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About photonist

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  1. out for two days? :surprised:are you serious. I thought it was not antidepressant i mean not like ssris. Main purpose of its prescription is to make you sleep and eat or i should consult with my doc. I didnt take it for 2days. I am not that sleepy. Didnt sleep all day. Does anyone use it as an antidepressant instead of sleep and appetite enhancher? is it effective and worth the side effects?
  2. I see, but i was already skipping some days. But sleeping over 10-12hours is not an option for me so i must skip it for tomorrow. Does it work for anything other than sleep, insomnia and appetite? It gave me the munchies alright but feeling like zombie all day and lacking the energy to exercise annoys me.
  3. Hi, my doc prescribed me with prozac 20mg + remeron 15mg. I think remeron was due to complete lack of appetite. Anyways it gave me the munchies alright. But since 3-4 days i take it without skipping a day or two. It makes me sleep 12 or even 12+ hours i feel tremendously tired i can not even do my daily exercise routine. My doc already gave it for appetite and rescheduling my circadian rythm and sleep pattern. But it disrupts my daily life. Should i stop taking it?
  4. Hmmm Kamaran i think it is alright that sometimes talking it out wouldn't work. I kind of can relate to what you say. Being ready to accept help, when i get extremely dark,depressed,anxious i still feel dark,depressed but i somehow tell myself that "i will get better, i am much more potent than this a depression can not beat me". I think you would find a way, your way to get better with time and some help and support. As you already say sometimes you can't really understand why you are depressed or all negative until your brain decides without your consent. I hope you really feel better soon Jui!
  5. thank you, both of my therapist and psychiatrist told me that i should write what i am thinking while i get those sad emotions. They say thoughts form emotions emotions form moods. And sometimes you can even get into autopilot do not become aware of the thoughts while you are feeling sad so i should write. And i kind of started to be more and more honest in my therapy sessions. Last year i had therapy going on for couple months. At first times i always filtered my thoughts did not tell what i think directly i managed to overcome this somewhat last year but this year i am much more honest in the session at least i was in the last session. After telling something major i thought to myself "how did i even say this let alone face it". It really is hard facing the reality accepting the facts, not distracting yourself from that thought. Well it might be a paradoxical way to do so but i can use this as a challenge to get some confidence hehehe. But writing/sharing feels so good!
  6. For a while i get on and off to depression my therapist or psychiatrist never told me her diagnosis if there was something specific. Anyways do you ever feel those or not i just wanted to know that. Or what do you call this, state, mood. Whenever i get happy there is always a worrying thought/feeling sometimes a little like having sand on your shoe it bugs you time to time. I am not sure if this is occuring often but whenever i feel happy i get this. i am always goal biased(i should be this accomplish this, i failed this, i have to do this etc etc).and this makes everything so dramatic. I feel like i really can not think clearly. It is like repeating words over and over again until you get a mental satiation and everything becomes meaningless. i get somewhat similar feeling throughout the day. It is really annoying. Forgetting the points you want to make yuck. It literally feels like my brain gets into powersaving mode. Sometimes all those stuff makes me think that all we every each individual of us are an experiment. An experiment about psychological dynamics to see what will the result be if the environment and genetics are altered. We all have cons and pros in our character, habits, willpower etc etc. Like in limits, when limit goes to the maximum you leak mental problems, psychological disorders. Some learn how to balance the water by enlightenment like tibetan priests some of them sacrifices their values, their moral codes and never break. Music in dark knight makes you feel that when two notes keep going and going they never break that is how the joker is he never leaks, because he is the leak yet a masterpiece of it. As one said, i sometimes get hyper, manic maybe and sometimes, i get zoned out,stoned-like, stuff dont make sense etc etc. But i dont get zoned-out often especially lately. i am in this mood right now, it feels like being stoned,zoned out. Forgetting what i wanted to say It feels good to write without filtering your thoughts, telling what you feel, think directly, I think this zoned out/stoned-like state is somehow a protection mechanism of consciousness to avoid the stress caused by conscious routines. consciousness detects when it gets into a recursion of distressing state it knocks itself out like act of sleeping a temporary suicide for a better tomorrow for a new rise. Anyways i think i should keep a diary or something. Listening to vivaldi made me somehow talkative. I just want your opinions no matter what they are. thank you for reading
  7. you are right about ssri s one brand works for you may not work for others or for you at a different time or in a different situation. I am getting considerably better. Well i do not feel like i am in that hyper/manic state or having run-on sentences today. I just hope it gets better. I hate the feeling that my mind feels like its on powersaving mode so i have to double the efforts to do the usual things i do. I was not told being bipolar, manic, hyper before. I had the usual depressions you know after some stressful events etc etc. Do you really think i should share those things with my doctor? Oh and btw is it me or caffeine really worsens the symptoms?
  8. First of all thank you all for your concern! I am thankful and really appricate it. I haven't had a chance to see the doctor yet i will see her monday. and today i am better relatively to those 3-4days and i had a session with my therapist today. We dug deep! Somehow digging deep made my inside voice mute after the session it was all quiet somewhat. This happened when she asked me or i just told her that i set extreme goals yet still fail miserably just because life seems boring outside of extremes and since my childhood i always saw things like you should do something important with your life or in anything and this leads me to trying to become professional even with my amateur hobbies etc etc yet after a intense while i give up hobbies, goals.Everything is dramatized when you are goal-minded i guess. All these feels so much burden to carry it feels awful. It is strange though that a week ago i was pretty pretty fine i didnt think any of those. Yet this week and the stress of my midterm exams kind of make me tired :/ sometimes throughout the day there is so intense feeling and so intense silence inside. But the thing is i am almost sure that i didnt have any of those thoughts in my mind 6-7days ago. When i was studying etc etc. But i dont know what i think on lately anyways i hate to talk much. I just hope i don't feel this loneliness frustration and this silence all those stuff are not worth feeling like this and besides prozac i take mirtazapine(remeron) for sleep.
  9. No matter what i just dont want to feel like this. I can even give up my obsessions compulsions wrong idealistic perfection attempts. It feels deep, intense, dark. My appetite is gone i eat 1 meal a day 2 tops if i force it. I am not exercising anymore i feel lethargic. I read about autoreceptors & ssri stuff so it makes you feel worse initially then autoreceptors give up. I hope it happens quick
  10. Hi, I am new to this site/forum, reading it for a couple days. Anyways Before taking prozac i had symptoms of extreme confusion, i even kind of forgot name of people, terrible concentration, complete distophia anhedonia, life seemed like something completely unenjoyable by abstractions made by human consciousness, only enjoyable stuff was you know to eat, to sleep but i had complete lack of appetite. I felt terrible its worse than being lonely like some silence before a big storm. And feeling those made me see a doctor immediately. I told her my symptoms and she said that you are really confused and mind fogged it does not take a doctor to see that. She prescribed me prozac/fluoxetine and remeron/mirtazapine. I started taking prozac due to feeling of not enjoying anything, forgetting When i started taking it, first 2-3days i didn't feel much difference i was feeling just like i always felt for a couple weeks anyways, after that i started to feel this not too intense but some kind of ecstatic euphoria its like feeling constantly peaceful. I really enjoyed every second. I was able to study 2-3hours a day without forcing and distressing myself. but since 2-3days i feel lethargic, horribly depressed and i feel alone like there is this absolute loneliness like silence like a shadow that is perhaps due to listening samuel barber and schubert i guess i should avoid those despite of their attractive magic. But i feel like can not enjoy anything like i just kill the time? Is this normal. Before prozac i used escitalopram, and zoloft they were okay. But i kind of want prozac to work i do not want to feel like this first week was wonderful now i am in 16. day i think or 17 They say this may be due to adjustments of autoreceptors. But people say they get worse when taking prozac but mine seems little different first 3-5days was not so different then i felt that peacefulness then terrible again. That made me post this. Oh and btw i used zoloft and cipralex/Escitalopram before. they were fine but that second week that euphoria-like feelinng of peace in prozac. They didnt have that i was not energetic like prozac. Will it get better? I have 3-4days before i can visit the doctor again. Thank you for reading and helping out
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