i've been having this thing where my eating disorder and adhd kind of combine forces: i'll take 10mg ritalin LA (+150mg bupropion) in the morning, not feel hungry all day, then when it wears off and i get hungry again i overeat, feel guilty, and struggle not to vom. tbh even if it's a normal amount of food i'll feel bloated and want to vom.
sometimes i'll try to get myself to eat while the medication's still in effect by smoking weed, but i end up b/ping almost 100% of the time. i'm seeing my psychiatrist soon so i'll discuss this with them, but i'm curious if anyone else has had these experiences.
Since starting Wellbutrin last august i have felt fairly stable as far as my depression goes. I have felt normal and sometimes almost upbeat in a way that did not slip into euphoria. I started taking Ritalin last year or this year due to insurance issues with my nuvigil for narcolepsy. I also had a......traumatic?? life experience where I learned that my husband had cheated on me and may have gotten this girl knocked up. We are trying to work things out, and I've been dealing, but it is hard. It constantly plays through my mind. She is always between us. That had a big triggering effect on me. Since then, back in April, I have been utilizing my support group and working on building myself back up and redefining my reality. It is a lot of work, but I have managed and I am learning to deal with it better.
Lately though, I have felt my anxiety crawling up. I have also been super emotional. Crying for no obvious reason (in that moment, i will be fine and then something as minor as a sigh can trigger tears). I am aware that wellbutrin can cause issues with anxiety. Mine has always been very high though. Can anxiety cause you to cry like depression does? I'm not saying I'm not depressed right now....Just...I don't even know what I am trying to say or ask. I can't think. My thoughts are so disorganized right now. I did have two cups of coffee this morning..
One day I'll be perfectly fine and stable. The next day I may be overly emotional. The next day I may be good again. The next,awful or bad. I started keeping a mood chart about a month ago and it looks like an active seismograph! From day to day I cannot say how I might feel. To my knowledge I have not been diagnosed with rapid cycling anything, but my pdoc is still getting to know me. I was already medicated when I started seeing him with tweaks here and there.
I've also learned I do not deal well with change. My husband started a new job and works as a mechanic during the day and a tow truck driver on nights and weekends so it feels like he is always gone. It going to take a lot of adjustment and I have not been handling it well.
I've spent the last year applying for jobs and I cannot get hired anywhere. Part of me is thankful because I"m not sure how I would handle working around people, but a part of me is highly disappointed because I want to work. It feels so controversial. I do not want to just bum around and be completely dependent on anyone, but at the same time I am TERRIFIED of getting into the workforce again. I haven't worked in years because I have been home caring for children. Now, they are all in school and I worry, if I find a job then who will be home with them when they are sick? Who will take them to appointments? Things like that. What if I get a job and I can't control my emotions? I break down or have a very irritable day/s? I stay irritable. I always have. I can fake the happy personality, but I won't excel at my job doing that I don't think. I learn slow. I would once again have to adjust to something new. I avoid watching most tv, and listening to a lot of music as well as being around most people because I'm worried I'll be triggered into one emotion or another and not be able to pull myself out of it.
People have asked me more than once why have I not applied for SSI?
It seems so final I guess. I guess I'm worried that there will be no turning back if I do that. What else am I going to do though? I'm not doing anything currently except for being a money pit. I need to do something to help our household. I feel...what is the word...inept? useless? I'm not sure. I do not even know if my symptoms are uncontrolled enough to qualify if that is a thing. Do you have to be constantly uncontrolled to qualify?
I am sorry the post was so long. I apologize again for being all over the place. I needed to get all of that out, but I had no idea how.
I tell everyone that "I am fine." /sigh
Since I've been on Effexor for 7 months, I've had zero emotional depressive symptoms (like the crying, sadness etc) negative ruminations have lessened, no anxiety whatsoever either...
Issue is, I've become more & more lethargic. I sleep a full 10 hours per night and then I cannot get out of bed. I'm not really tired, I just literally cannot get myself to do anything. I am super content just laying in bed for hours. I read crap online for hours, I often take 2 hour naps in afternoon. It pains me to take a shower & go outside. I procrastinate on work/everything... I avoid doing things I need to do just so i can lay in bed! No interest, motivation, pleasure in anything. How can I light a "fire under my ass" again? The same issue happens with other meds that work for depression, but then they cause this!
And no, my doc won't increase my Ritalin (which I have a tolerance to & it stopped working). She won't put me on any other stimulants which seem to be the only thing that help me in this state. Yes, I've tried Abilify add-on...not sure if I want to keep adding more meds or if there something better I can switch out in my situation?
Seems my choice is to either be emotionally depressed or a complete apathetic sloth!!! Any ideas?
Hi, so 15 years ago I was on Dexedrine for several years and it helped me SO much. Well, ended up going off of it a few years ago, cannot remember why, but now that I needed a stimulant again, they’re telling me aderal (sp) is all they prescribe. Or at LEAST they don’t prescribe dex anymore. They say it isn’t made anymore? But I’ve read some here do take it unless those were old posts...Anyway! The adereral makes me irritable and works some but not great like the other did.
Im trying to find suggestions of another I could try that won’t give the irritability and something extended release that won’t keep me up all night!
Ritalin made me fly through the damned roof.
I have bipolar 1 and chronic lethargy, and probable ADD.
Any help greatly appreciated.
Edit: I’m sorry I cannot figure out how to put all my stats in as a tag line! Really AM getting old, or just too freaking depressed.
Does anyone have strong heart pounding sensations from meds? It does not feel like it's racing, just beating really strong sometimes, I notice at bedtime. I wonder if its the combo of Ritalin + Effexor? I've been taking a 2nd Ritalin in the afternoons. I usually have low blood pressure, but wondering if meds can really change that as well?
My parents both had heart attacks quite young (50's) If I get an EKG is that really enough to assess that my heart is perfectly fine? Are there other tests to get? I heard that an EKG cannot always predict that you have a heart condition. It did not predict my mothers problems - her EKG never detected anything wrong, yet she would experience missing heart beats and/or tachardia sometimes during the night.