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About Octopuppy

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    North England
  • Interests
    Cats, clowns, clouds.

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  1. Thank you for your replies. Yeah, I am definitely minimizing it, but ultimately if it affected me, it affected me and I need to deal with it.
  2. So I was talking with my therapist this week, and she'd read a hospital report of where I'd had a dissociative episode whilst visiting my brother last week. She explained that it pretty much only comes from trauma, and I know what the trigger was and why it happened, I just never considered the particular event traumatic. I mean, that trigger has given me flashbacks before and other symptoms, but I just didn't think it was y'know... that bad? What happened was scary but I'm easily scared so it seemed normalish? Tdoc wants me to do trauma work when I've finished my DBT but two things come
  3. Since I told my doctor about the voices, one is constantly saying, "You're lying, you don't hear voices, you're making it up. You're not sick, you're pathetic." The irony is not lost on me.

  4. Can anyone tell me how quetiapine affects imagination and creativity? I've read the PIL, but there wasn't anything of note. I've always had a hyper imagination, and what's been happening is just like my ideas and thoughts being too bright and loud to stay inside my head, and if I take this med, I won't be able to imagine a bean. I'm an artist by living, so it's a bit important. All input appreciated, thank you.
  5. There was a ten-year old version of myself appearing everywhere. When we were alone at night, it kept saying, "You killed me."
  6. Several months ago (I'm not totally sure when, I wasn't told, my reports just changed) I got rediagnosed from depression and anxiety to disthymia. Pdoc doesn't want to prescribe anything for 'low mood' and tdoc is currently on sick leave and there's not the staff to pick up her appts. My mood had dropped significantly in the few sessions before she left, and switched between crying and being too sick of my own voice to say anything. It all seemed too unimportant to talk about anyway, so trying to open up got difficult. The last time I saw her we talked briefly about going back on medication. M
  7. Hi all. So, for a quick bit of current background, if I have certain additives, primarily certain food colourings, I get an assortment of hallucinations, delusions, mixed manic episodes, and dissociation (depending on what I've had, how much and how I'm feeling). The hallucinations tend to be the worst and most common side effect. They're normally manageable and quite mild when I'm not at my best, but they rocket if I've accidentally eaten the wrong thing. I sometimes ate them as a teenager on purpose to basically get high/tripped out, but the content of the hallucinations have gotten a lot wo
  8. Octopuppy! Miss you, from chemmybat

    1. Octopuppy


      I haven't been on CB in ages!

  9. Tentatively tentacled.

  10. I had a terribly lazy week last week. I have to make sure I get plenty done this week.

  11. Somewhere in my broken-glasses-hissy-fit I cut up my cash card and I need it -___- My dad has his glasses made up abroad, when he goes on business and it's very cheap. I've seen some frames i like for £30 and when he goes next month, and he can get the lenses put in then, so that's good. I'm thinking I might ask if they can call it my Christmas present or something. Two months early ¬¬ It's so embarrassing to have to approach people, even parents, to ask to borrow money. I feel incapable of managing my own finances. : For the meantime, I've glued/taped them together, which looks real sh
  12. I don't know about you, but I have two weeks of housework that needs to be done. I've been doing it in little half hours, two maybe three a day. I've been rewarding myself for good work. I've been understanding that I can't do more. But, the problem arises when there's two weeks of housework that needs to be done. Half hour slots mean it's building up faster than it's getting done. And the family is starting to get annoyed. I'm paid to do the housework, then not doing it. The What Helps thread lifts the mood and makes me feel less like offing myself, but for motivating myself to do the t
  13. I'm thinking I might call for that emergency appointment the lady at the pdoc office told me about. My mum told me yesterday I had smiled once in the past week. Whatever I lost when I broke my glasses hasn't come back. I'm feeling real bad. I can't afford my eye test tomorrow. I haven't got a penny to my name right now and I can't claim any low-income funding for another month. I'm gonna have to ask parents for money, which I hate. And then there's buying glasses... I'm gonna have a scout around and see if I can find some real discount place.
  14. I'm on a list to be treated for BPD, and I'm not sure I have it either. When I look up the checklist of symptom type thing, it all seems like extremes. Frantic fear of abandoment. No solid sense of self. Yeah, I don't really want people to leave me. Yeah, I'm a bit shaky in myself sometimes. I dissociate quite badly sometimes, but BDP sounds a lot worse that what I have. But then, if this therapy is going to make me feel better then I don't care what they call it. Maybe you should go with it for a bit, see what the treatment options are and see if they fit you. I've heard that the therapie
  15. Went to the optician this morning, they can't be repaired. They were pretty old too, so I kinda needed to get an eye test and stronger ones anyway. I might see if I can get contacts or something maybe. I can't drive without them either. I should be able to get a pretty cheap set though.
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