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About gizmo

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    Tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it.

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    Bipolar Land

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  1. This is such an important topic that I've literally made myself so paralyzed with anxiety and panic that I came out of my CB retirement just to get y'alls valued opinions: i was in a real bad place a month ago and did a couple of things I promised my family and my pdoc I would never do again. I think we all know what those things might be. I Made it in to see my pdoc the next day and felt full of shame and remorse. I asked my pdoc to please not admit me to the phospital because hospitals (and Foley catheters) are no 1 on my paralyzing fear list and he agreed. So then he wanted to see me b
  2. I have had two consultative pdoc visits from ssa. One for my initial app, and one for my CDR. I didn't think either of them went particularly well. The first one acted like he couldn't believe I had such memory lapses on the cognitive test, and the second barely asked me anything about my BP symptoms, diagnosis, or meds. But they take your medical records more seriously than the CE. So if you have good documentation (and it sounds like you do) then you should be fine. Have you thought about giving the SSA a letter from your pdoc outlining your treatment and why they believe you cannot wo
  3. When I first applied, I wasn't working. That was in 2008, and I was approved on my first try. During my continuing disability review three years later, I was attending college part-time. It took the SSA 14 months to render an approval on my CDR, and I believe college had a lot to do with that. From what a lawyer I consulted with told me, the ssa looks at how many hours a week you would spend in school and doing homework. If its equal to a full time job in the number of hours, then you might run into some problems because then you might be considered functioning at a high enough level to wor
  4. Well, after 18 months of numbness in my fingers and almost a year of progressively worsening back pain, I finally got a cervical and thoracic MRI this week. The results showed a bulging disc at C5-C6. So now we know what the problem has been. I go see the ortho for a follow up appt. next week, and I'm a bit discouraged by my treatment options. I want PT, but I can't afford to go three times a week like my cousin the doctor in PT told me last night is what is usually done. I've tried Celebrex and lyrica, and neither worked. My primary care dr. prescribed me 7.5/325 lortab, and two will work
  5. Hi crtclms! I've been thinking of you and wondering how your head has been treating you. Have you moved yet?
  6. I don't carry a kit per say, because I don't leave the house much. But I can't take triptans (they make my head feel like it's going to explode), so I get the following: botox shots every three months, fioricet, and stadol nasal spray. I use the fioricet first, and if it doesn't work after two doses one hour apart, I take the stadol. The stadol is extremely effective in stopping my migraines, but it renders me unable to open my eyes (it's a pretty potent opiod) and goofs me up almost worst than morphine. but since I've been prescribed it about 6 months ago, I haven't had to go to urgent ca
  7. But not for forever! But over the past three months, I've felt a distinct difference in my real life and when I tried to connect on CB. I don't know any of the new members or their stories, I feel mentally disconnected from the site, and I just don't feel like my responses were timely or helpful anymore. There is one other thing that is motivating me to take a step back: I have found that I have less mood episodes when I'm not immersed in thinking about mental health issues all day. It's not just CB, I've cancelled the MI-related newsletters I get as well. I'm not completely stable, and
  8. How do you remove someone from your newsfeed? I desperately want to do that with someone in the family I can't unfriend, but I can't figure out how to do it!
  9. How do you remove someone from your newsfeed? I desperately want to do that with someone in the family I can't unfriend, but I can't figure out how to do it!
  10. Until I was dx'd and started meds, I read 2-3 books a week and hardly watched tv. Then as my brain deteriorated it became harder and harder to read, so I turned to TV as a substitute. Now that I take vyvanse, I have periods in which I can focus and read, but I spend those periods on my college textbooks. When I'm not doing that, I watch tv. I have my own DVR that is currently 97% filled with shows I record that I need to watch.
  11. I have a MIL that "worries" excessively over everything. Hubby and I have to edit what we tell her. It sucks sometimes. That being said, I think it's actually a good thing she feels comfortable in sharing her concerns with you directly rather than gossiping the information to others instead. That's what happens to me, and I wish I could tell her to just say it to me, not SIL! Also, sometimes worriers don't know how to best talk to you about something they genuinely like to help you with. Maybe that's the case here. As the mother of a 15 yo that sees the dermatologist every month for
  12. After one office visit and two failed medications, my rheumatologist says that he can't help me any more. I was having some pain relief on the lyrica (about 50% at night) but I was full-fledged, emptying my bladder 1-3 times per week on it on all the doses I took (75 mg 1x, 2x, and 150 2x daily). I couldn't control it and had no warning when it would happen. I put up with it happening in school, at home, and at the grocery store, but when it ruined my very special dinner out, I contacted the dr. He only relayed messages through the nurse, and declined when I made the appointment. He first told
  13. I'm BP, but I have almost enough personality traits to put me in the BPD group as well. Today I went to my therapist, and saw they were starting a biweekly DBT group up on May 1st. I have to meet with the coordinator on the 30th to see if I'd be a good fit for the program. I'm excited and nervous. I've read lots of positive things about DBT and how it can help people like me who try to do something stupid when they are upset. And I've read positive studies on using DBT with BP patients to great success. The one bad problem is the copays. It's $15 per session after insurance, and there ar
  14. I once tried to get through to my pdoc. I told the receptionist that I needed to talk to him urgently because I felt like doing something dangerous to myself and I did NOT want to. Next thing I know, two police cars with their lights flashing pull up at the elementary school where I am picking up my daughter and they escort me to the police car, handcuff me, and call for an ambulance. All in front of about 600 kids, parents, and teachers. My daughter was scared and crying and didn't know what to. They loaded me in the ambulance and thankfully one of the EMTs let me use a phone to call my hubby
  15. I think the best thing to do is have an honest conversation with your dr. about what you are looking for. Only your doctor knows your symptoms in enough detail to figure out what and if a low cost medication will work for you. Going in with a preset list is a bad idea, because you are not a psychiatrist, and you can't insert your Internet browsing and user-story documentation in place of medicine school. If you are in the US, almost every drug manufactured (the brand name ones, anyway) have patient assistance programs. I go to pparx.org to see what plans cover the meds I take. Application i
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