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sonicwhite

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Everything posted by sonicwhite

  1. Ok last nights dream I was standing beside this old man. I heard a pop like a gun and I look at him and he had shot himself in the head. I was was distraught and walked into this store and as I was walking I felt this burning pain in my back. I realized than I had been shot in the back. I kneel over and blood starts coming out of my mouth. Than an I realized I was about to die and all I could think about was my gf. I was than standing before God and He said let them come in. I wake ale up and I immediately think I’m dead. That me and Christina were in the kingdom of heaven. There was a great flow of energy throughout my body. As I was talking to her in text message I was saying I’m thankful to be with you. That God is using trump to build the first wall around the new Jerusalem and America is it’s heartbeat. That there will be three more walls put up. Not it by the same president but others. Than Jesus will come down and transform it into His kingdom. i know it’s sounds neat but it was so real to me.
  2. I’m doing pretty good through out the day. The nightmare triggered a derealization episode. Anxiety has has always been my triggers and klonopin is a very good bandaid but that’s it. Its not not meant for long term if that makes sense.
  3. Guys I was doing ok until I slept and had a terrible nightmare. i won’t go into the dream as it really doesn’t matter but I woke up and I was in derealization real bad. I texted my gf and told her I had a bad dream about us and I started to think ok we are in the kingdom of heaven. That Obama was the Anti Christ and we got through the tribulations and now it’s the 1000 year reign. That Trup is building the four walls of the Bew Kingdom of Heaven. i know sounds kinda neat but it’s rather pretty scary to me. Please someone help me.
  4. Haven’t been able to update my sig. im on Risperdal 4mg Remeron 45mg cymbalta 30mg Gabapentin 800 TID. Priloces 20mg Suboxone 16mg.
  5. Ok, when I had to cold turkey 3 mg of klonopin in TN I lost my mind. I was thinking I was dead and at Gods Judgment. Coincidence happening everywhere. I thought we were going to be nuked. I had a lot of psychotic symptoms because 3 mg for seven years is such a large dose. Well I’ll in order to get my Suboxone I have to be off klonopin and figuring that I would have to come off of it anyway I chose this route. So so here I am today fearing the worst. That I’ll go through all of that that I went thru in TN being traumatized because they stripped my meds from me without any hope.
  6. Thanks jt I’ve been doing so good when I moved out of my abusive relationship with my dad. I was getting sicker and sicker in TN. They will not help help you until you’re on your deathbed.
  7. Well I’ve been on suboxone for almost five months. In the beginning it gave a nice mood lift but it has a ceiling affect so eventually I just stopped craving opiates. The cymbalta tho is definitely helping me.
  8. Yes one dose. I have been off of SSRI SNRI for six months. I took my dose and it really grabbed me out of my thinking. 30 mg and I feel just fine. If it’s working this good I will continue to do it. I have to come off of klonopin. It’s just time to. And yes respiratory depression is what they fear. Also so I have only had really one other antidepressant work and that was Zoloft.
  9. I have a huge relief in depression. This ain’t placebo folks. I really feel happy.
  10. First dose and I feel somewhat a mood lift. Don’t know if it’s just my hopes but I’m watching TV in my room for the first time since I’ve been here in Oklahoma.
  11. Ok while I saw the doc they said I have to come off the klonopin in order to get suboxone. So they prescribed cymbalta for the anxiety anxiety but I was on Effexor and it didn’t do jack. So anyone one have any success with Cymbalta?
  12. I have been on suboxone for like four months. I have tried several SSRI SNRI before with hardly any avail. I also have gbabapentin which I'm just now started to stop thinking about wanting to abuse it even the instill get tempted. Anyways I have a intermittent opiate addiction for ten years but when I returned to Oklahoma in July I was abusing hydro codons everyday. In I think October I went to see a sub doc. At first the drug was too strong. Then I got used to it and needed the 16 mg of it originally prescribed to me. I notice ice a mood lift from it about 45 minutes after I dose. I'm curious as to know if anyone else here has also experienced the same thing. I hardly thinking of abusing opiates anymore. That's because all my opiate receptors are saturated.
  13. I have been on suboxone for like four months. I have tried several SSRI SNRI before with hardly any avail. I also have gbabapentin which I'm just now started to stop thinking about wanting to abuse it even the instill get tempted. Anyways I have a intermittent opiate addiction for ten years but when I returned to Oklahoma in July I was abusing hydro codons everyday. In I think October I went to see a sub doc. At first the drug was too strong. Then I got used to it and needed the 16 mg of it originally prescribed to me. I notice ice a mood lift from it about 45 minutes after I dose. I'm curious as to know if anyone else here has also experienced the same thing. I hardly thinking of abusing opiates anymore. That's because all my opiate receptors are saturated.
  14. I started Suboxone about three months ago. At first I couldn’t handle the side effects. The headaches and cloudiness. Than over time I got used to it. I at first was prescribed two 8 mg film a day. At first I could only handle one film so I to,d them I didn’t need two. Wulp, I went in their office yesterday and told then that one film wasn’t doing it. They em were more than happy to give me two and said if we need to go higher just call me and we will. When i I got back from TN to Oklahoma I was abusing opiates like everyday. I couldn’t stop taking them. I had an uncontrollable urge to get high using Norco. I am thankful I found a doc because my life has been so much better since then. Is it safe to be on klonopin and Suboxone? I’m on .23 twice a day of klonopin so I think I’m fine. Anyways I need to update my sig so you guys can see the progress I’ve made in the last year.
  15. Ya sorry for that. I’m not abusing anymeds. I was gifted by a doc who had compassion on my anxiety. She doesn’t have a problem giving me klonopin. Now if it were Xanax than ya she would probably have a problem. The He thing isn’t a had a nocturnal seizure about five weeks ago. How I know is that I wet the bed and was kinda out of it. I straight told her that I wanted off this med but she said you’re going to fast on your taper. Anyways. She just wrote me a script and said she never let me run out. I’m thankful for this. From March to July I suffered the worst type of pain. Never again will I have the trust I used to have with doctors. Anyways I fired all my docs in Tennessee and moved back to Oklahoma. I’m trying to get my own place and then from there build me a nest egg. Im just thankful that’s all.
  16. Hello peeps. Well moved back to okie. I found a doc that reinstated my klonopin but I refused to go above .25 twice a day. I had two seizures as you all no in TN and when I got back to Oklahoma I had a Nocturnal seizure. I called my PCP and I said I don’t have any other option but to come off the one script I had of klonopin. She said what do you want me to do. I told her let’s just up the dreaded gabapentin and with a stern NO she was like it’s already at its max. She said why why don’t we continue the klonopin. I was like I only have two weeks left of .125 twice a day. She said I don’t have a problem giving it to you. She also made an appointment to see a neurologist. I was stunned. I was shunned by so many doctors in TN that I couldn’t believe she said that. Im thankful that here in Oklahoma you’re treated like a human. Wulp folks it’s nice to see y’all. I’m doing everything by the books.
  17. Ok, I've made up my mind. I'm not going to be ruled around by a drug. Right now I'm in a pocket of heaven. I see why it was so important to detox. I hope the days in the future will be swell.
  18. Ok, I've made up my mind. I'm not going to be ruled around by a drug. Right now I'm in a pocket of heaven. I see why it was so important to detox. I hope the days in the future will be swell.
  19. Ok, I've made up my mind. I'm not going to be ruled around by a drug. Right now I'm in a pocket of heaven. I see why it was so important to detox. I hope the days in the future will be swell.
  20. Got my Klonopin and I'm at .25 every day. I'm weaning the cold turkey was too much. They say that those who CT usually don't last.
  21. Has anyone used this for sleep. My doc prescribed this for anxiety but t didn't do anything for my anxiety. Just made me tired. So when I see the doc next Monday I'm going to ask if I can use it for sleep. Im hoping it works since I'm not allowed benzos or Ambien.
  22. Ok I had a seizure in April. Actually two. So I never went back to my doc to get a appt to see a brain doc. Actually my phone was turned off. So my dad said the first one lasted like four minutes. Then I had one in the ER and they have me Ativan. Okay so what happened the day I had them I took twenty two gabapentin trying to release and ease my benzos withdrawLs. My dad counted the pills and gave them to the emt that picked me up. I have no desire to abuse but at the same time I do. I fear I'll have another seizure because the docs say that benzos withdrawal in the first week is where you have a seizure. A nurse said it was because of the klonopin ct Turkey Should I go to a brain doc in case it might kill me
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