Jump to content
Software Update Finished, feedback welcome Read more... ×
CrazyBoards.org

Blahblah

Member
  • Content Count

    1206
  • Joined

  • Last visited

About Blahblah

  • Rank
    Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Unicorn

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. Blahblah

    Time for a new word association thread

    diamonds
  2. Blahblah

    Time for a new word association thread

    spiders
  3. Blahblah

    How Do You Feel THIS MOMENT in Time?

    Missing someone that recently left CB Wondering how she's doing this week. Other than that, very tired.
  4. @lefer I can imagine what a hard place that would be! Even tougher as you get older....When you talk to pdoc or therapists, do they give you any hope or encouragement that you can overcome this? And get back into living an independent life? @Juniper29 Ugh. That is the worst. When you realize (in retrospect) sh*t I should've put foot in mouth....stopped myself before speaking... Pretty harsh punishment though, when you apologize and try to explain, then you're accused of making excuses or "playing the victim card" or something. I wonder if there is any other effective way to reconcile a friendship after this kind of stuff happens?
  5. Blahblah

    Feeling Kinda Weird

    @Alien Navel Cord You mention you've been Hypo for over a month. How do you differentiate hypomania from just a normal, good, positive, productive mood? Sounds like at moment, you are not OVERLY energetic, positive, irritable, or lacking full night's sleep? We aren't robots - nobody has a 100% even, unemotional, non-variable mood every month. I have chronic depression & recurrent MDD, but about once (every 3 years) I hit a "good" spell (period of 3- 6 mos or more) where I am productive, content, happy, positive, and my sleep, appetite, daily routines stable and unchanged. The only "abnormal" behavior could be talking too much..and a touch of increased irritability (but we are human, these are not necessarily abnormal behaviors right?) Especially if they are not causing issue/harm for yourself or others.
  6. I had an "adolescent crisis" around age 18, and 2 decades later... it has still not ended!!
  7. Did you lash out in anger at these people or did they just disappear for no reason of your doing? Do you owe them any apology? Have you reached out to them and they just ignore you? In my case (and many others here) the "Normal" friends I've had (who have never experienced real mental illness) don't understand. I've often wished for more connection and empathy, but I've learned that is expecting too much. I've often been "ghosted" by friends when I needed their support the most. Most people are selfish, flakey and non-committal. It is isolating. i now hide the fact that I've been battling major depression over 20 years of my life. I have only very "superficial" friendships - which to me, are not even worth the time or efforts. These types of friends are only around when it's fun & convenient for them. These "friends" are "soooooo busy..." maybe will join you for a drink every 3 months, no more. Not satisfying. I go to many social activities, but although surrounded by people, I'm still suffering and very much alone.
  8. Same here (well, Effexor & Ritalin, pdoc won't yet prescribe Adderall) Same diagnosis as well. Its good to hear that it has worked well for you for a long time and hasn't pooped out.
  9. I think yes, to-do lists are helpful and prioritization is really key. I've been told to try and tackle the "most difficult" tasks (or tasks that require the most energy) first or as soon as possible (or when I have the most energy). But try not to beat myself up if i only accomplish a few of the low-level tasks, I think with depression (TRD in particular) you must give yourself credit for anything you finish!!! and try to reward yourself. Some days I don't do anything on the list, and maybe there are days when I go above and beyond. If you are feeling paralyzed just do the smallest baby step that you can cross off that list!
  10. @BrianOCD Does your pdoc have a plan if you continue to see no improvement? I know how that feels, when you're sliding downward and just waiting waiting waiting for some relief. Med after med. Seems like it won't end. Will it soon be time to increase dose or add something different? Stimulants are literally the only thing that helps my apathy and anhedonia. Keep moving.
  11. I need feedback here. Diagnosis is major/chronic longterm depression (20 years). I can't even identify distinct "episodes" or breaks from it. I'm always low mood, depressed, worthless & discouraged (often intolerably so). I've been on my med combo for quite awhile (Lamictal & now Ritalin) I have recently changed my work/ living environment, and as result, becoming much busier - more hyper-focused on working, thinking, reading and writing. More socially engaged too. Basically, happy. Mentally engaged (without ruminations) for the first time in over 10 years.... It is very foreign/weird for me to feel this way. I do NOT have sleep issues (sleep 8-9 hours every night), eat well, energy level is normal, no destructive or risky behaviors of any kind (i.e. feeling on top of world, spending sprees, drinking alot, risky behaviors). I just feel really motivated, determined, engaged and good. Only other behavior is talking and writing A LOT. (I don't have racing thoughts or speech.) Just overdoing these 2 things. Also, I notice I've been more impatient. Like thinking to myself " let's get this done already, get on with it...." Does this seem like Hypomania? Or is this just a bit of a safe "elevated mood?" Should I be worried? I want to maintain this mood state. I can't handle being severely depressed any longer & I'm so afraid when it will return.
  12. Thanks for sharing! I'd love to find more cartoon type illustrators that do work like this.
  13. Blahblah

    How Do You Feel THIS MOMENT in Time?

    I'm fighting this feeling constantly. Its the worst when I go online/ social media and see other people's achievements, (specifically career, happy family, etc). Like I'll never measure up to anything. Already nearing middle age. Why try.
  14. Blahblah

    Time for a new word association thread

    plane
  15. Thanks @sming You can probably relate to my sense of my desperation to try and do whatever it takes to maintain the efficacy and keep it working for my broken brain. It was my pdoc that kept saying all I need to to is "take weekend med breaks or med holidays" like that's the typical protocol and will prevent this rapid tolerance stuff. Best of luck to you as well!
×