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About blackbird

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    For all that I found there...

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  1. Hi my friend...hope you are well


  2. I miss ya, blackbirdie. Hope you are well.

  3. Tarot, crystal healing and reiki are only one facet of my education. Yes they may appear low rent and stupid to you Inspired Neurosis but I have studied these arts and practise them and I am damn good at them. Plenty of sane people try Reiki and tarot and are not delusional. JUst because they don't suit your tastes doesnt make them any less valid. There are plenty of people without mental illnesses who are Reiki practitioners and read tarot cards. FWIW I hold an MA (Hons) from the University of St Andrews in International Relations which is a very highly competitive subject in which you need 3 As at A Level to study - one of the best departments in the world. St Andrews is the oldest and most prestigious univeristy in Scotland. I also hold an M Phil in Political Science from Trinity College Dublin which is the oldest and most prestigious university in Ireland. I am fully aware that the degrees I have obtained from the alternative universities are not officially recognised and frankly I dont give two fucks. Im doing them anyway because I enjoy them. I'm not claiming to be super woman. I work a minimum wage part time clerical job and the practise my Reiki, crystals and Tarot in my spare time. You seem to have a snooty attitude towards Tarot but I know I have helped many people with my work. As for my delusions. Never judge a man until you have walked two moons in his shoes. blackbird x
  4. I am posting back here to say that I am not misrepresenting myself at all. And for the record, i don't have any qualifications in astrology. As far as I am concerned I have two higher degrees from conventional and prestigious universities but now I am not interested in academia and I am doing alternative distance learning degrees - which are more like professional degrees than academic degrees. I am not being scammed and I am not delusional about these degrees but I resent the fact of having my academic judgement drawn into question. I have worked very hard for my non academic degrees, and while they are not validated by UK or US universities, they are accredited by a number of distance learning quality organisations and validated by the General Hypnotherapy Register. All of the non-degree courses I do are validated by NCFE who are an official awarding body designated to give qualifications OFFICIALLY RECOGNISED by the National Qualifications framework. I happen to have learnt an awful lot out of my so-called scammed degrees, for example, I took a module on auric Reiki attunements for mentala nd emoptional problems and I have had success in treating addictions, anxiety, depression and phobias. Iam not bullshitting. And I am able to put the knowledge I have learned into practise with family, friends and clients, one lady who has claimed that i saved her life. That when she came to see me the first time, she felt she had nothing to live for and she now comes to see me every Saturday evening to get Reiki and crystal healing for her various physical and emotional problems. And yes, I am a valid Reiki Master and crystal healing practitioner. Everything I have learnt is being used to good means. I am volunteering with a mental health charity and applying all the things I learned and actually doing good with my life - helping people as I want to help people and do good. Yes I know I use the Tarot and some of you may view it as being very low rent and trashy, but I have helped many people with the Tarot too. I am trying to help people now that I am doing well. And I do a very good job of it. As far as my delusions are concerned. I agree that psychic might tell me Im telepathic to hear what I want to say but the experience of telepathy is very very strong for me and continues to haunt me every day. I am not sure if it is real or not. 75% of it may be delusions but another 25% may be reality but it still happens and it feels real to me. This has been going on in my life for 9 years now and is not something I can shake off with a couple of antipsychotics - especially whenever i have had experiences were I could 100% say for certain that people were speaking every thought that came into my head - they were giving a running commentary on my thoughts. Yes this may be psychosis but the experiences have all been so 100% spot on for me that I cannot reason it away, and maybe by phoning the psychic I was trying to put my mind at rest. i would rather know whether I'm a telepath or just psychotic. If I knew I was a telepath I could be at peace with that. Nobody has had my experiences so no one can judge me - but I know that you can't encourage 'delusions' here. There are many things in my life that I have been delusional about but I cannot reconcile the telepathy thing. thanks to all for your support blackbird x
  5. I am never going to visit this site again after the abuse lost has posted to me. I work hard for my qualifications. They are hard work and i put a lot of effort into them. they are non traditional because none of the regular unis have degrees I want to do - such as MA in Life Coaching. I am happy and satisfied with my education. I know Im a telepath because I have had experiences that confirm this. the psychic has been through the same stuff and merely confirmed my belief. I am not delusional. Im sorry its too depressing to you lost but that's the way things stand. I have proved my academic credentials, I don't need a PhD from Oxford to feel academically satisfied. Ihave an MA Honours degree from the University of St Andrews in a highly competitive subject and an M Phil from Trinity Coillege Dublin. Any other degrees I undertake are for my own satisfaction and to enhance my private practice - they are for my own personal satisfaction and I work hard for them. They're not just a walk in the park. Just because its not Cambridge doesn't mean it is worthless. I also hold down a part time job which I have had for over 3 years and I have a thriving Reiki business.I am a certified Reiki Master and have the certificates to prove it. I am also a certified crystal healing practitioner and bach flower remedy therapist. The 'qualifications' I did were to enhance my knowledge of these subjects and they have added significantly to my private practice. They are not academic qualifications but professional doctorates for practising alternative health care workers. I resent my achievements being belittled and made to look like a moron in the forum Maybe you have 'recovered' but some of us still struggle and you should show compassion for those who are not as 'fortunate' as you blackbird
  6. My results will be dreadful - i was a walking zombie during those two weeks. at least im not reliant on them for going to uni though.... blackbird x
  7. Today I phoned a psychic to ask whether I am delusional and ill or telepathic. He was able to describe my situation exactly and said when he was young they put hom on a ton of meds for things he said. He said I am not psychic but I am a telepath and the fact that I still experience telepathy while on meds is a sign that I am a true telepath. He said I also have too much insight to be psychotic but to stay on the meds because it will assure me that I am telepathic and my expoeriences are valid no matter what the doctors said. I have always known I am a telepath. I am a dangerous person. I can describe a million situations where telepathy occurred. It is a relief to know I am not mentally ill. I can now reassess my identity as a telepath and not a psychotic. it is a huge relief to have this validated by someone who understands. I will explain this all rationally to the p-doc. blackbird x
  8. I have had absolutely no weight gain with risperdal consta. I would praise it to the hilt - a million times better than oral risperdal blackbird x
  9. sincere good luck and get in contact with me about the AS Level results on Thursday so we can commiserate/celebrate etc blackbird x
  10. hi there FWIW paxil at a high doage such as yours made me an emotional zombie. I need an antidepressant to ward off negative symptoms but perhaps you need a more energising antidepressant because whenever I am depressed my symptoms sound a whole lot like yours. Having flat affect sucks. best wishes blackbird x
  11. An ex boyfriend of mine who worked on mental wards (including secure forensic hospitals) used to call Serdolect/Sertindole 'Certaindeath' with his psychiatric colleagues because about 3 patients died from taking it (It has cardiac effects). I am on risperdal consta 50mg - equivalent to 6mg a day - and have found it to be superior to oral risperdal, Zyprexa, Seroquel, Amisulpride, Haldol, Clopixol. I have no side effects except no periods (which may be a result of my anorexia) and I feel about 50#% recovered psychosis wise. any questions about risperdal consta please feel free to pm me blackbird x
  12. psychosis is a bizarre state of delusional thinking, hallucinations (auditory/visual/tactile etc), disordered thinking that one goes through totally believing that this is reality. it is not until you snap out of the psychotic state that you realise how ill you were because at the time all the symptoms feel like they are really real. It has not been until i have gotten slightly better that I realised how very ill i was. Psychosis is a bizarre alternate reality full of confabulations and imaginations. Whenever you start believeing the shit that happens to you - that is psychosis. althoguh part of you may be detached from the process and realise what you are going through but its not until the end where you can evaluate and think 'Man I really lost it' That is my experience of being continuously psychotic for 9 years and only recently having come through (mainly) some of the worst of my 'delusions'. blackbird x
  13. hi jtsd-35, how are you?

  14. just a note to say that I have been speaking to my psychiatrist and the eating disorders team have decided to take me on as a patient. It will not be intensive therapy as, in the usual words of my p-doc "it's a very complex case". I will be on level 3 treatment but i dont know what that means and neither did the p-doc. But at last! I feel so happy! My BMI is 16.7 I will update you on my progress blackbird x
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