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About Cerberus

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    The Abyssal Inn

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  1. One way to avoid this kind of uncertainty is to keep your meds in one of those boxes that has compartments for each day of he week. That way, if you can't recall whether you've taken your med for the day, you can just open that day's compartment and check.
  2. Wonka's chocolate factory was supposed to be in England, but he imported his labor force from abroad... just not from America. Some tropical place with Vermicious Knids. On the other hand, it feels like we're up to our armpits in Vermicious Knids these days...
  3. I blame mental illness for everything the Orange Imbecile does. Because he's dogbarking crazy.
  4. If you started Effexor because you wanted its effect on norepinephrine and now you're finding that it's not as effective any more, it may be that you need a higher dose. Effexor is actually a MRI, a multiple reuptake inhibitor, affecting serotonin, norpinephrine, and dopamine as the dosage increases. A dosage of 150mg is only the low end of the therapeutic range for norepinephrine; you could go as high as 300mg and see if you don't experience a resurgence of its positive results against your MDD. I do have to ask, however, whether you have the benefit of the care of a mental health specialist. You mention that you're asking your GP for these prescriptions, but deciding on a medication strategy to treat your personal flavor of MI should include the help of a psychiatrist who can properly assess your current state and make sure the meds regime you're on is chemically sound. If you haven't consulted a pdoc, I really would recommend it.
  5. I feel like an astronaut on a spacewalk whose tether has come loose and the space station is one inch out of reach.
  6. That, sir, is an affront to all of us on the Spectrum. I demand satisfaction. If you do not retract this vile slander, I will meet you in front of the Starbucks of your choice, for a duel of fisticuffs, with beverages to follow. Marquis of Queensbury rules, naturally.
  7. This is heartbreaking, because should the unspeakable/unthinkable happen and Trump be reelected in 2020, I had planned to seek asylum in Great Britain. Now it's going to have to be Norway or some other country where they eat bizarre things like fermented fish.
  8. Part of what made jt07 such an effective Moderator here on CB was that his experience, compassion, wisdom and imagination combined seemed to enable him to help the people he talked with anticipate a better life in the future than the one they experience in the present - he could make that step forward in hope, and bring us with him. Now he has made a step forward to the place where we all must go, every one of us, in time. That he has gone ahead, as usual, might give us some comfort, knowing that wherever he was, was a place we wanted to be. Do not mourn for him, free and whole and fulfilled; and only briefly for ourselves, for we were blessed with him, and carry his blessing still, and the challenge to share the example he set with one another.
  9. Sming - What you do when the suffering threatens to overwhelm you is find a way to place the suffering in context. Find an explanation or reason why the suffering must take place. The answer will be as varied as the individual sufferer. For instance, I believe that nothing in the Universe happens without a reason, even if I don’t or can’t comprehend that reason at the moment. I also believe that suffering shapes us as people, refining our character in the was a crucible refines ore. I suffer for a reason, and I can accept that. Perhaps you can discover your own rationale.
  10. Accepting that you have Depression is the same as giving a name to the thing that afflicts you. And to know the name of something is to have power over it. Acceptance allows you to focus your thought and energy on what is known about the problem, and to narrow your choice of actions down to those that are recognized to have a positive effect. If you don't accept your illness - if you vascillate about its nature and its causes - you scatter your mental and physical resources when you need them the most. Depression cannot be cured, but it can be treated, and some people achieve remission. Not everyone (35+ effervescent years of treatment-resistant depression suggest that I may not one of the lucky ones ) but even the most profoundly affected can find some relief of symptoms. Take the proverbial bull by its proverbial horns.
  11. Iceberg - You're looking at this from a sleep perspective, but for so many of us who struggle mightily at times to simply get out of our beds, the issue has nothing to do with sleep. It's a classic symptom of worsening depression. You list your Dx as BP1 - how are you doing in that regard? Are you in a depressed mode? If so, how are you coping? I would recommend that you take a few moments to sit down and honestly assess yourself, your mood states over the last couple of weeks, run down the lists of symptoms of depression in BP1 patients, and see how many of them apply to you at the moment. It could be that in the scramble of trying to keep up with school and whatnot, depression could have crept up on you without your really recognizing it. it's perfidious like that. It could be a sleep issue the way you're thinking, but it doesn't hurt to give your brain a holistic overview from time to time.
  12. It has been said that the difference between being miserable and not is having one nickel more than you need for your monthly bills. I can attest to this, to a degree. I have been on both sides of the equation. I have struggled financially, I have been stable financially, now I'm in dubious waters again. When the question of whether you have the financial resources for your necessities is constantly looming over your head, or at least never very far away, it is an unavoidable drag on mental health, and exacerbates any existing MI a person may be experiencing. This is a quite separate question from whether a person has sufficient funds for exceptional (or even adequate) mental health care. To this degree, at least, I would say that having enough money is always, always a benefit to mental health.
  13. All - This topic deals with life-and-death issues, and as such it naturally provokes strong opinions. The Moderating Team feels that the discussion has been a bit overheated, and that it may be in everyone's best interest for us to lock the thread, at least temporarily, to give everyone a chance to reflect, and to cool down. We will revisit it at a future date. Cerberus Moderator
  14. Non-daily check-in: I’ve been in bed for the better part of six days due to depression, ennui, and lack of raison d’être. As I have lain in bed, I have cogitated on the fact that my ability to have successful (read: non-hate-generating) communication with neurotypicals is getting worse instead of better. It seems that I must make a choice between actively stirring the emotions in my head to a screaming boil in order to try to commune with them, or find peace in a rational mind but get bricks through my window because I believe that feelings don’t equal facts. 😛
  15. Ahoy. I went to a meeting with the county judge executive over a troubling matter, and it went reasonably well. I managed eye contact throughout. My son visited in the evening and helped me with circuits. I just hope he didn't give me his sniffles. I bought the flea, tick, and assorted vermin repellent for the cat to the tune of $114 for a 6-month supply. I could have bought a new cat. I should say at the outset that there's no way I'll be able to reply to this daily. I've always been shite at journalling. But I'll try to remember to stop by.
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