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About sugarsugar

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  1. Alcohol has calories too and if you restrict your calories and include alcohol you are eating an even less nutrient dense diet. As someone who used to consume probably 80% of my calories from alcohol, I can say it’s not conducive to health. I made every argument about how alcohol wasn’t the problem when I drank and eventually I saw it actually was a problem. I suspect you may find that too especially if you have someone already feeling you need your drinking monitored. Having been down the food and alcohol paths myself I know how hard it can be to deal with them when you feel bad already. I wish it had been as easy as just having people tell me to lose weight and quit drinking. I think if you aren’t seeing a pdoc or tdoc already you may find it helpful. For me “stopping “ something wasn’t enough, I needed therapy and meds in the equation. Again, maybe you’re already there, I don’t know. Good luck on the changes, they’re not easy , I know.
  2. Thyroid can mess with a lot of things. I also had anti thyroid antibodies tested. That was enlightening. Hope you get some answers that help your hormones.
  3. sugarsugar


    My question is, if there really is a camera in your bedroom, and from the videos you should be able to tell where it is, why not find it and remove it? If you can’t find it, hmmm, well does it really exist? You said he was cold and had no empathy, that seems concerning. I think you are right to have concerns. But it’s hard to know what exactly is going on.
  4. sugarsugar

    Relationships and Finances

    For me, this wouldn’t be acceptable, but that’s me. Personal bills might include other things I wouldn’t agree are essential, I don’t know. I agree on the downsizing listed above. Another option is, could the whole joint living situation be downsized? If he lived alone what would he do to make ends meet? Get another job? I’m all about getting another job to make more money if it’s needed but I’ve realized that’s not everyone’s priority. I don’t think there’s a right answer but I think if there’s conflict around it there needs to be discussion. If one person is working extra and the other makes less but won’t work more, seems like a values mismatch. What “personal bills “ consist of would be part of the question. Could they be pared back? Does that include going out to restaurants, buying things, optional expenses? Credit card debt? Those are a choice. I look at this from my own personal perspective and biases and don’t even claim it’s how everyone should see it but fwiw that’s my take on things. I wouldn’t be happy and I’d want to have some budget planning and analysis. True, not everyone earns the same, but there’s more than that going on here.
  5. I guess my first question is, is your current med regime working, or not? If it’s working well, why change? If it’s not—well, that’s different maybe but I’d still want to feel listened to. One thing I like about my pdoc is that he seems to have reviewed my chart before each appointment. That’s a huge plus for me. If you aren’t comfortable with the plan, maybe try to discuss that more? I know some pdocs have a favorite approach and that’s that but after all, it affects you directly so you should get a say, IMO.
  6. sugarsugar

    What are your therapy goals ?

    Last time I was in therapy my goals were: be able to drive on freeways and in new places; control spending; be motivated to be more social in my off time; stop semi-hoarding. I didn’t have much luck but still think those are good goals.
  7. sugarsugar


    Ditch this guy. He is taking advantage of your vulnerability and mental illness. He is not good for you, get him out of your life. Sometimes you need someone to point that out.
  8. sugarsugar


    It can be ok but this makes you feel bad and is risky so you need to stop. Are you taking your meds? Talking to your pdoc? This is something you need to get a handle on because it’s causing you stress and distress. I’ve been there myself. Call your pdoc and explain, you are having impulse control issues again and need help.
  9. sugarsugar

    tell me your disaster roommate stories

    He had to quit school and go back to live with his parents. I never heard from him again but suspect he had difficulty, that was before anyone had ever heard of bulimia or had much for eating disorders. He was even more messed up than I was, and I was very unstable at that age, in retrospect. But as a roommate, he was a disaster.
  10. sugarsugar

    12-step groups

    As I see it, 12 step meetings are mainly a social support group and worked for me better than the small number of group therapy sessions I attended. I never considered it a religion and pretty much politely ignored that aspect. I suppose there’s a force larger than me but I never felt the need to name it or think too much about it. I basically interpreted the steps to make sense for me but it’s true some other steppers thought I did things wrong. I suggest getting what you can from it and don’t worry too much about some of the parts that may not work. It can be a great support or at least my groups were. And that’s a valuable thing.
  11. sugarsugar

    tell me your disaster roommate stories

    Ok this goes way back. I used to liin a house with 4 other students. One guy was what we know now as bulimic. We bought food separately. In the night, he’d sneak down and eat all of everyone’s food. Come morning, no groceries left. As you might imagine, this didn’t go well with broke students. We started hiding our food, but he searched our rooms when we were gone, and stole food plus money and other items. He was my worst roommate ever and there’s even more to the story but you get the idea.
  12. sugarsugar

    12-step groups

    I used to go to many 12 step meetings. AA, al anon, CODA, EA, etc. I don’t even remember them all, most I only went to a small number but AA many meetings. For AA, my best bet were the atheist/agnostic meetings because they obviously didn’t push the pseudo religion. I also went to women only meetings sometimes. Mainly though I learned to pick and choose my groups. Some were just not a good mix, some were wonderful. I basically ignored the higher power aspect. I never worked steps. No one would be my sponsor so I finally gave up on that. I found AA the best, the offshoots weren’t for me but that was just me. I did best when I found groups I could bond with and socialize, or the groups where I really could relate to the others in some way. It took going to a lot of bad meetings to find the ones good for me. Then I went there a lot. 12 step meetings were a means to an end for me and I never felt the need to do exactly what they said. I took what worked and ignored the rest. They were a very important part of my life and I don’t regret any of it. And no I wasn’t court ordered. I actually miss what I had from them.
  13. Yes I’m interested. I have been through the bs of being told just wait for new drugs, etc, and it was a definite low point.
  14. sugarsugar

    Hypomania in Bipolar I ?

    First off, by the time I got diagnosed I had pretty clearly been misdiagnosed for years, and no idea if I’d been manic or hypomanic except in retrospect. I was labeled bp1 because the symptoms were severe enough and lasted several months. Since then I have been hypomanic at times and other times like maybe now at the edge of even and hypomanic. I have no understanding of mixed states so can’t comment there. So yes I’m labeled bp1 but get hypo. If I never get fully manic again I will consider myself very lucky and very happy because that was pretty disruptive to my life.
  15. I have been exposed to that and really resented it. I tried very hard to be happy, did affirmations, visualization, all that crap to no avail. Proper meds helped and now I don’t have to knock myself out to feel decent. This pdoc has obviously never had a major depression. I hope an unexpected opening happens with a new pdoc. Until then, good luck with this one. Sounds like you’ll need great patience to deal with her.