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About mydogtulip

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    General Smartarse

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    Far away

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  1. Thanks folks. Will contact my gp in the morning and try to get an emergency appointment. I've told my partner everything so they're looking out for me as well xx
  2. Hi guys. As you can see from my signature, I've been on quite a few medications over the years. My specialist has recently taken me off of Amisulpride as I felt like I wasn't on anything at all, and is wanting to retry some things I was on many years ago (basically going back through my file and picking old medications). He's said that since I haven't presented with a case of hypo/mania since I started seeing him 2 years ago, he wants to use anti depressants. I've been on a lot of mood stabilisers just on their own, but i've had no luck or serious side effects. He's put me on Sertraline/Zoloft and I'm worried that I'm not on a mood stabiliser to help. My delusions are starting to get worse and I'm having extreme suicidal thoughts accompanied by paranoia (such as being convinced I've killed someone and the police are going to come for me and that someone in the town is trying to kill me). I'm worried that it's the beginning of an episode and I don't know what to do. He is hundreds of miles away (I live on a remote island) and he is the only Psychiatrist that visits so I can't see anyone else. Should I call his secretary? I'm calling my GP in the morning to try and get an appointment as I'm seriously worried I do something stupid. Thank you xx
  3. I'm tapering up on Amisulpride right now (Don't think it's available in a lot of countries) and I'd give it a 6/10 so far. My head is definitely a lot quieter. The main issue has been daytime drowsiness, but I'm hoping that wears off.
  4. Hi guys. I was just wondering if anyone was willing to share with me what kind of guise their hallucinations and or delusions take? For me personally, it's mostly visual hallucinations at the moment with some slight voices (from the same 'person' mostly but he invites others in sometimes). It also comes as not believing that people are human and that they are either from another world or that they are mechanical and that they don't go to the bathroom etc, it's all just an illusion for my benefit. Also being stalked/followed is a big issue a lot of the time. Are you afraid of these things when/after they happen or are you so used to them that they don't scare you any more? Sorry for so many questions, I'm just trying to work out a few things in my own head just now. Many thanks x
  5. I find that I can go a few days without certain meds, but with Seroquel, if I don't take it, I don't sleep. Bloody annoying if I remember to take it too late (it takes ages to kick in, so if I remember too late into the night, it's not worth taking cos I'll sleep in the next day)
  6. I'm in the UK and I don't pay anything. Noone in Scotland has to pay, regardless of income/if you're working etc. After hearing from a few friends elsewhere in the world, I'm so glad, as I have no idea how most of you guys cope, even those of you with insurance! I just feel a bit guilty that I don't have to think about it, nevermind check round for cheaper options or not take anything at all
  7. Thank you for all the replies. I spoke to my PDoc and he suggested upping my Pregabalin a bit and keeping my Seroquel where it is for now. I'm a little bit calmer the past few days but still experiencing all of the symptoms I've had lately. Don't see him for another couple of months, so god knows what I'll do if I get worse or things get more intense
  8. Not trying to throw a spanner in the works, but if you are vegetarian/vegan etc, what are your views about the ethics behind the creation and development of your medications in the first place due to how they are tested on animals? My partner is vegan but is very much of the mindset that there are certain things that are completely outwith your control, and if taking medication is the only way of being stable, then it's an unfortunate evil that they must come to terms with
  9. I was seen by the neurology dept a while back and I got the all clear. I'll try and talk to my doc next week
  10. I have an app with my P-Doc on Weds (he flies up from the mainland so I only see him every other month and don't have a direct line to him), and I think I'm just going to have to tank myself up to just come out with it and let him know what's going on. My pills are just helping me sleep and no more, so perhaps a change really is needed. I'm just sick of docs/old PDocs saying that if I am aware whats going on then I'm obviously in control, but I'm really not. I'm on the complete line of just slipping over and it all falling out of my hands.
  11. I don't even know which board to post this in. There is so much going on in my life right now that I don't even know how I'm still here in any capacity. I really, *really* don't want to get into it (plus I don't want to leave any identifying markers incase people can trace me). I'm not too sure how I feel about the idea of "being aware" of my illnesses. At the moment, it is all too real. My partner is telling me I am SO VERY LOOOOOOOUUUUUD, I am convinced a friend in my year at uni is falling in love with me, I keep hearing music and it is interrupting anything and everything else, I am hearing voices more than before, I have a friend that I can see and converse with in another language in that noone else is aware of and I'm seeing people that noone else can see or hear apparently. The floor/ground constantly looks like it is breathing/living yet nothing I am experiencing is scaring me. I feel almost completely numb. I've barely cried in over a year. I took a glance at my GP's computer the other day and noticed that on my last notes, my P-Doc made reference to the lack of emotion in my face and in my voice. I'm pretty aware of what that can mean but I just can't bring myself to care. I don't know what I want or what's going on. I don't even want to be here most of the time, but I don't know where to even start with dealing with any of this...
  12. It's different for everyone, but for me it was a horrible experience. I was on 1,500mg and I was constantly running to the toilet with upset stomachs and I experienced a lot of hair loss. I was really out of it at that point and I can't remember if it actually helped me, but I was taken off of it because of the side effects.
  13. why the hell am I listening to Hanson????!?!?!?! That was 16 years ago ffs!!!

  14. The concept of people/things watching and/or following me is rife when I am going into mania. I realise that for a lot of people it can be seen as symptoms of the likes of PTSD or G.A.D. but it is completely believable that it can be a symptom of BP, especially when you feel more alert or vigilant.
  15. Cleaning and spending are definitely my top two things. I also bake more than usual, but due to my state, I often get my recipes wrong or go off and do something else while it's cooking and forget all about it as I've started fixating on something else by that point.
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