Jump to content


Do I need a new therapist?

Recommended Posts

I saw my tdoc for the first time in a long time but I've started to notice things about her that I hadn't before.... For instance, she said she'd get some paperwork and explain it to me, but she never did. And she focuses a LOT on my diagnosis rather than my symptoms. When I expressed that I was concerned that I had Borderline Personality Disorder, she shot that down without a blink but her only explanation was that "BPD is usually caused by abuse or neglect" which I know isn't exactly true, is it? Besides, I'm starting to wonder if I'm not repressing some past abuse/neglect myself, or maybe have not just processed it fully. It scares me and I don't know how she'd respond if I brought it up. She said, "You sound manic" or something and I did NOT sound manic I sounded confused and maybe quasi-psychotic and paranoid. 

i don't know. What are your red flags with tdocs? What would make you run in the opposite direction? 


edit:// Oh, I forgot to add, it doesn't feel like we get anything /done/, you know? Like we just talk. And she makes me feel better about my worries (not my paranoia tho, I spent the whole session believing that she could read my mind) but what's the point of therapy if we don't accomplish anything? -_-

Edited by saoirse

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

I think the first step is to raise your concerns directly with her - perhaps start with the stuff in your edit? I find it easiest to bring stuff like that in on paper and have my tdoc read it (while I fidget anxiously, stare at her shoes, and so on :P ).

Based on how she responds you’ll know, I think. I would expect her to ask questions about what you want to get from therapy, but hopefully she’ll also want to make changes or help you see how you’ve been progressing and stuff. Basically, you want her to be the opposite of defensive :) 

Sometimes my sessions feel like we don’t do anything- no deep work, no tears, and I feel worse or no better for them... but those are about strengthening the relationship. Can’t do it all the time though.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Similar Content

    • By Chiaroscuro
      This is how I feel at the moment!!! I hate cycling down into depression!!

      Today my Overeaters Anonymous (OA) Sponsor asked me a really interesting question: "Don't you plan anything fun??"

      It got me thinking. She wasn't asking it out of rudeness, she really meant it to be nice & so now I'm thinking, do I plan anything fun??

      Since X is still home with his rash (it's looking heaps better, but being that it's in such an intimate area, I'd rather keep him home til Monday & give it a chance to clear up completely), I asked him what he'd like to do today that's fun but doesn't cost any money/ uses what we already have -as we have no spare money-. He's still thinking about it

      I figured if the weather is nice again today, X & I will go for a walk around the block -X can ride his bike if it doesn't cause him discomfort-.

      There's also a new exhibit at the Art Gallery, so X & I will go & see that today -you can get into there for free-.

      I'm also going to call in & chat to my across-the-road-neighbour that I'm good friends with & X won't get bored as there's a high chance there's one of her kids at home.


      My anxiety's up again, which tends to happen when I spiral down into depression. It's frustrating, but not super bad at the moment.

      I'm hoping that cleaning the house (I don't like to do it, but I feel better when the house is all clean) will help me to feel better.

      I've just had a phone call from another friend whose partner's up in hosp after having an accident with a grinder & his wrist.

      I hope he's ok. I've got to go & babysit her kids so she can go up & see him. Her sister's coming up to relieve me.

      I'll let you know how he goes

      I hope everyone's keeping safe & well

      Warm regards