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    In your neck of the woods.
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    I love Ministry. I have a passion to do the will of God. There is nothing in this world that can fill that hunger....I'm going back to school and I'm not making any excuses.....I love my cat's. Yes I am a cat man......

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  1. I was noticing my depression getting worse and thinking about suicidal thoughts. Well went into a early appointment and the doc upped my Latuda from 60 to 80 but I’m noticing pain all over. Is this normal? She said it could be a side effect. If it is I don’t want to up it
  2. In 2017 I was yanked off so many meds all at once. I do consider it my fault because I was abusing Lyrica. Well for three years I suffered. After leaving to Oklahoma I found a doc that would prescribe it again and klonopin. Well I have my fiancé dol it out to me so I’m not tempted to abuse it. I get prescribe 75, 3 a day. And 1mg of klonopin. I usually take only .5 of klonopin out of fear I’ll go through that Hell I went through it 2017. does anyone else get a mood lift from Lyrica?? I mean technically I don’t need it for pain and my doc said I can double dose if need be, but it profoundly helps anxiety and not breakthrough anxiety, just that free floating anxiety. I would say it’s a mood stabilizer because if I don’t have it I get very depressed, almost like the reverse of someone else too where it knocks them out. My pdoc plans to build a dispensary for weed when it becomes completely legal here in VA, but I’m so scared to smoke or take marijuana, I would love to be able to but my fear is it’ll throw me into a panic attack. Anyways can anyone give their opinions on Lyrica
  3. It’s been awhile huh? anyway I was living in Oklahoma, I decided to take a giant leap of faith and moved to Virginia. I just had a baby boy. Have two excellent doctors that prescribe the meds I need. It’s incredible how far I have come. anyways just dropping by to say Hi!!
  4. I was forced CT klonopin seven years. Three mg a day. Had two grand mal seizures. Fired the docs after being psychotic for three months. Got back on it and weaned almost a year. Docs will not prescribe it to me for any reason. So I suffer w only gabapentin to take, ive almost got to the point of ending it all I can’t function.
  5. Guys from what I’m going thru I don’t think the Zyprexa is helping. Ive made many mistakes over the years. I’ve done things that have hurt myself and others. Right now now when I think about what I’ve gotten into I think that the cops I just trying to bust me. Even tho what I am doing is legal. I keep thinking that they are just trying to bust me. Its what haplened to me in 05. I started noticing coincidence and here I am today fearful I’m going to crack. I don’t want to lose it like I did in 05. I walked all around okc and I don’t want to go thru that again.
  6. Yes, meth, not methadone. Anyways I didn’t take anything that would yield a false positive. I think they just said that to see to see if I was abusing meth, cuz when u talked to them I told them my drug history. I was trying to be honest, I hate it when I’m honest cuz I always get myself in trouble. I didnt gave a problem taking the test the test and when they said I had meth in my system I just said fine do what you want.
  7. Ok, I ditched my doc. I was going to go through my PCP. I saw them them and they wanted a drug test, I complied. I didn’t have any thing to hide. I get called in to take another one. They told me the last one leaked on the way there. I gave them them another one. Today I was told meth was in my system both times. I havent done meth since 2015. So so I know they’re lying. So they told told me I have to see a psych doc instead because I failed two drug tests. I think they're just saying that so I get out of their hair.
  8. I don’t take benzos anymore. Was on klonopin 7 years. Valium and Xanax one year. Im thankful I got off of them and I’m out of the hard part. Im not bashing benzo last. They are really good as needed but everyday if you ever run into the problem I did be prepared to be in Dante’s Inferno!
  9. Ever since I change AP’s I’ve had a runny nose. I looked up zyprexa side effects and runny nose is one of them. Any one else have this side effect?
  10. It’s surprising w all the regulations that he is willing to let you stay on Valium. But, good thinking on your part, withdrawal is so bad on benzos.
  11. I can take lyrica and it smooths everything out. I take the free floating anxiety away. Im moving to Virginia. When I see the doc I’m going to tell them what works. I hope also they will have compassion when it comes to s benzo. My gf is going to dole out my meds. She’s my gatekeeper.
  12. The more I talk to my gf the more I feel we’re def soulmates. I waited twelve years and almost almost another two. I’m so thankful I waited.
  13. Guys I don’t know what’s happening to me. To everyone voice changing to not being able to see any hope in life. Ive never got to the point where I think about death but I’m in a place of fantizing about suicide. I look back at all that happened to me. My anxiety is so bad that I have this unrelenting depression. I keep laying in bed in bed thinking about death. Even as a Christian I don’t care. I’ve ran into too many doctors who only care about their license over the patient. I think even if I was given a benzo I wouldn’t care. My depression is so bad I see no hope in anything.
  14. There are many here who say a psychosis isn’t traumatic. Well look, while I was having this episode I was in jail. I was abandoned. I was severely beat up. I get out and think my ex was going to be eaten up at any moment. While in jail u was scared to leave my cell because I thought I was going to be raped. I thought cannibals and zombies where everywhere eating a chopping ppl up. Today i sometimes go into derealization where I think I’m back in that place. I start to think my roommates are just wanting to rape me. When i was yanked off of three mg of klonopin in TN I thought my dad was some demon waiting to rape me. When im under a lot of stress I notice my PTSD. Starts to go haywire. Folks i was in jail going thru what I thought was hell. I thought I had died and that was my punishment.
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