Wonderful.Cheese

Defeated.

I feel really really awful mentally. I’m losing it and am a mess since having to lower the zyprexa in half. Plus the nightmares are not helping. I either need to get back on a medium dose of seroquel XR or back to zyprexa 10 mg. I don’t know what to do. I can’t see pdoc for 3 weeks. I’ve tried calling my pdoc’s nurse enough times but she doesn’t call me back. What did I do to her ever? Are they spying on me here and she has read that I complained about her? I see tdoc tomorrow afternoon. But what can she do but watch me sob? I’ll try not to cry but...!

Slept 4+ hours to try to escape the day. But kept having nightmares that husband had cancer again. My worst fear. I don’t want to think about this anymore. That this can happen and is it a sign? I’m sick to my stomach. Now I’ll go to bed in 3 hours, hopefully minus the nightmares. They are relatively new.

When can I expect vraylar to be totally out of my system? I stopped it on May 4. I’m still taking Metamucil daily to be safe. I don’t want the bad stomach/bathroom stuff to come back. I don’t want to remain on Metamucil forever, but I don’t know when I can stop it either. Because even with once daily Metamucil I am still having a bathroom issue about every other week to every week, and I need to take Imodium to stop it. Is this still from the vraylar? Has it wrecked my gut? Or should I be concerned that I’m developing IBS like my mom has? She developed it around my age or so. Great.

Well, I think some people are more sensitive to different or certain medications. We are all different. And I think people can metabolize meds differently too. But I don’t know much about the science behind that. Maybe someone will chime in with more information about that. There can also be tolerance issues that can sometimes happen (like if you have been on a benzo for a long time, for example) with different meds which can impact doses needed for some individuals. So for instance, while some people may need 3 mg daily of Xanax, some people may only need 0.5 mg daily of Xanax to get relief. If a low dose works for someone else then that’s fine. Same with if someone needs a little higher dose to get that relief. As long as the prescribing pdoc is ok with it, of course. I don’t know if that is a very very low dose of Xanax or not @Lapis.Lazuli, but the important thing is whether or not @dancesintherain gets relief from her bad anxiety. And I do hope she does and will continue to. I’m glad both of you get anxiety relief from Xanax.

Love this! So peaceful and tranquil!

Frustrated at my current situation and life, lonely, down on myself for not doing anything really today. I'm just defective I guess.

Noooooo. Lol. No. I never have been able to! When watching a movie or TV at home, do you prefer the lights on or off?

I don’t trust this new billing lady at the clinic. She was behaving rather oddly around me. I fear she is going to try to have our monthly bill increased. We can’t afford much more at all. I’m afraid she is going to do some digging into my file and our finances and maybe even try to find me online like get into my mobile bank account app or fine me here and think we can afford more. Also she will do this to us mostly because she almost fainted when she heard our total bill amount to the clinic which has accrued over 10+ years. It’s crap ton of money. Like we’d have to declare bankruptcy if they came after us for the full amount. I don’t trust her one bit. I’m very suspicious of her and her new computer system.

No wisdom to add, but I just wanted to say I hope the anxiety subsides for you dances. Maybe someone with experience will chime in, because I too think this could be a useful discussion for people.

No, not me. I'm pretty dumb when it comes to most things. (what a fun pet BTW @echolocation !) What's your favorite TV show, if you watch TV?

A little sleepy and noticing the zyprexa hunger more. But I’m trying to be strict. Wondering if I’m making a wise decision regarding staying on zyprexa zydis. If this fails somehow with extreme side effects or I get sick again, I’m going to be completely discouraged and crushed, my pdoc will think I’m a nut job and no longer let me have any input, I’ll let my mom and husband down, etc. Husband said I need to pick a med and stick with it. I guess so.

Thank you! Although I am probably going to be put on zyprexa zydis 10 mg daily in addition to the abilify at my pdoc appointment in about 10 days. In the future I'd like to decrease the Abilify to 30 mg, but for the moment I'm wanting to enjoy semi stability for a while longer. I have been taking the PRN zyprexa daily 5-10 mg for about 3 weeks I think at least now. I'm so happy to hear you are becoming more stable! Yay! Great news!

So, no more anti-drooling pill, no more clozapine, no more vraylar, and hoping to make zyprexa zydis 10 mg part of my regular cocktail (I have been taking it daily anyway), also I take Flonase for allergies I forgot about that The AAP:  Abilify 35 mg - mood stabilizer and psychosis......30 mg Bedtime and 5 mg AM  The anti anxiety:  Klonopin 3 mg - severe anxiety (GAD)........1 mg AM, 1 mg afternoon, 1 mg evening/bedtime  The mood stabilizer: Lamictal 300 mg - mood stabilizer......300 mg bedtime   Birth control:   Yaz - birth control and heavy period control.......one pill AM  Sleep disorders:   Nuvigil 200 mg - sleep disorders/wakefulness.....200 mg AM Hashimoto’s disease: Synthroid 50 mcg - hashimoto’s disease.....50 mcg AM    Weight control: Metformin 2000 mg - weight gain prevention from psych meds.......1000 mg AM and 1000 mg evening Topamax 200 mg - weight management/loss, controlling overeating.....100 mg AM and 100 mg afternoon Allergies: Flonase - allergies.....spray in the morning  The as needed med (PRN):  Zyprexa Zydis 10 mg - as needed for breakthrough psychosis.....5 mg twice daily