Jump to content


  • Posts

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Location
  • Interests
    Genealogy, Reading, Crocheting.
  1. Hi everyone. I don't post very often. Mainly because my meds are keeping things under control. I am self-diagnosed with AVPD. I am not entirely sure if I have it as I don't meet all of the criteria, but it fits with the problems that I have now and had in the past. I am lucky in that I have learned over time to manage the worst of my symptoms. I hate making phone calls, but can do so. I still try to get my husband to make them. I hate speaking in front of groups. This one has gotten a lot better within the the last 3 years (maybe because of age). I still wonder if there is something wrong with me because I have trouble making friends. I currently have 2, but I consider them acquaintances. I go out to lunch with them sometimes, but don't do a lot of other things. I don't mind not having friends. At this point I prefer to do things by myself or with my husband and daughter. I can manage job interviews with Ativan and that makes it tolerable. I recently got good news and terrible news. I have been accepted for a teaching position. I like the work, but have been doing this primarily as a volunteer. I did have a brief stint a year ago with a different employer which almost led to a depressive episode. It was triggered by getting feedback about my job performance. I cannot take criticism, constructive or otherwise. I do not get angry or say that the criticism is unwarranted. My response is always internal and physical. My heart starts to pound, I get knots in my stomach, and feel like I am about to faint. So far, I haven't fainted yet. I also want to run away. I mentioned it to my psychiatrist and he told me I could go through therapy for it, but that it would take many years and would be difficult. I am torn about working. I know if I stay at home and do nothing, it will not end well. If I go to work, I worry about doing everything right, did I insult someone, does this person hate me, etc. It all just sucks. I just wanted to rant to someone who could understand what I am going through. Thanks for listening. Sandra
  2. Hi, everyone. I have not been formally diagnosed with Avoidant Personality Disorder. However, while Googling info on how to handle criticism, I kept running into Avoidant Personality Disorder. I understand that not being able to handle criticism is not the only criteria. However, after looking at the criteria for the disorder, I feel I may qualify, although I think it is not as severe as it may be for others I have never had many friends-especially close friends. I consider all of my current "friends" as acquaintances. I have had 2 best friends in the 43 years I have been alive and 2 boyfriends. I ended up marrying the second one (who is a great person). I have always felt that I do not know how to deal with people and that I must be doing something wrong. I have pretty much been a loner. Not because I consciously choose to, but it always ends up that way. I do not mingle at social gatherings. I used to escape to fantasy books up until I got married. I have always had a fear of public speaking which has gotten better within the last 2 years--not sure why. I have learned to deal with not having friends and enjoy being a semi-loner. I love my husband and we have a great relationship. We have a lovely daughter. I occasionally go out to lunch with 2 of my acquaintances, but this only happens every 2-4 months. I have always HATED criticism. It makes my heart pound. I get a sinking feeling almost close to fainting. I know that the comments are not directed at me personally and is only meant to help, but I am always devastated. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and am being treated for that, but for some reason the above topics (except being lonely) never came up. I don't feel that my case is severe enough to require therapy, as I seem to be coping pretty well. I managed to get through college and just competed Graduate school so I can teach English as a Second Language. Not the most friendly position for me, but I really enjoy languages and meeting people from other countries.My most recent incident with criticism was through my volunteer work with ESL. The instructor asked me to move around the room to work with the students rather than just sitting with some of the students. A reasonable request and I appreciated that she made the request in writing, as that reduces the devastation somewhat. However, I still was angry and hurt. So my question is has anyone come up with any coping mechanisms for dealing with criticism? Thanks. Sandra
  3. The absent-mindedness has been going on for a while. I would say it was mild when I was younger. Putting empty milk jugs back in the fridge and staring off into space or out the window when class got boring. However, I would not forget important school work and religiously used a planner. As an adult I was good at remembering appointments without necessarily writing them down. Since I was diagnosed with depression and my migraines came back for good (I had 6 year break.) I have forgotten a couple of doctors appointments, meeting with friends for lunch, doing stuff that my husband needed me to do, forgetting where I leave keys, sunglassess, wallets, etc. I can't keep up with my daughter's homework even though I have read the assignment sheet a couple of hours before. I am trying to use my phone more frequently, but I sometimes don't hear the alarm or notifications. I was diagnosed with a mild version of ADD, but I don't think I had this much trouble before I was on all the meds. Either way, I was just curious what other peoples experiences had been. This is not something I am obsessing about, but it has led to my husband getting upset with me for forgetting important things i.e. how we handle my daughter's misbehavior, etc. Thanks, Sandra
  4. Hi, everyone. I have nice cocktail of drugs for multiple issues--Depression, Migraines, GERD, Allergies, High BP, ADHD. I have always been a little absent-minded about little things, for example, I used to put an empty jug of milk back in the fridge. I would also leave things in one place while I did something and then forget to take it with me. However, it seems that over time this has gotten work. I have completely missed a doctor's appointment (only one so far) and almost missed another by a few minutes. During Graduate school I have forgotten to do at least one homework assignment. At home, I forget to do chores or make phone calls or record my migraines. The problem at the moment is that my husband and I are using a points system with our daughter. I forget to write down points earned or used. I also forget to check the number of points she has earned when she wants to do something that requires points, such as watching TV. On the other hand, I do remember birthdays, address, etc. My question is does anyone know if any of the drugs I am currently taking (see my signature) could be causing this absent-mindedness. I hadn't really thought about a connection between my meds and the drugs and so I haven't had a chance to talk to my doctors about it. Still would like to know if anyone has had the same experience or has heard anything. Thanks,
  5. Follow up: I was able to take off work on the Monday I was supposed to see my doctor. He raised my dose of Ativan from 1MG a day as needed to 1-2 tablets (1mg each) 3 times a day. That has helped a lot. The anxiety was due to the stress from my new job. The Ativan did the trick and I will be done with the Summer session on July 5. My doctor did suggest trying to finish up the job and if I couldn't he would write a letter for medical leave. Thanks for all the suggestions.
  6. Thank you for the advice. I have several aspects that have aggravated the situation: 1) I just started the job 3 weeks ago 2) I was not able to reach anyone at my doctor's office. Only got the answering machine. 3) I have a test scheduled for the time I am supposed to be at the dr. I have not been able to create the test. 4) I have no lessons planned for either course. 5)I have to find subs for at least one class. 6) I have a lot of homework to grade for tomorrow. 6) I am not sure I can go to work after my dr.'s visit. When I first started on Ativan it knocked me out. I don't know what the dr. will try, but have concerns that I cannot be productive while on the medicine. So all of these things have built up to create a massive situation for me that I am not sure I can handle right now.
  7. Hi, everyone. I have had minor problems in the past with mild anxiety. Where I would just get a little nervous or what I call the "I feel like I am in the wrong place at the wrong time" moment which passes after a short amount of time. However, this seems to be entirely different. I can't eat, I am dizzy, I can't get my thoughts together, sounds bother me... I am fairly certain of the trigger-work related stress. My problem is as follows: 1. I called in sick on Friday because I was afraid that if I went in to work that I would lose it. 2. I am not sure why I didn't call my therapist, but it probably has to with the fact that she changed offices and I hate making phone calls to places I am not sure about. 3. My psychiatrist was out all Friday, so I couldn't speak with him. I am supposed to see him on Monday morning when I am supposed to be at work. 4. I am on 1 mg of Ativan as needed but used up all of them in the past 3 weeks so on my own with my anxiety symptoms. Right now I am not sure I can even set foot in the building for work. I am having problems just thinking about looking at the homework I am supposed to have graded by Monday. I really don't know what to do at this point. My DH is pretty understanding, but he thinks I am making a mountain out of a molehill. I probably am, but it doesn't help me feel better. Should I see my dr. first or try and brave work. I really am not sure about the latter. Help.
  8. My cocktail for the week: 60mg Cymbalta-depression 0.5mg Risperdal (this week going up to 1mg next week)-augments the Cymbalta 1mg Ativan-anxiety or insomnia (take your pick) 250mg Nuvigil-Daytime sleepiness related to depression that has been resistant to the Cymbalta 20mg x 2 day Adderall-ADD For other health problems, currently taking: 200mg Lamictal-migraines 100mg Imitrex-migraines (as needed) 40mg Nexium-hiatal hernia related acid reflux Zyrtec-allergies Botox injections- migraines I have 2 other medications for migraines, but they are rescue meds. Their names escape me at the moment. Sandra
  9. Ok. Thanks. I called my dr. just in case. I had a similar problem with Geodon, along with dry mouth, and insomnia.
  10. I was on Cymbalta withdrawal a few years ago. I flew to Germany and my luggage got lost in London. I went without for about 2 weeks. My symptoms were spaciness and just this sensation that everything I saw was sort of surreal. I ended up using St. John's Wort and it took care of the withdrawal symptoms. I don't recommend doing that without talking to your doctor though. I was not taking any anti-depressants when I did so and stopped as soon as I got my Cymbalta. You might try a vitamin for the cramping if it is muscle related. I think it is Magnesium or Potassium, but you probably should double check. I didn't have the itching, but I know that when I was given Morphine after my C-section they gave me an antihistamine to take care of the itching from the withdrawal. You might try taking Benadryl or Claritin, again check with your doc. Good luck. Sandra
  11. Hi, everyone. I just started on Saphris a few days ago because I couldn't handle the side effects of Geodon. Has anyone else gotten swollen ankles from Saphris? I am just checking as I am not sure if the swelling is due to combo of all the meds I am on (see below) and weight or if it is due to one of those specifically. Thanks,
  12. Hi, everyone. Just found this site via a search on Geodon withdrawal symptoms. Relatively minor (having an small anxiety attack), so far only on day 1. I only made it to 80 mg before the side effects fully hit me. I was diagnosed in 1999 with Major Depression and possible mild ADHD or rather ADD, not hyper just easily distracted. I have been relatively lucky and only needed to go to partial hospitalization twice. Both times within the past 5 years. Currently doing well, except for the Geodon withdrawal. I have been on Cymbalta and Nuvigil now for 10 years-never got rid of the sleepiness and grey fog that I have when I get depressed. Abilify was added about 3 years ago and with it came 30lbs. So now my doctor is trying to find another med besides Abilify. Looks like Saphris is the winner once I have gotten the Geodon out of my system. I have been on and off ADD medications, currently taking Adderall. Love that the site has a sense of humor.
  • Create New...