I lost the remaining contact with the persons I knew some years ago because in a crisis I wrote them some stuff that was bottled inside.
Does anyone else lost all their friends because of your illness or since your illness, with a reason or without reason?
And what do you do now?
It's the week before Thanksgiving and not one person has invited me to their home or to get together to celebrate Thanksgiving.
I go thru this every year and suddenly Thanksgiving is 4 days away.
I usually prepare my own special dinner to ward off feelings of isolation during this holiday, this year, I was too depressed to even think ahead.
Now it's 4 days away, no one has invited me and I didn't buy any food to prepare. I have to have food delivered because I am disabled and cannot drive.
It's too late to order thru my grocery delivery as I'm sure the store is out of most of the things I usually get to make.
So, now depression is inking in big time and my thinking is that since no one invited me, I must not be regarded as a close enough friend to be considered to sit at their table for Thanksgiving and causing me to rethink who is on my friend list. I feel soo abandoned and very sad.
How does Loneliness effect you? Any meds that help? All articles suggest that being active in regular social activities, any type of socializing, CBT, therapy, all help - but what if it doesn't for you? What if you have no friends you can depend on or trust? What if socializing with strangers, frequent group meetups, events, hobbies makes you feel worse? What if you are unable to work and have no regular in-person interaction with people?
"Cacioppo’s key insight was that loneliness is fundamentally a biological problem....And so is its most profound effect – death. Analysis of 300,000 people in 148 studies found that loneliness is associated with a 50% increase in mortality from any cause. This makes it comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and more dangerous than obesity.
....said Cacioppo, we evolved to experience social rejection in the same way as physical pain. Brain scans have shown that “social pain”, such as being shunned by a community, activates the same region – the dorsal anterior cingulate – as bodily trauma."
How am I supposed to feel when I'm labeled crazy or not normal? A confident told me I'm not normal. Naturally at first I felt defiant, nah that ain't me. But when it hits and you start to believe it, loneliness becomes reality. Invisble barriers start to form. A pinge of panic sets in. Obviously you can't share crazy with just anyone, it has to be another self-identified crazy person. And that same person that called you crazy gives you support then takes it away suddenly to see if your marriage will fail because you are crazy and your normal husband cant handle/help you. I dont know where I'm getting with this. I felt hurt.
Anyone want/need to rant about being labeled insane? What is your story?
I've been in therapy for 5 years. Also medicated. I have a good job. I have a supportive husband. I have a home. But years of abuse and insanity still get the better of me sometimes and I feel like I don't deserve anything good, or that people will "find out" that I am a horrible person (I have bad elements and good), and I still have days/weeks. when I am extremely self destructive. The current incarnation is that (a) I am fighting dwindling self consciousnes and social awkwardness, - all part of myregular repertoire - but now (b) for no reason whatsoever I am fighting against the development of an eating disorder, which is a new development in my crazy. I am in my late forties. WTH, brain? WHY? Why do I do this to myself?