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  1. I'm back from traveling to see my father and feel like my head is jumbled. Everything went well, even my small girl on sixteen hours of plane each way. But we discussed my mum whilst there and I know I have shit to work through and I just don't know whether it's worthwhile in a way. Does her death affect me still? I was hospitalized last month and my small girl visited me there on my birthday. Am I part of a repeating cycle?
  2. In my experience therapy is for processing things, which resurfacing/reexamining can be as painful as the original event(s). Condolences on your loss. My best friend died similarly over seven years ago and I still find myself overcome with grief at times. It will likely take you significant time to process his death and his life and how you feel about everything. Try to be patient with yourself. xx
  3. Agree with zyprexa, suggest dissolvables as less likely to produce weight gain. Also agree with haldol suggestion. I've had numerous haldol injections for acute episodes and they mix it with cogentin and maybe Ativan, those shots have cut my hospital length of stays in half. But that's if you really need to get a handle on something maybe.
  4. Aghast at the American government. So discouraged by basically everything but especially this detention ICE situation. It is and has long been outrageous and horrifying what's happening.
  5. I would ask about taking 5 or even the 2.5 mg ones (unknown if you're using the dissolvables, but I think the lowest they go is five). Seriously, if you typically are super sensitive to meds, I think you need an adjustment ASAP. Im not super sensitive to antipsychotics and even I titrate up. What steos can you take to get some more immediate relief? I would call the nurse again. And over and over.
  6. Only read your opening post but what're you trying to treat? I habe schizophrenua so you may be different, but I notice you don't have any typicals/first generation antipsychotics on your list. They are more likely to cause movement issues and I always take them with either propranolol, cogentin, or artane, but if you don't want to go the clozapine route, I have had much success with loxipine, navane, stelazine, haldol depot, and prolixin depot at various points in my life. Thorazine even worked for a while before I maxed out on it. Best of luck with whatever route you choose. PS I'm currently on clozaril and zyprexa. Among other things.
  7. I can't speak to mania as I have schizophrenia and not an affective disorder, but I agree with iceberg that's a higher dose to start than I would've expected for someone with no history of taking zyprexa. Apart from side effects, is it helping your mania? i would be in touch with psychiatrist or psych nurse and let someone know. It may be too much too fast and you'd eventually find the side effects subside, but it sounds to me like you need a dosage adjustment. Are you taking it at night to minimize daytime sluggishness?
  8. I have some anxiety about IOP. I have to speak with the psychiatrist to get my meds refilled as they only gave me a fourteen day supply at discharge from IP and that means I'll run out Friday. The IOP psychiatrist is hard to get a read on. She has no facial expressions.
  9. I got pregnant naturally at forty (but of a surprise actually) and gave birth to a healthy small girl at forty (then turned forty-one a couple of months later) i have read that there's a hereditary component and if women in your family conceive and successfully deliver late in life, you are more likely to be able. This is very true in my family.
  10. Yes, I have. Did you check the links in that blog entry? I need to look over it some more and I'm talking with my psychiatrist on Wednesday to get his input. I want to do more digging before I post that but there definitely appears to be more women with mood disorders getting ppp, but I'm unsure the risk of ppp for the average women with a mood disorder I hope that made sense I'm just now waking up so tell me if it didn't If you a source you could share I'd love to look it over and include it. Cheers!
  11. yes to all of this! exactly....exactly the problem... i fear them and they fear me and i fear for them and they fear for me...but nobody can just have a conversation instead of being overwhelmed... my small girl is awake, but i wanted to read and comment quickly. talk soon xx
  12. I take clozaril now and I would definitely get some sound medical advice before switching to it with the intention of getting pregnant.
  13. I write a blog entry on postpartum disorders and found information on postpartum ptsd. It's some that affects 9% of women so you're totally not alone. Here's the entry: I hope it helps xx
  14. Nervous. Lots of anxiety about seeing in laws so soon after a hospitalization. It's only 8:00 AM so abut early to start the PRNs but my morning Ativan isn't chipping away at this at all.
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