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About TheEastCoast757

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  1. Didn't forget about this. Sadly I haven't made a positive change as of yet. Disappointing and mostly hopeless about it.
  2. I could care less about sex also. Sucks for my boyfriend but luckily I know he truly loves me. You just have to attempt to find a way to compromise. Hopefully your husband is as understanding as my boyfriend. Oh yeah I would totally use another word besides rape. I don't think rape should be used as lightly.
  3. Oh and the only reason I'm turned off by NA is because when they told me about it I was like do I have to talk? And the lady was like yeah that's the point. The intensive therapy would cost me like $40 a week for 12 weeks and I don't have a job. They told me if I can support my habit I can pay for therapy but I don't see it like that.
  4. I've tried taking to people before and it never works out. I go a couple times and just randomly stop. I'm going to make an effort to find a therapist and stick with them. I guess I need to stop being silly and just try an open meeting. Hopefully I can be about it instead of just talking about it. It's just hard to even imagine giving up my smoking routine. It's like I have a desire inside to really stop but it seems like such an unreachable goal right now. It's mainly just the way I act when I don't have my smoke. That's what is so hard to control.
  5. My main fears are something happening to my grandparents and the end of the world. Not just me dying but everyone getting wiped out at once. These have been huge fears for so long. Hard to go a day without thinking about the shit : \
  6. I did. I'm glad I was honest but I kind of regret it because they won't prescribe me anxiety medicine that actually works so I just keep smoking. Endless cycle.
  7. I was on Xanax for anxiety but once I started using these income based services (I'm unemployed) they don't prescribe benzos so they have me on Zoloft AND Celexa. I don't understand that. My pharmacist told me not to take both so I've been scared to take them together. Some of my friends smoke some don't regardless of smoking they are good people and I feel I've already cut enough people out of my life. I get your point though. Just seems so hard to do. I've really been considering hitting up an NA meeting just don't want to feel judged and I know I'm going to have mad anxiety talking in front of people I don't know. I hate that.
  8. Ok so I smoke everyday 2-3 times a day. I've been labeled as cannabis dependent and was recommended to go to intensive outpatient therapy and NA meetings. Here are my problems: Honestly deep down I think there is nothing wrong with pot it helps me with my anxiety but I think I'm over doing it. I'm ashamed to go to NA, to be in there with people with harder addictions and I'm only here for weed. I think the biggest part of my habit is the routine, I just wish I could stop on my own but I've tried and it's hard. My attitude just gets stank and I'm not fun to be around. I get really depressed if I don't have weed and always have to buy more before I run out. Just the idea of having it gets me by.
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