days ago, and the honeymoon phase is over.  All of a sudden this silent depression started creeping in.  On a surface level I feel that I have nothing to be terribly depressed about.  On a deeper level, I know that my life is less than ideal.  The difference, is that I am usually filled with a positive "can do" attitude about improving it.  Of course, there is also the ever-present struggle with the illness which many of us can sometimes be in denial about. 

So for whatever reason, it happened.  I got depressed.  Not-sad, melancholy, hopeless, overcome with emotion,-depressed.  Just depressed.  I think it started when I tried to do a positive thing for myself, at which I failed.  About five days ago I attempted to finally quit nicotine gum for good.  I quickly realized that this simply would not be possible for me at this time in my life. 

Lately, I have little motivation to do anything.  For about a week now, I have gone back to taking poor care of myself and eating poorly.  Nothing sounds "inviting" to me when I think of fun things I could do.  My emotions are dulled, yet on some level I feel this pesky throbbing ache coming from somewhere...Like as if I were getting hit with a hammer...in the heart.   

I am writing this thread for no other reason than to just say that depression blows....the big one.  And if you are reading this and you are depressed, you are not the only one.

I am going to fight it though.  I am going to continue to do non-depressive things until my attitude follows my life style.  In the meantime, it sucks trying to function when you are "running on empty" so to speak.    

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

With depression there is nothing you did to cause it and needs no reason to appear. Depression is not an attitude, it is a serious illness. Good luck with smiling your way out  of depression.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
40 minutes ago, notloki said:

With depression there is nothing you did to cause it and needs no reason to appear. Depression is not an attitude, it is a serious illness. Good luck with smiling your way out  of depression.

i dont agree its the best way either, but suggest getting some help perhaps

2 hours ago, AbilifyedBunny said:

   

Hello crazyboards,

All of a sudden, I have been depressed over the past couple days.  For a while now I have been on a path of personal growth, and trying to improve my life by continuing to make gradual changes and be a more active participant in life.  A lot of the positive changes have enriched my life greatly.  One of the positive changes I made, was attempting to dump my crazy ex who has proven *impossible* to get rid of. (But that is another story for another thread.)  To be honest, some days are difficult.  I have been going through a lot of transitions.  I recently had a milestone birthday (30), I have out grown a lot of the people in my life (who are actually pretty effed up individuals under the surface), and there has been serious strain on close relationships.  

To try to help manage some of the stress I saw a healer for some energy work.  Afterward, it seemed to help tremendously.  For a solid month I was full of energy, taking excellent care of myself, and very productive.  Cue two days ago, and the honeymoon phase is over.  All of a sudden this silent depression started creeping in.  On a surface level I feel that I have nothing to be terribly depressed about.  On a deeper level, I know that my life is less than ideal.  The difference, is that I am usually filled with a positive "can do" attitude about improving it.  Of course, there is also the ever-present struggle with the illness which many of us can sometimes be in denial about. 

So for whatever reason, it happened.  I got depressed.  Not-sad, melancholy, hopeless, overcome with emotion,-depressed.  Just depressed.  I think it started when I tried to do a positive thing for myself, at which I failed.  About five days ago I attempted to finally quit nicotine gum for good.  I quickly realized that this simply would not be possible for me at this time in my life. 

Lately, I have little motivation to do anything.  For about a week now, I have gone back to taking poor care of myself and eating poorly.  Nothing sounds "inviting" to me when I think of fun things I could do.  My emotions are dulled, yet on some level I feel this pesky throbbing ache coming from somewhere...Like as if I were getting hit with a hammer...in the heart.   

I am writing this thread for no other reason than to just say that depression blows....the big one.  And if you are reading this and you are depressed, you are not the only one.

I am going to fight it though.  I am going to continue to do non-depressive things until my attitude follows my life style.  In the meantime, it sucks trying to function when you are "running on empty" so to speak.    

get to a doctor, pref a psychiatrist and get some help, a therapist as well, if all else fails your pcp.............depression is a B** dont fight it alone

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, looking for answers said:

i dont agree its the best way either, but suggest getting some help perhaps

get to a doctor, pref a psychiatrist and get some help, a therapist as well, if all else fails your pcp.............depression is a B** dont fight it alone

I agree.  Luckily I am seeing my psychiatrist this week.  Depression definitely can have a life of its own at times.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, AbilifyedBunny said:

I agree.  Luckily I am seeing my psychiatrist this week.  Depression definitely can have a life of its own at times.

great, let us know how it goes

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, notloki said:

With depression there is nothing you did to cause it and needs no reason to appear. Depression is not an attitude, it is a serious illness. Good luck with smiling your way out  of depression.

For some odd reason my reply did not show up after I posted it.  In less words, I will restate what I had said before:

You do not need to explain this to someone who has suffered from crippling clinical depressions throughout their teens and adulthood.  I am not on that band wagon of people who think that depression is a choice that a person makes or does not require treatment.  While there are some types of depression that cannot be helped with willful postivity, and they are *not* to be minimized, there are symptoms that can be better managed through ones thoughts, actions, attitudes, and choices.  I have had depressions that lasted longer because I chose to wallow in my issues, whereas others dissipated quicker as I made healthier choices for myself.  If there were no catharsis in positive self-talk, constructive behavior, coping skills, self-reflection, and insight there would be no need for therapists.  Yet therapists help many people in ways that medications alone cannot.  My therapist sometimes reminds me that medication will not do all of the work.  Many people benefit from CBT because it helps to adjust thinking, which can play a direct role in severity of symptoms.  Good choices must be made all the while.  It is not for you to decide what works or doesn't work for another person.  Also, I regularly see a psychiatrist so it is not as though I am trying to act like a chemical component does not exist.       

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My latest depression, making it my third clinical, came while things were going great for me...

I was working plenty, dating, etc...felt good, was on the right track.

Gradually I started missing days of work, saw my energy leaving, started feeling more anxiety, admit tingly there were a couple of stressful things involved...Until finally I realized I relapsed.  Nothing I could do to stop it, still battling to get out of it 5 months later.  Depression is one where I definitely agree it's chemical and you can't always stop it on your own...

Edited by BrianOCD

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 hours ago, BrianOCD said:

My latest depression, making it my third clinical, came while things were going great for me...

I was working plenty, dating, etc...felt good, was on the right track.

Gradually I started missing days of work, saw my energy leaving, started feeling more anxiety, admit tingly there were a couple of stressful things involved...Until finally I realized I relapsed.  Nothing I could do to stop it, still battling to get out of it 5 months later.  Depression is one where I definitely agree it's chemical and you can't always stop it on your own...

I hear you.  I have had a similar experience.  It's definitely not easy, but it's good that you had the insight to realize that it was not your fault.  Not everybody realizes that.       

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

*I think what I said was misinterpreted.  I did not for one second mean that I was going to try combat depression through wishful thinking or willpower.  What I meant was that I wasn't going to allow myself to stay "stuck" in depression.  While in treatment, I have continued healthy habits and functioning to the best of my ability.  What I meant was that I will continue to take therapeutic action *while* the treatment takes effect.  It wasn't meant to be a literal thing, although I can see why it was misinterpreted by some.  In a clinical depression, it is not always possible to continue with daily functioning depending on the severity but fortunately at the moment I can.  I do believe it can help.  I have also been advised by treatment providers that it can, although I am not a professional so take what I say with a grain of salt.  No, depression is not simply going to go away by its self.  It is a serious psychiatric disorder.  I realize that.  But one can choose whether or not they get help which is half of the battle.  After receiving proper treatment what you do is up to you.  Staying active and making healthy choices is effective for me.  I cannot speak for others.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I believe there are different levels of depression and some respond well to positivity and mindfulness. There also are depressions so thick with chemical imbalance that meds are the only effective treatment. In between, I believe both approaches help. The challenge is recognizing where on the spectrum your symptoms are. If positive attitude and healthfulness either aren't working or aren't possible, it's time to see the doc. Don't be fooled that you are too lazy to implement a more positive lifestyle. That you aren't suggests a med change is possibly necessary.

Edited by Stacia

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


  • Similar Content

    • By Carrie26a
      My Dr recommended that I try ketamine for my depression. I have bipolar 1, anxiety and depression. I've heard of this being a street drug so I'm nervous to try it. I wondered about others experiences. 
    • By ReincarnatedCow
      I'm not suicidal, at least I don't think I am at the moment.  I do have plans in place for if something goes wrong but i'm fully aware I wont act on them. But if someone were to pull a gun on me or something like that, I would most likely tip him. I'm not actively trying to kill myself, but I would not mind dying. Can anyone else relate or am I going crazy?
    • By mmaryland
      Does anyone else have experience with Rexulti completely destroying their depression? For me, Rexulti almost had a same day anti-depressant effect and controls depressive episodes acutely and astoundingly fast. I literally feel anti-depressant effects in as little as 3 hours after I take it. When I look back to when I was on it, I now realize that I didn't have a single bout of depression during that time, it just was not super effective in controlling mania. I think Rexulti is a hell of an anti-depressant, a way improved drug than abilify with less than half the side effects, no lethargy or cognitive impairment either which is always surprising to find in an antipsychotic. I know it has an indication for adjunctive therapy in adults with MDD but none for bipolar depression... maybe Lundbeck is just waiting for close to the expiration of the patent before the release new clinical trial data and extend their patent after they get the bipolar depression indication approved, but that's just a thought.
      Anyone else have a similar experience with Rexulti, brexpiprazole? Please let me know about your time on the medication and if it sat well with you or not so much. Interested in if others are also getting this rapid and significant anti-depressant effect from this drug or if it's just me
    • By SilentlyScreaming
      So I'm going to make this short and sweet for you all.
      Lately, I've been suffering big time with depression. I find it hard to get out of bed the past week. It's a miracle when I make it to shower. Even then it's only for like 10 minutes. I barely eat, sleep has been uneventful. It's either I wake up every few minutes or I sleep too much. There's no in-between.
      And I only leave the house for appointments.
      I know the answer may seem simple... get out of bed. But it's becoming increasingly difficult. Does anyone have any advice? Is this just me?
    • By maxor
      Hello Comrades,
      I've been taking Sertraline (50mg daily) for 9 months now.
      Reason for taking Sertraline: Depression & SAD. Maybe some GAD.
      So Sertraline treats my baseline anxiety quite well, also got rid of digestion problems, but I am struggling with side effects:
      Motor restlessness, agitation. I've always been quite "hyperactive", but Sertraline has worsened it by a good amount. I cannot sit still, I feel I have to walk, to pace. I move my fingers and toes to "release" some of the energy. Also lots of fidgeting, rocking back and forth. I have the urge to crawl out of my skin.
      _ Indifference, amotivation, apathy, lethargy. I get less things done on Sertraline than before Sertraline. Just want to sit around and do nothing. It is really disconcerting, because things would happen like a major car malfunction or someone f*ck*ng me over and I'd be thinking "this SHOULD piss me off, but, meh.. whatever.."! I've been doing some reading & research and there is the hypothesis that SSRI-induced-stimulation of 5HT2C & 5HT2A receptors dampens the dopaminergic transmission in the prefrontal cortex thus causing these specific SSRI side effects. Antagonism / Inverse Agonism of these receptors should theoretically resolve the problem. What medications do antagonize / inverse agonize these receptors? Are there any other reliable theories on what is causing this? And what could help?
      _ Sleep disturbances, f*ck*d up sleep cycle, crappy sleep. Falling asleep is difficult, shallow sleep, waking up a lot in the night => daytime fatigue. (This week I've been sleeping a lot, maybe because the body wants to compensate for last months's bad sleep?)
      _ Heat intolerance + hot flashes. My entire life I've been loving warmth and heat. I was the guy who could sit at the top row in the sauna for 20min @ 100°C (212 °F), but right now I cannot even stand a mild summer. And I have been getting hot flashes lasting between 10-15 mins several times a day (I am a 29 year old male, so pretty sure it is not menopause related)
      _ I also lost quite a bit of weight, partially due to loss of appetite, but also due to increased metabolic rate. My appetite is back to normal, but I am still not gaining any weight. BMI 20 right now.
      _ Palpitations (BUM BUM BUM BUM. BUM . . . BUM . . . BUM)
      _ mild headaches and "pressure" in my neck. Nothing bad, but very annoying in the mid and long term. Now I don't know what to do. I need some meds with "less" side effects. I haven't tried any combination of medications yet. To my dismay my doc prefers the SSRI merry go around aka SSRI carousel. I found a new psychiatrist and I will have a first appointment in about a month, but I don't know what to suggest to him. Has anybody some experience with a similar situation? Which antidepressant would be suitable for me? If there is someone who had the same problem and found some solution: please write me. Thank you. Greetings from Germany!
       
×