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Kaona

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    25
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About Kaona

  • Rank
    Apparently I'm still under construction.

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  • Website URL
    http://strange-dichotomy-of-emotions.tumblr.com

Profile Information

  • Gender
    female
  • Location
    Ontario, Canada
  • Interests
    Reading, writing, fashion, scrapbooking, pets, photography, researching random things.

Recent Profile Visitors

513 profile views
  1. I agree with you there. I'm still confused and my mind is swimming, but from what I have read of it so far, it fits well and makes sense of why I always seemed to find the Social Anxiety Disorder therapy and group therapies so hard, and not effective enough... They were having me do things that were MUCH higher on the anxiety scale for me compared to others in the groups, and at the time I couldn't understand why things that were like a 5 out of 100 on the anxiety scale for most were more like 50 out of 100 for me!
  2. Hey everyone. I just got diagnosed with Avoidant Personality Disorder this morning. The psych said that due to the severity and long standing length of my symptoms, it fits much more accurately than Social Anxiety Disorder (something I was diagnosed with 15 years ago). So, he took the Social Anxiety DX off and added the Avoidant Personality Disorder. I'm trying to find out as much accurate info as possible about it to gain a better understanding, and to figure out how to move forward with this. I have been Googling, but the amount of info is overwhelming. And I also want to make sure I'm getting all accurate info. Any links you know of that pertain to this, or even if you have a personal account of living with it and how it impacts you, would be so greatly appreciated. Thanks so much for reading this ❤️
  3. Just curious if anyone else is on Lamotrigine for mood swings from Borderline Personality disorder, and if so, what dosage you're taking? I'm currently on 125 mg and my psych thinks she wants to up me to 150 mg soon.
  4. Zoloft 300 mg- Depression, social anxiety disorder and PTSD Wellbutrin 150 mg- Depression and ADHD Klonopin 2 mg- Panic Disorder Lamotrigine 125 mg - Mood swings related to Borderline Personality disorder Latuda 20 mg- Psychosis from Borderline Personality Disorder, also to treat anxiety a bit.
  5. My cocktail of meds works a bit, but not nearly well enough. I have been thinking for a while now about looking into getting on a mood stabilizer. I have Borderline Personality Disorder (yes, I've done DBT... a year and a half of it) and still struggle immensely with my moods throughout the day. Basically, despite the 2 antidepressants I'm on, I'm still depressed and the depression goes from moderate to severe, then up to moderate, then down to severe again numerous times a day. The 2 antidepressants I'm taking do help in a way with my depression, because before my depression was severe and would get even more severe throughout the day, and then go to 'just' severe again, then down some more. But obviously the current moderate depression to severe depression and back up and down numerous times a day isn't enjoyable. I've lost all hope of ever being cured of depression, since I've been struggling with it for 13 years now, and have been on many different meds for it (plus lots of therapy) for 9 years. I'm just trying to keep an open mind with meds, because I do believe that I can still improve more... just not that it will ever be cured. I have dysthymia, which is a form of depression (for those of you who don't know, dysthymia differs from major depressive disorder in this way: major depressive disorder is more severe but doesn't last as long, whereas dysthymia lasts much longer but is less severe)... so that's what the 2 antidepressants I'm already taking are for. But the... for lack of a better term, depressed mood swings (aka the depression going from moderate to severe and back again many times a day), that's what I'm considering mood stabilizers for. It's exhausting to keep up with the mood swings (as if depression isn't exhausting enough, right?). I'm pretty much an expert on the emotion regulation module from DBT at this point, and unfortunately it hasn't been enough to make my moods much more level. Oh and my apologies for the length of this post but I figured more details are better than less in order to get the best input back. I've been researching mood stabilizers, but some of them seem to either increase anxiety, or decrease the effectiveness of 'the pill', which I am on. Going off of the pill isn't an option for me for a few different reasons, nor is using birth control other than the pill. And I have severe anxiety disorders, so if possible, I would like to avoid meds that will increase my anxiety. Does anyone know of anything that can help me, and that can be taken still while on 'the pill', AND preferably not increase my anxiety? I will deal with increased anxiety if I have to because a substitute to the pill isn't an option for me. I want to make an appointment with my GP soon and am hoping to have a mood stabilizer in mind that I can bring up the possibility of being prescribed. Thanks so much in advance for any input you guys can give me!
  6. Zoloft 200 mg- Depression and social anxiety disorder Wellbutrin 150 mg- Depression because the Zoloft only helps my social anxiety disorder and not the depression. Also the Wellbutrin is prescribed for me for social anxiety disorder and ADHD, since both Concerta and Ritalin upped my anxiety like crazy. Clonazepam (Klonopin) 0.5 mg 2x daily as needed (and trust me, it's needed!)- Panic disorder
  7. Yeah, the doctor thing isn't really an option because he's only in to the clinic I go to half a day once a week. And since I know what caused it and I'm aware that I accidentally took too much, there's really no point trying to get an appointment over it anyway. Although when I take the 54 mgs that is prescribed to me, if it still makes me like this I'll definitely try to make an appointment. As for now, I'm due for my next dose of Klonopin, so I'm hoping that will help. The panic is still here but less intense, still unpleasant but at least not as bad as earlier! Thanks for your input guys!
  8. Hey all. I'll try to make this to the point to the best of my ability, but I'm sort of in a state of distress right now. Basically, I was on 36 mgs of Concerta a day and was switched up to 54 mgs a day on Friday. Unfortunately I had been keeping the Concerta in one of those pill organizers, and for some reason assumed the next dose up was double of what I had been prescribed. So I didn't actually realize I was on 36 mgs until a few minutes ago, I came across some papers from my pharmacy and realized. I had been taking two 36 mg capsules (yesterday and today) thinking it was the correct dose, because since I had a few left over, I figured I might as well use them first before opening the bottle with the 54 mg capsules. So I've been taking 18 mgs extra a day for two days without realizing until now. I have multiple anxiety disorders, and basically yesterday and today, I have been having panic attacks for 99% of each day, also having lots of trouble focusing (but that I can cope with). Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can get through the rest of the day until tomorrow when I can take what I now know is the proper dosage? The panic and anxiety is just awful and I can't really function. I hope it was okay that I posted this here, wasn't sure if I should post it here or in the anxiety forums! Thanks for any input in advance!
  9. Hey all. So, I've been very depressed for about a month now. I'm no stranger to being depressed by any means, but it's rare for me to feel so deeply depressed for this long without at least a short break in between (meaning that sometimes it lifts/is a little less severe for a little while and then goes back). I have absolutely no energy, no motivation and barely care about anything anymore. Anyway, I'll just stop ranting about my symptoms because they're sort of beside the point. i explained this and more in detail to my clinician (she's a psychiatric nurse) and she said it's actually called a major depressive episode. I tried to find out some things online but really only got a list of symptoms. Basically, I'm wondering if you or anyone you know has been through a major depressive episode and if there was anything other than meds that helped. I just see no end in sight to it at this point and I don't know what to do, so sorry if this is a stupid question that there's really no answer to. Any input would be greatly appreciated though!
  10. When I'm happy, I feel like I'm lying to myself and everyone around me. I used to feel legitimate happiness but I find that I rarely do anymore. I apologize for having such a depressing answer... lol.
  11. Thank you all for your input. Unfortunately, I am unable to do OA because I have such high anxiety (to be honest, I am usually bordering on being housebound). Even getting to once weekly individual sessions and once weekly groups for DBT requires a lot of effort and encouragement, and that's with a worker that has a decent understanding of how horrible my anxiety is. So unfortunately, I feel that OA is not an option for me at this point.
  12. Hey guys. I've suspected that I've had compulsive overeating disorder for years and after looking over the criteria yet again, I have all of the symptoms. I am very overweight because of it and it effects my mood and energy level terribly. I'm very frustrated and disheartened because it took all I had to admit my eating issues to my worker. She is concerned and wants to track my eating behaviours and said we'll look at it in therapy. I see her for DBT and she said that DBT may be able to help with it, which I agree with, but I honestly feel that it won't be enough. I have struggled with it for more than ten years and it effects my quality of life greatly. She even told me I should look into something for eating disorders, but that's all she said... I've looked everywhere online for help and found nothing, and I even sucked it up and gathered all the courage I had and tried to talk to a few other people about it. They weren't too concerned. I don't like to worry people or anything, but I really do feel that it's severe so I don't understand why no one is listening to me other than my worker, and she isn't listening enough. I even mentioned it to my family doctor and explained, but he sent me to a weight loss clinic, which is absolutely not the type of help I need. I guess I'm just wondering if anyone has any ideas as to how I can make people understand better and realize that I absolutely need help for it... or if anyone has any links in regards to treatment, that would be great too (I've tried SomethingFishy and nothing their treatment finder listed is in my area). Sorry for such an emotional post, I'm just so upset and overwhelmed by this... thanks in advance for any replies.
  13. Oh my, this site is too much! I have a bit of a Japan obsession (understatement?)... so yeah, this totally appealed to me since I'm obsessed with their culture, music, etc. Have you seen the Ponponpon video? It's so random and it's frigging hilarious!
  14. HAHA awesome site! It reminds me of Smartphowned. Thanks for the link, the site has cheered me up a little.
  15. I had to giggle a bit because where it said to list any mental health issues you've been diagnosed with and I tried to list mine, it wouldn't let me list them all because it was too long (if you're curious, it's just the same ones that are in my signature haha, that's all I'm diagnosed with). Anyway...my score was 139.
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