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  1. I was initially diagnosed with MDD back when I was 13-ish. My hypomanias tended to be pretty productive so I don't think they were nearly as apparent as my depressions, which tend to be pretty severe. My diagnosis was amended to BPII when I was about 16 but the pdoc I was seeing said he only did that because he couldn't yet diagnose me with BPD. I didn't get a true BPII diagnosis (along with a comorbid diagnosis of BPD) by a pdoc who actually believes that I have it until I was 22 or so. My hypomanias have definitely gotten worse since I've gotten older (I'm 26 now).
  2. I tried propranolol but unfortunately it didn't cut it for me. My pdoc explained that it would only help with the physical symptoms of my anxiety and was more of a tool to help prevent my anxiety from reaching the panic stages, as the physical sensations feed into the mental for me. I tried it as a PRN for a couple of months at 10mg and then also added 20mg to my daily cocktail but it just wasn't enough. She removed me from it and prescribed me 5mg of Valium PRN at my request. She has never acted like I was a drug seeker and never denied my request for a refill (I don't go through them very quickly). My advice would just be to explain your experience with the propranolol and request that she prescribe something that may be more effective for situations where your anxiety is more acute.
  3. I have sexual side effects from SSRIs. Unfortunately Zoloft is the only antidepressant that seems to work for me. My pdoc even tried adding Wellbutrin to no avail.
  4. Yes. I've done it with Lamictal, Zoloft, and Wellbutrin. The first time around the Lamictal worked really well. Second time, not so much, had side effects, not so great. Wellbutrin the first time around was like a sugar pill, second time around it was used to energize me and I think it helped. Zoloft has worked well both times I've been on it.
  5. I answer the same way as Melissa. I find even when family asks they don't really want to know. No one wants to hear "I think I might be spiraling into a mixed state" or even a simple "I've been better." I look at "How are you doing" the same as "Hello," just a greeting.
  6. I have both. I'm fairly certain it's not uncommon to have a comorbid BPD and BP diagnosis.
  7. It depends on who I'm talking to. I tend to be a very transparent person and if it comes up I'll be open about it with friends. I told one employer and that was fine. I'm not on SSDI but I'm not currently working so when the subject comes up I just tell people that I quit to focus on school - which is partly true, the other part was I was starting to crack under the pressure of a very high stress career.
  8. Just a couple of notes, as I haven't gone through it myself, bankruptcy stays on your report for 10 years (pretty much everything else comes off after 7). Suze Orman's advice is to file for bankruptcy when your debts equal your yearly income, so it sounds like something you should strongly consider. Just keep in mind your student loan debts are not discharged in bankruptcy so do what you can to keep them current.
  9. I'm in the minority. ADs work for me and do not catapult me to hypomania (I'm BPII). I find with an AD my lows don't fall as low as they do without one. I also have comorbid GAD and Social Phobia that the ADs are an amazing treatment for.
  10. Went on Bed Bath and Beyond and ordered a new bed set, some pillows, cheese markers, and a pair of champagne pliers. The idea of entertaining for New Years Eve is making me a little nuts and has me feeling like everything has to be perfect.
  11. Throw it into the fires of Mordor. It's that's too long of a trip for you to make, your garbage can works as well. Based on your blogs I don't think it's worth keeping.
  12. Yes, I've done it. Not really intentionally to induce a hypomanic episode, but that was the end result. I'd really recommend not doing it. You have therapy appointments lined up, wait and speak with them about alternative ways of dealing with the depression.
  13. I cried in my pdocs office begging her to tell me that I wasn't stuck permanently in the hell that is the Lamictal stupids. She promised me she'd never seen it last more than a couple of weeks after stopping and luckily for me my brain bounced right back.
  14. I took 40mg of Latuda with 200mg Zoloft, 300mg of Wellbutrin XL, 50mg of Seroquel, 100mg of Topamax, and 40mg of propranolol. Latuda didn't help me at all but I know a lot of people like it.
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