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Talky Tina

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Status Updates posted by Talky Tina

  1. Sometimes it really does feel like there's no further steps to take. Sometimes it feels like you're not tired you just ran into a wall. A dead end. You can't turn around. You're on tracks. You're not moving so you stare at the wall and there's nothing else you can do. Just stand there and just grit your teeth, bite your tongue, squeeze your fists and try to will yourself forward. But you can't. You just scream at yourself. You just try to force all of your will into your body and you can't move.

     

    you're done. It's over. You're weak, gross, trash and done. You're not good enough. You're. Not. Good. Enough.  That's what you are. You are, Not Good Enough.

     

    Not is your first name, Enough is your last and Good is your middle. You want what you want. What you want is gross and bad. You should feel bad. You are bad. You are Not Good Enough. What's that like? What is it like to not be enough?

     

    Does it suck? Does it feel scary are you mad? Because you're Not Good Enough. Good job. Good fucking job. All of this. 29 fucking years and this is where you are? You piece of shit.

    1. Talky Tina

      Talky Tina

      All it takes is a dare. All it takes is a chance and you're not enough for it. So you just sit there angry at yourself. Unable to make a decision or to move. You just sit there. Angry, and scared. Never enough. Never good enough because that's what you are. It's why you're unemployed at 29. It's why you're not. 

    2. Talky Tina

      Talky Tina

      Do other people ever feel like that? It's weird how things like that feel like they're bubbling up from inside me sometimes.

  2. Don't call me dude

     

  3. Fuck the military

  4. Went over to a friends house for a LAN party. I was scared of going. Really scared. I haven't seen these people in over 6 months. I get there, I get misgendered and they say some pretty awful things... Not to me, but just in general. I had fun... But.. god it was stressful. It's 6 in the morning I'm going to get two hours of sleep and then get a ride home. *sigh*... I wore a skirt and strangers don't misgender me... What does it take for people to see me as the woman I want to be?

    1. Talky Tina

      Talky Tina

      I don't leave my apartment every day or even every 6. Not regularly.. I just wish it would go well when I do.

  5. Temmie!?

     

    I like your profile image. Thought I'd let you know.

  6. It seems like the link to the youtube thingy isn't working. Just thought I'd let you know.

    1. TakeAChillPill

      TakeAChillPill

       I probably deleted it a while ago.  I just wrote a new blog entry here.  You can read it again f you want

  7. My cat... Going through my drugs.

    fixed_picture14.jpg

    fixed_picture7.jpg

  8. I ramble from anxiety. It's 10:47. I slept a lot today but I'm also pretty tired. And cold and feeling a bit overwhelmed and don't really want to sleep and fuck all of it' God damnit right?

    heheh... I dunno. yeah. Whatever. Kay.

  9. I guess this is better than facebook. So that's cool. I joined in 2012 and was gone until 2016. So.. woot.

    1. saintalto

      saintalto

      Deleted my Facebook years ago. Psychosis and Facebook are a bad combination. 

    2. Talky Tina

      Talky Tina

      Sounds about right. I got rid of it after a fight evolved from me making a new profile for a friends dog. I guess it's mean to make a profile, out the dog as a trans guy, and then complain about hormones. But what do I know?

      I feel like facebook isn't good for most people.

    3. saintalto

      saintalto

      I posted many paragraph essays in response to other people's very simple statuses. I also sent way too many inexplicable and epic private messages to people I barely knew or people I hadn't seen in person for over 10 years. I was delusional and it really did make sense at the time. Doing my part for the greater good that is sentience at the atomic level. Woo!

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