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Cerberus

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About Cerberus

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    The Abyssal Inn

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  1. If y'all have any faith left at this point, there's always this: Vengeance is Mine, saith The LORD. I will repay. Their foot shall slip in due time; For the day of their calamity is at hand, And the things to come hasten upon them. - Deuteronomy 32:35 Yes, their feet will slip, in due course... but I think a case could be made for a campaign of scattering banana peels about and upsetting containers full of marbles at the entrances of both No. 10 and the White House, as a public service.
  2. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    That ad is disturbing on multiple levels. First of all, while it is encouraging that they want to treat depression at its source, which they acknowledge is The Brain, the little circles suggest that they aren't entirely sure what part of the brain is responsible, and whether the problem is that there's something missing, or something there that shouldn't be. The little circles also suggest the results of target practice. Note at upper left of the brain a shape like a crescent moon angled toward the brain, quite plainly sucking up a blueish substance. What is this? Depressing thoughts? Cautiousness about spending money on dubious treatments? One's very soul? Note also that the treatment is "FDA-Cleared" as opposed to "FDA-Approved" - I suppose "clearance" is easier to obtain when you have a non-drug treatment, but they are careful to insert "Important Safety Info" in faded text at upper right, almost as if they weren't terribly keen on you actually seeing the Important Safety Info. Which makes one wonder what could be that unsafe about the moon sucking your soul out through your forehead. Should you elect to try this, however, be aware that, apparently, you have to set an appointment with your own medulla oblongata. Don't delay - I hear there's a waiting list.
  3. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    But really now... And if so, will you look cross-eyed? If you spank that particular cat, then you are an imbecile. Both of these are from the mobile version of the site. Also, notice the links listed: They both link back to us. They're ad-spamming us with our own content.
  4. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    This, this... parade of nonsequiturs: No accompanying text except the URL nearly hidden at the bottom to let one know that the ad is from some outfit calling itself 6dollarshirts. But imagine for a moment that you lacked that vital piece of information. What, then, would you make of this array? 1. A symbolic prophecy of the coming of our Robot Overlords? 2. A juvenile attempt at humor 3. A logo bizarrely suggestive of a latex clothier (never get into wearing latex - repairing it is a bear) 4. Either a snarky joke for atheists or a blasphemous provokation aimed at believers - I suppose it depends on the wearer's mood 5. A reference to the film The Fifth Element. For anyone who hasn't seen it, this would be baffling. 6. Annotated bicycle diagram. Six squares that have no relation to each other whatsoever. Or do they...? Could this be an Illuminati code?
  5. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    A shoe with an "aggressively grippy" sole: Speedgoat 4 GTX. Because nothing says athletic prowess and sexiness like our friend the swift and sure-footed... goat.
  6. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    Whilst reading this very thread: Eh? Is this some kind of unicycle-skateboard mutant? Having cleverly identified my impaired sense of balance following my 2014 stroke, this is clearly a triumph for the internet consumer-targeting AI. Wait a moment... strike that. Reverse it. Thank you. As a designer, I have to ask: If you're going to market a product called "OneWheel", why could you not resist putting two of them in the picture? I can count to two, and I see two wheels. Confusing message, that's all I'm saying. Of course without any sense of scale, these could be some kind of siege warfare constructions, a new type of high-capacity inner city bus, a modern answer to zeppelin airships, or perhaps starliners for multigenerational interstellar travel. I feel one wheel turning in my mind with the numerous possibili - no, it's stopped.
  7. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    In preparation for your cocooning, of course.
  8. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    Oh, for goodness' sake. Peyronie's is something that can develop from an injury or trauma to the corpus cavernosum, causing scar-like tissue to develop, which in turn causes the unnatual curavture. It can also make erection impossible in severe cases. There is no cure, but there are surgical interventions, and in minor cases, the issue can be treated relatively simply and the curvature reduced or eliminated altogether. The Internet may be your friend, but in this case I'm speaking from experience. Didn't have it, got it via an event I will not attempt to describe, treated it, not affected by it any more. No, it was not particularly painful except during the actual treatment. No, I will not go into detail. If you insist, you can just let your imaginations run wild, you minxes, you.
  9. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    Those were my precise initial thoughts, but in reverse order.
  10. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    As I have repeatedly told my children when they harangued me with questions, The Internet Is Your Friend. A quick search produced this on the subject of the BallPark Pouch: Thanks to its 3D construction, the BallPark Pouch™ is perfectly formed to fit your anatomy. You can think of it like a super-soft lockbox – it’ll keep your boys cozy and secure. Besides an obvious feel-good factor, the BallPark Pouch™ offers a number of unique benefits. For starters, everything stays put, and you won’t have to worry about physically positioning your boys into the pouch. Next up, the pouch's mesh panels create a permanent divide between your balls and your thighs. This means no more sticking, downright discomfort, or impromptu games of pocket pool. Lastly, the BallPark Pouch™ provides natural support and movement, meaning that no matter the maneuver, your boys will be good to go. So in essence it’s an athletic supporter with built-in chambers to sequester one’s man-parts. As a possessor of man-parts, I cannot imagine those being comfortable whilst in motion, and they are clearly not paying attention to the current trend toward “going commando”. And still this firm calling itself “Saxx” without acknowledging a shred of irony wishes to be taken seriously. I don’t think those are expressions of fear - they’re the models’ candid expressions of “You’re joking, right?”
  11. Cerberus

    Targeted ads on CB

    This thread is being targeted by inline meta-ads: "Answer a few short questions to get the best product recommendation for you." Of course, we're also getting: "Give the gift of UGG" so I wouldn't put too much faith in product recommendations...
  12. I'm afraid I have to at least partially debunk Nishigaki-san's theory - I have been falling into the hell voluntarily on a daily basis for years simply by virtue of waking up in the morning, and I'm no closer now to Goodbye-ing my Depression than I've ever been in the last 35 years. I've also had occasion to throw away my pride quite heedlessly, and been showered with insults both deserved and less so. What I have learned from all of this is that no amount of anal constriction, in the British mode or otherwise, is going to make any difference in my life beyond possibly resulting in constipation. Which brings us back, full circle, to falling voluntarily into the hell.
  13. “Caboo”? Really? Because you use it on your caboose? I’d like to complain about the way anyone selling anything seems to feel entitled to mangle perfectly good words and phrases just to try to stand out. I cringe every time I drive past the local Kountry Kitchen restaurant and shudder to think what’s in “all the fixens”. Whenever I see some local store advertising a special on “Ham” (with quotes), I wonder what they’re actually selling. Because quotation marks aren’t meant as attention-getters. ... As I sit here writing this, I find my mind careening from thought to outraged thought about the tawdriness of human society, and I realize that if I do not stop I am going to completely erase the minuscule benefit of my antidepressants.
  14. Today I was contemplating my grey cloud on a sunny day when it occurred to me that the current state of depression that I cope with - that is, the current level of treatment-resistant Double Depression treading water with my nose just above the suicidal ideation threshold - is what I consider my stable standard. And then I thought: When the hell did that happen? When did this state of abject misery become an acceptable, let alone desired, goal of any sort? The thought took me aback somewhat. I began to realize that I've been in the trenches fighting for so long that the "new normal" keeps getting worse and worse as time grinds on and the condition deteriorates, yet I become more numb to it. I do notice the creeping anhedonia - more and more things that once brought me some small moment of pleasure have disappeared. I make do without them because they are simply no longer available to me. I wonder what I will do when there aren't any more at all. I think, @water, I would hold this up as part of the answer to your original question - at what point have you lost too much of what makes life enjoyable? When has the depression stolen too much? I think that for a time one can maintain a balance in the struggle against it by pitting positive against negative, while one still has the positives to use. But for someone in my position, almost all the ammunition has been fired, the enemy is at the gate as powerful as ever, and there's only one charge left in the cannon. If rice pudding ever fails to tempt me, it's all over. Really.
  15. Hypothetically, indeed. Where do we draw the line? We talk a lot on CB about our personal experiences with various cocktails that have been prescribed for us, their dismal failures, their mediocre mehs, and occasionally, their successes. The great benefit of this sharing is to give each other ideas for new lines of discussion with our pdocs for new things to try when our cocktails aren't performing as desired, or to help us understand why we're suddenly having dizzy spells, seeing dancing bananas, or have forgotten what sex is. When the conversation treads over the line is when we start speculating about idiotic things to do, like take as many antidepressants as possible at once. You're not planning to do this yourself? Just curious about synergy? Mm-hm. Whatever. Let's talk for a second about serotonin syndrome. There is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Serotonin syndrome is a really good example, and when you're taking antidepressants, it's not that hard to achieve if you're doing absurd things like, oh I don't know, trying to take as many of them as you can at once to see if they synergize in your head. Stocking up too much serotonin (The second "S" in SSRI) can lead to: agitation, restlessness, confusion, rapid heart rate, high blood pressure, dilated pupils, loss of muscle coordination, muscle rigidity, heavy sweating, diarrhea (fun), headache, shivering, goosebumps, and even threaten your life with high fever, seizures, irregular heartbeat, and unconsciousness. How's that for some synergy? And that buproprion(Wellbutrin) that pdocs sometimes add to an SSRI? Even that can contribute to serotonin syndrome if the mix isn't right. So can the tricyclics and MAOIs. Oh, and your anti-migraine meds. And any opiate pain medication you might be taking. And lithium. Even those herbal supplements (like St. John's wart, ginseng and nutmeg, for God's sake) and OTC cough medicine can do it. And people who like to play fast and loose with their meds on their own (I have no idea whether you're one of these) sometimes also like to play fast and loose with things like MDMA, LSD, cocaine and amphetamines - which also play hell with serotonin. But let's take a larger view. Chemistry is tricky. In a lab, trying to get molecules to form into desired compounds requires precise measures, regulated temperatures, and exacting technique - special stirring, subtle shaking, timed dripping, ice baths at the right moment and so forth. Contrast this with an eight-year-old with a chemistry set throwing things into a glass jar to see if they explode. Mixing one's own meds cocktail to see how many antidepressants one can take until they synergize is an example of the second scenario. (*~BOOM~*, and a mess afterward) Can meds work together positively for better results? Of course they can. That's why our pdocs combine them. But the body and brain are a sloppy chemical stew, and even the best pharmacologists on the planet are only best-guessing about the full effects of these medications on our systems. Our care teams are challenged to administer what are often harsh chemicals to try to regulate poorly understood imbalances in our minds while doing us as little harm as possible. We don't assist that process by treating our brains like a beaker and doing our own ad-hoc chemistry. We do research. We share knowledge and experience. We consult with each other and then we take the information we gather and use it to ask informed questions to our pdocs because we are involved in, and advocates for, our own mental health. But at CB we don't speculate on woolly-headed ideas about DIY prescribing. Beware of wool. Where do we draw the line? 🔻 ______________________________________ Right there. Topic closed. Cerberus Moderator
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